Stumps report
Ali Martin’s report from Adelaide Oval is here:
Here’s how to orchestrate an Ashes comeback.
The controversy:
And Barney with the day one analysis on Jofra Archer:
That’s my cue to get out of here, thanks for your company and comments on what turned out to be an absorbing if lackadaisical day of cricket.
BIG DAY TOMORROW!
Goodbye.
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Stumps: Australia 326-8
That’s yer lot. An absorbing and hot day of cricket comes to a close in Adelaide. Australia played a series of poor shots to keep gifting England wickets, immediately after lunch the hosts were 94 for 4. Khawaja and Carey dug in for Australia with the latter going to an emotional century on his home ground.
Australia won the toss and won’t have counted on losing eight wickets on a belter of a wicket. England picked them up with a mixture of luck and design, their Ashes series hinges on whether they can knock over the tail sharply in the morning and put in a performance with the bat on what promises to be a scorcher in more ways than one.
Jofra Archer led the England attack with 3 for 29, he was by far the most potent and miserly of the bowling attack. Brydon Carse and Josh Tongue were patchy but kept going in the heat and Will Jacks had little control and got milked for a ton but also claimed two wickets. Both sides not performing at their best on day one, it is tantalisingly poised for day two.
83rd over: Australia 322-8 (Starc 33, Lyon 0)
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82nd over: Australia 322-8 (Starc 33, Lyon 0) Archer comes back for a one over burst before the close. After five dots Starc clips neatly off his pads for four! One over left in the day, you’d think England will be the happier of the two sides but they will need to bat to stay in the series tomorrow.
81st over: Australia 322-8 (Starc 29, Lyon 0) England take the new ball and Ben Stokes starts with a maiden. Stokes is vey full but there is no sign of early swing.
80th over: Australia 322-8 (Starc 29, Lyon 0) Will Jacks stitches together just his third maiden of the day. He has popped up with two wickets.
79th over: Australia 322-8 (Starc 29, Lyon 0) Interestingly, former international umpire Simon Taufel has been on Channel 7, he believes that earlier caught behind off Carey was out and it was a possible technology failure. Less of a murmur and more of a rumble with this one. Carey was on on 72 and Australia 245-6.
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78th over: Australia 321-8 (Starc 28, Lyon 0) Nathan Lyon is the new batter, he’ll be interested in the turn and bounce on offer in that Carey dismissal but has a job to do with the blade first.
WICKET! Alex Carey c Smith b Jacks 106 (Australia 321-8)
Carey is gone! A big moment in the game as England were wilting… Jacks gets some turn and bounce and Carey hacks across the line, a top edge ending up in Jamie Smith’s gloves. Top innings from Alex Carey who departs to a standing ovation.
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77th over: Australia 321-7 (Carey 105, Starc 27) The fifty partnership comes up between Starc and Carey, in just 10.5 overs. BIG TWENTY MINUTES INCOMING.
76th over: Australia 319-7 (Carey 105, Starc 27) Jacks is worked for four runs. 56,298 in the ground today – the highest ever attendance for a day’s cricket at Adelaide Oval. They are so lucky to have seen Will Jacks bowl. Ahem.
75th over: Australia 315-7 (Carey 103, Starc 25) Stokes to Starc, a thick edge flies wide of the solitary slip and away for four. A dangerous period before the close here for England, if Australia put on another 30 odd and this pair are unbeaten overnight then the day takes on a different hue.
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74th over: Australia 311-7 (Carey 103, Starc 21) Will Jacks is back on. He goes to a hundred of a different kind with sarcastic cheers greeting his expensive shipping of three figures.
73rd over: Australia 307-7 (Carey 101, Starc 19) Alex Carey goes to his third Test century and the first on his home ground! He removes his helmet and looks to the skies, he looks very emotional, understandable given the occasion and after the events this week in Australia. His father passed away in September too. He’s a lovely player and top bloke to boot, well done that man.
