Bikinis galore, but Baywatch is good clean fun, says Venezuela
Almost everything Venezuela's Hugo Chavez does divides opinion, and his latest move will be no different. The president has turned against everyone's favourite cartoon family, The Simpsons, removing the programme from its 11am TV slot on the basis that it is unsuitable for children. In its place, Venezeula's young innocents will be able to enjoy the wholesome, family-friendly entertainment that is... er, Baywatch.
"Controversial," commented the Times. Well, not really. The Simpsons has a long history of upsetting politicians. Back in 1992, George Bush Snr wanted to make American families "more like the Waltons and less like the Simpsons". Hardly surprising - while John Boy Walton ends each dirt-poor day of the Depression with a contented "good night, everyone," Bart needs right and wrong spelled out to him. Over the years, his blackboard punishments have included copying out the lines "I will not instigate a revolution", "I will not hide behind the Fifth Amendment", and "The pledge of Allegiance does not end 'Hail Satan'". But compared with Springfield's resident politician, Mayor Quimby, Bart could be John Boy's adorably mischievous little brother. Democrat "Diamond" Joe Q is a womaniser who takes bribes, embezzles taxes and consorts with local Mafia boss Fat Tony, at one point doing a deal with the don which results in Springfield's schoolchildren drinking rat's milk. All in all, you can see why national leaders - of whatever political persuasion - might not feel the show gives out quite the impression of civil society they'd like.
Still, removing the programme for breaching Venezuela's Law of Social Responsibility in Radio and Television and then replacing it with Baywatch? Actually, it's not as weird a move as it might sound. For a start, I doubt very much that the show was Chavez's personal choice of replacement. More likely the TV station, Televen, wanted to replace a popular show with the biggest crowd-pleaser it could find. Baywatch, listed in the Guinness Book of Records as the world's most watched TV series, is a pretty obvious choice.
I can imagine Chavez wouldn't object. For all that Baywatch has probably been responsible for more sexual awakenings than any other TV show, morally speaking it's pretty straight down the line. Its central characters exist in a world that is blissfully independent of the kind of world politics that the Simpsons, and for that matter the Waltons, have to live with. They are good guys: they are lifeguards (they rescue drowning people and they promote a healthy lifestyle), and in their spare time they bust drug rings, find escaped prisoners and stop would-be arsonists in their tracks. And despite the temptations, relationship plotlines tend to be more about romance than casual sex - CJ Parker and Mitch Buchanan did more to promote family values than Mayor Quimby ever will.
Obviously, I'm not trying to suggest the show is anything other than hypersexual, poorly-scripted rubbish. And from a feminist point of view any show which is most famous for shots of Pamela Anderson's breasts jiggling in slow motion is a complete nightmare. But while I sincerely hope that young Venezuelans don't start looking to Pamela Anderson or David Hasselhoff as role models, either one would probably be a better choice than Diamond Joe.
