Barometer! Leigh Bowery is London's hot muse, why is everything AI named so bizarrely?

Going up!

Leigh Bowery

Dave Swindells, Daisy Chain at the Fridge, Leigh & Nicola 1998 (Dave Swindells / Tate)

“Dress as though your life depends on it, or don’t bother,” was the club kid’s motto. It’s in this spirit we launched into fashion week — and prepare for Bowery’s Tate retrospective.

The Room Where It Happens

(The Room Where It Happens)

This is Soho’s new musical theatre bar. I understand it sounds Kafka-esque to many, but singing servers? It’s all very New York.

Cotton Candy grapes

(M&S)

These are flying off the shelves at M&S and Waitrose after Joanna Lumley’s passionate endorsement. NB: they really do taste like sweets.

‘You smell of vanilla, darling’

(Byredo)

Well, of course! It’s all anyone wants to give a whiff of this season. Byredo, Margiela, Valentino or Gucci: they all offer a signature scent so specific you’ll want to get baking.

Going down…

Gravy cocktails

(Bisto)

Should you wish to avoid the style set, Bisto has helpfully opened a floating Wallace & Gromit-themed Gravy Boat restaurant, with gravy sour cocktails. You will have no bother there.

Ciggie fines

(Getty Images)

Careful — fines for dropping a cigarette are being ramped up again. You can still steal as many as you can hold and get away scot-free, though.

AI/robot names

X Æ A-Xii sits on the shoulders of his father, Elon Musk (Getty Images)

OK nerds, we concede. AI wins. Now, can you let us help name these things? From the pothole detection machine Robotiz3d to Elon Musk’s son X Æ A-Xii, it’s like you fell asleep on the keyboard.