“Morning James, morning everyone.” Back at you Guy Hornsby.
“It’s cold and damp in South Manchester but waking up to 280-7 doesn’t feel nearly as bad as I expected, but then I can imagine some pretty bleak things, having grown up watching cricket in the 90s. I suspect that Australia will not be happy having lost 7 wickets, but this left-handed pair could easily add another 50-70 so England have to keep probing here. I just want a contest where England don’t slash their wickets away, is that too much to ask?”
It’s the time of year for Miracles innit?
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72nd over: Australia 302-7 (Carey 97, Starc 18) Starc aims a swipe at Carse and clears the infield to pick up two. Shadows stretching across the outfield at Adelaide Oval. Three hundred up for Australia and Carey nearly has one of those to himself.
71st over: Australia 296-7 (Carey 96, Starc 14) Stokes brings himself back on in place of Tongue. Just two runs off the over as Carey inches closer to a ton. The debate about whether he nicked off earlier on is still raging. On Channel 7 in Australia, Hayden and Ponting reckon Carey edged it and the snicko wasn’t lined up correctly.
70th over: Australia 294-7 (Carey 95, Starc 13) Bish and bosh! Starc clears the front leg and deposits Carse over cover for four and then follows up with a meatier and more balances strike down the ground for another boundary. The new ball is ten overs away, England would dearly love to not have to use it.
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69th over: Australia 284-7 (Carey 94, Starc 4) Carey pinches a single off the final ball of Tongue’s over to keep strike for the next. Remember, Mitchell Starc top scored for Australia at the Gabba. This batting effort is far from over with him and Carey still out there.
68th over: Australia 282-7 (Carey 93, Starc 3) Carey careers into the 90s by slapping Carse wide of mid on for four. He’s in a hurry, and nearly plinks a catch next ball to the outstretched hand of Crawley at midwicket, the ball just plooping over the King of Clapham’s regal hand.
67th over: Australia 274-7 (Carey 86, Starc 2) Tongue goes short with the field set appropriately. Not sure about this as a tactic, why not target the pads and stumps? I know nuthin, obvs. Starc clips for two to get off the mark.
66th over: Australia 271-7 (Carey 85, Starc 0) Starc survives his first ball from Carse.
WICKET! Pat Cummins c Pope b Carse 13 (Australia 271-7)
Cummins is caught at short leg off Carse! The Aussie skipper reviewed straight away suggesting he was confident he hadn’t actually hit it but the snicko reveals a spike and the replays show a deflection. Australia are seven down and Starc comes out to join Carey. Do not adjust your set.
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65th over: Australia 269-6 (Carey 85, Cummins 11) Cummins shows his class with the bat by tucking Tongue away for four off his pads.
Mike Selvey, formerly of this very parish, is tuned in and has a revelation for those who were enjoying some Eddie and the Hot Rods riffing earlier!
“Morning. Just joined and scrolled to the chat at start of play. So trivia. My erstwhile next door neighbour and friend managed Eddie and the Hot Rods. He also managed Manfred Mann, Uriah Heep ( ever so ‘ eavy ,ever so ‘ umble ) and the Blues Band. I worked for him one winter and met a few musicians. Alexis Korner the most memorable.”
64th over: Australia 262-6 (Carey 84, Cummins 5) Gah! Jacks is cut for four by Cummins and then plonked into the stands at long on by Carey! SIX! Twelve off the over and Jim Maxwell is particularly scathing about Will Jacks on the BBC’s TMS commentary. In fact he’s positively apoplectic.
“Fred Titmus would be turning in his grave watching this… this bloke would be dropped from the seconds to thirds in Sydney grade cricket.”
63rd over: Australia 250-6 (Carey 77, Cummins 0) Drama as England think they have Carey caught behind! Tongue and the keeper and cordon go up as one and there is a noise… the umpire says not out but England send it upstairs immediately. NOT OUT! What was it then? The snicko doesn’t sync up with the a large spike appearing before the ball passes Carey’s bat. Have England been duped by the old clicky bat handle or is the snicko not fit for purpose? This one will rumble.
