The beloved companions of Baldur's Gate 3 have received a new line of minis featuring Astarion, Karlach, Gale, Shadowheart, Wyll, Lae'zel, and everyone's old pal Withers. No love for Halsin or Minthara, sadly. Perhaps that's a mercy, because creator WizKids seems to have sculpted these from crayons and then deep fried them before shipping. What in Mystra's name is this?
The real, genuine, not-made-up photos in this article were taken by our own Rollin Bishop, who received a box of these creatures in the mail unprompted. And it's not like just his minis, specifically, were delivered in a cement truck; several other people have shared their own minis with uniquely disturbing deformities. Your mileage may vary, but you'll be driving into a wall one way or another.
Lae'zel's hair is peeling off her skin. Withers looks like a half-melted, curmudgeonly snowman. Gale hasn't eaten any magic shoes in so long that his face is decaying. Astarion seems to have done his eyes and brows with a paint roller. Karlach is so hot that her mouth melted off her face and her axe fused to her hands. Wyll looks to be asking, understandably, what the hell? And Shadowheart has just seen some shit.
It's a gallery of horrors from top to bottom. The vibe is: failed Polymorph. I'll give these minis one thing: they had the entire GamesRadar+ team laughing this morning.
If you, too, wish to own the "D&D Icons of the Realms: Baldur's Gate 3 - Character Boxed Set," rather optimistically said to be "great for bringing your favorite Baldur’s Gate 3 characters to the tabletop," you can get the lot for $50. For my money, they're much better for practicing your Vicious Mockery, because holy crap, dude.