62nd over: Australia 245-6 (Carey 72, Cummins 0) Jacks continues and keeps the scoring to a single. Here comes Tongue with the bit between his teeth. Me either. It’s early.
61st over: Australia 244-6 (Carey 71, Cummins 0) Fair to say Big Patty C wouldn’t have wanted to be strapping the pads on after winning the toss earlier today. Tongue fires his first delivery to the Aussie skipper down the leg side. Hmmm. I’m saying nothing.
WICKET! Josh Inglis b Tongue 32 (Australia 244-6)
Tongue does strike! He hurries the ball onto Inglis and the batter is caught in two minds, an under edge splattering the stumps. Is Josh Tongue about get his infamous mop out? Here comes Pat Cummins, he won’t have had a bat in the middle for quite some time. England have a moment here…
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60th over: Australia 238-5 (Carey 71, Inglis 26) Carey rocks back and bunts Jacks for four through the leg side! Archer is going to have a blow and Josh Tongue is coming on for a bowl, England need something from his golden arm in order to break this burgeoning partnership.
59th over: Australia 231-5 (Carey 66, Inglis 24) Archer spears down his fifth maiden. Might be time to see if Root can do a better job than Jacks with his no nonsense tweakers.
58th over: Australia 231-5 (Carey 66, Inglis 24) Jacks is slapped by Inglis for four. This is a problem for England, Jacks isn’t giving them any control and it means Australia can bat out Archer and collect runs at will the next over.
57th over: Australia 226-5 (Carey 65, Inglis 20) Archer continues to look threatening, a sharp bouncer nearly cleans up Carey but he manages to glove it safe.
56th over: Australia 222-5 (Carey 62, Inglis 19) Jacks continues to leak runs, Carey collects a brace of twos and then larrups a short ball to the midwicket fence for four. Close! Carey loses his shape trying to cart another short ball from Jacks and he completely misses it, the ball narrowly missing the stumps and the outside edge.
55th over: Australia 213-5 (Carey 54, Inglis 18) Archer beats Carey with a beauty that jags away late, he’s been on the money since tea and has been England’s best bowler all day, currently with 3-21 off 13 overs and four maidens to show for it.
54th over: Australia 211-5 (Carey 53, Inglis 17) Inglis is a dangerous prospect for England, he nails a reverse sweep off Jacks to pick up four. Jacks burgled the wicket of Khawaja but the Aussies have got after him, he’s gone for 63 from his eleven overs so far.
53rd over: Australia 203-5 (Carey 52, Inglis 10) Archer hurries one onto Carey and he implores the umpire to raise his finger. He doesn’t and Stokes sends it upstairs at the behest of his fast bowler. NOT OUT. High and missing leg. Drop! Carey smashes a back foot drive through cover and Carse nearly holds on to a stunner diving low to his left! It was a tough one but they sometimes stick. Carse did well to get in a position to take it and Stokes gives him props for the effort. A second maiden on the spin for Jofra.
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52nd over: Australia 203-5 (Carey 52, Inglis 10) Carey sweeps for three and goes to a well made fifty, he’s a thorn in England’s side once more. Nobody mention Brad Haddin 2013, I thought of it once but I think I got away with it…
Inglis reverse sweeps Jacks for four to keep Australia ticking over and the 200 is up for the hosts.
51st over: Australia 194-5 (Carey 48, Inglis 5) Archer starts with a probing maiden, full and outside off, Inglis leaves alone and gets in behind. Will Jacks to continue after tea, there were some signs of spin and bounce before the interval. Nathan Lyon licking hips lips no doubt.
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England emerge after tea and Jofra Archer is going to start with the ball. Carey and Inglis head to the middle with work to do. Everyone is saying this is a 450 plus pitch.
BIG SESSION INCOMING!
50th over: Australia 189-5 (Carey 48, Inglis 5) Jacks bowls the final over before tea, Carey paddles and Inglis clips. Five off the over and that is the session. England are well in this match having taken/been gifted five Australian wickets on a shirt front in Adelaide.
“G’day James! Jacks with some clever bowling and a Bashir Special!” Writes Jazba. “That was a very English shot from Khawaja. Mopping up the tail been a theme but if England can get in tomorrow... It’s on.”
They’ve got tail mopper in chief Josh Tongue in their ranks too, everything’s coming up roses you say? Time to brew a vat of Kenco, back soon.
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49th over: Australia 189-5 (Carey 45, Inglis 3) Stokes into his sixth, he goes short and Inglis plinks a pull shot over midwicket! All of Australia’s batters have got themselves out you could argue, perhaps with the exception of Weatherald though that one is still debatable. Stokes slams into the middle of the pitch with a leg-side trap – he’s channeling Jardine a little here, he’s got the aquiline features of the canny Scot. No dice with the plan this over and it looks like very hard yakka bowling bouncers on this pitch and in this heat.
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48th over: Australia 189-5 (Carey 45, Inglis 3) Jacks has found a better length and looks more threatening, the wicket has got his dander up. He finds some bounce to new batter Josh Inglis. England buzz about in the Adelaide heat, Stokes is coming on for another over before tea. He’ll have his eyes on another double strike in quick succession.
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WICKET! Usman Khawaja c Tongue b Jacks 82 (Australia 185-5)
What have you done Usman?! Khawaja gifts his wicket to Jacks and there will be no redemptive ton. A half hearted sweep shot is hit uppishly into the deep and Josh Tongue takes a smart tumbling catch. Another Australian batter gifts his wicket away and England get a welcome shot in the arm.
47th over: Australia 185-5 (Carey 44, Inglis 0)
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46th over: Australia 185-4 (Khawaja 82, Carey 44) Stokes looks a little weary, he’s into his fifth over of this spell and it is sweltering. Tea break incoming, might be some ice baths to go with the cucumber sandwiches for some of the England lads.
45th over: Australia 183-4 (Khawaja 81, Carey 44) Glenn McGrath reckons tomorrow might be the best day to bat on this wicket, with the sun baking down and the ball coming on nicely. It is supposed to be 39 degrees tomorrow… England have been gifted a couple of wickets in this session, they’ve been too short once more with only four maidens bowled all day. Jacks is worked for three singles.
44th over: Australia 180-4 (Khawaja 80, Carey 42) England are beginning to wilt in the heat. Khawaja lacerates a cut off Stokes for four to move into the 80s. This is some Lazarus act from Uzzie.
43rd over: Australia 175-4 (Khawaja 76, Carey 41) This is Khawaja’s first score over 60 since his double ton against Sri Lanka fifteen Test matches ago. Jacks is milked all too easily for seven runs, he isn’t blocking up an end or looking likely to take a wicket at the moment. England have really messed up their spin options on this tour, they’ve lost their nerve over Shoaib Bashir when it really mattered, plenty of people saw that coming a long time ago. Jack Leach is watching on somewhere feeling particularly rueful no doubt.
42nd over: Australia 168-4 (Khawaja 71, Carey 39) Stokes pitches up and targets the stumps and front pad. Michael Vaughan thinks England have been too short, allowing Carey and Khawaja to hang back and play cross bat shots instead of tempting them forward on that in-between length. Stokes has the memo though and nearly pins Khawaja lbw but for an inside edge. Hands on head for the skipper, it looks hot work out there, the mercury nudging 35 degrees. Similar here in deepest Sussex as I feed the log burner another chunk. Don’t tell Monbiot!
41st over: Australia 167-4 (Khawaja 71, Carey 38) A neater over from Jacks, just two singles off it. Khawaja edges closer to what would/could/will be a remarkable Ashes century.
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40th over: Australia 165-4 (Khawaja 70, Carey 37) Close! Stokes clonks Carey on the helmet, beating the keeper-batter with a short ball and it flies away for four. A glancing header Les Ferdinand would have been happy with. Carey is fine to continue after a concussion check. Stokes collects his cap and strides off to command his troops, he’ll know just how crucial this passage of play is in the context of the series.
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39th over: Australia 160-4 (Khawaja 69, Carey 37) Khawaja dances down and lofts Jacks for four over the top. Nifty footwork from the old stager. Dare I say it but Australia have soaked up the pressure and are now putting it back on England. Khawaja comes out of his crease once more and collects three down the ground. Nine runs off the over with little fuss. Ominous, ominous, lemon ominous.
38th over: Australia 151-4 (Khawaja 61, Carey 36) Stokes thunders in with sweat glistening off his arm ink, he’s full to Carey with a slip and gully in place. England need him to break this partnership by hook or crook. Five dots stitched together before Carey drives for a couple off the final ball.
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37th over: Australia 149-4 (Khawaja 61, Carey 34) Thanks Daniel, hello all. Will Jacks is summoned for a twirl at a critical juncture in this first day. Khawaja and Carey are rebuilding nicely, they’ve put on fifty odd since the double brain fade from Labuschagne and Green in the first over after lunch. Jacks gets through his over and it is fair to say he looks unthreatening on early evidence. Three singles collected off the over, stand by you beds – here comes the England captain for a bowl.
36th over: Australia 146-4 (Khawaja 60, Carey 32) Tongue does continue and Carey takes his first ball for one, then Khawaja sees away the next five. That is drinks, which means my watch is over; here’s Jim Wallace to croon you through to the close.
“I was, in my teens, a decent enough opening bat when my parents moved to SA for a few years,” says Julian Menz. “I learned how to deal with the quicker wickets and bowlers. I never got used to the heat though, and we were out there with pads, a box, and not much else. No helmets to sweat in, but it was still beyond brutal.
Anyone judging English cricketers in the Southern hemisphere/sub-continent has to understand that, even if they are fit and well-trained athletes, it is extremely draining. I saw Root celebrating his century in the last test, and I know I would have passed out from heat exhaustion long before.”
Yup, KP told me that the ton he’s most proud of is Columbo, for exactly that reason.
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35th over: Australia 145-4 (Khawaja 60, Carey 31) There was an ad between overs playing Born Slippy, and I’m not sure there’s any sound in the world that can take me back to a time and place as effectively as the opening to that tune. I guess part of it is the music itself, but the cross-pollination of music-film-book is also part of it, with added… zeitgeist. The ruse of Tongue changing ends hasn’t worked, and I wonder if he’ll get another over, but in the meantime, two singles off Carse’s first two balls raise the fifty partnership – off 55 balls – and a further single means it’s three all told.
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34th over: Australia 142-4 (Khawaja 59, Carey 29) Tongue’s far too straight, so Khawaja flicks him to the fence for four then, when he’s short next ball, cuts hard for four more. It’s remarkable how quickly and often momentum is shifting in this match and, as I type, Khawaja plays and misses then, next ball, calls Carey for one then sends him back as Pope’s shy misses. That could have been extremely hilarious.
33rd over: Australia 134-4 (Khawaja 51, Carey 29) Khawaja dabs, runs, and that’s the unlikeliest of fifties. This morning, he wasn’t playing, his Test career potentially over, and now he’s waving his bat to the the crowd; it’s a funny old life. Another Carse no ball follows, then two singles, pressure receding, but Carey slaps the final ball of the over into the turf and it races away as they run two.
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33rd over: Australia 128-4 (Khawaja 49, Carey 26) The pressure of having a situation to exploit is different to the pressure of trying to save face, because the former comes with expectation. Tongue, it turns out, was changing ends, replacing Archer, and his loosener is poor, easily driven to the cover fence by Carey – the kind of ball we saw a lot during the English summer, but until just then, not today. Then, after two singles, Carey throws hands through a cut, and that’s four more; two carved to point makes it 12 from the over, and Australia now have two set batters.
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32nd over: Australia 116-4 (Khawaja 48, Carey 15) Carey uses Carse’s pace to flow through cover art the top of the bounce, so Stokes sets off in pursuit, dives, pulls back … but while touching the boundary, so it’s four. He makes his point, though: no one loves a lost cause more. In comms, Swann is trying to ruin the vibe by getting bantorious while, back in the middle, Carey adds one to cover; if England are serious, they’ll find a way to take another wicket shortly.
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31st over: Australia 111-4 (Khawaja 48, Carey 10) It’s been a quiet start to the Test for Jamie Smith, which I’m sure he’ll appreciate after his ordeal at the Gabba. Five dots, then Khawaja again schleps from outside off into the on-side for two.
“Stark contrast in the technique, gameplan and temperament of Khawaja and Cameron Green,” reckons Chris Paraskevas. “There is undoubtedly a very good cricketer in the latter, but his match awareness is consistently poor and undoes his good work. Khawaja has played the match-saver before, perhaps most famously in Dubai in 2018 (great innings to watch, really old school stuff) and this pitch seems tailor made to his unique skillset/psychology.”
Green’s shot was so similar to Labuschagne’s in that both seemed unreal, like they were giving their wickets away deliberately, or without caring, when we know nothing could be further from the truth.
30th over: Australia 109-4 (Khawaja 46, Carey 10) Carse replaces Tongue and goes around to Khawaja, looking to cramp him outside off. I wonder if his stance, more face than side-on but looking towards the off- side, means he’d find balls slanted across rather than into him harder to face. A single gets him down the other the end, then a lovely delivery, seam scrambled, is too good for Carey’s edge. Am I seriously finishing my stint at drinks and going to bed?
29th over: Australia 108-4 (Khawaja 45, Carey 10) Carey looks pretty confident out there, and you’d not put it past him to play a Dujon; when West Indies were dominating, it felt like on the rare occasions their top order went cheaply, he or Gus Logie rescued the situation. Anyhow, Carey leaps, opens the face, and cross-battedly wafts over gully; the ball drops safe and they run two. If it gets much hotter, maybe the Barmy Army trumpet melts.
28th over: Australia 106-4 (Khawaja 45, Carey 8) Tongue’s around the wicket to Khawaja; Pope and Duckett are five metres apart at short midwicket, I guess to take the flick out of the equation on the basis that it won’t be easy to score without it. And after four dots, Khawaja flits with one outside off, edges … but not for the first time today, the ball drops short of slip. Looking from above, they do seem a fair way back; two sent of the open face to third man complete the scoring for the over.
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27th over: Australia 104-4 (Khawaja 43, Carey 8) Carey turns Archer to the fence at square leg for two, and if England can break this partnership, they’ll really feel like they’re in control. A single brings Khawaja on to strike so the bowler goes around and slings down a surprise bouncer that flicks the helmet, before a further single completes the over. This is some intense stuff.
26th over: Australia 100-4 (Khawaja 42, Carey 5) It’s Tongue taking the ball from the other end, which makes sense – he was the next best bowler this morning, after Archer. Australia will be, er, spewing that they’re four down given England’s overall performance, but it’s also the case that they’ve been on the wrong end of two ludicrous catches from England’s lankiest and least agile fielders. I’m sure they see the funny side; two off the over.
25th over: Australia 98-4 (Khawaja 36, Carey 4) Archer is zipping in now like Orko from He-Man, but Carey turns him away for four to get off the mark. We then see the Carse catch again and it’s even better than I first thought: he dives right, grabs with his left, but around the back of his right forearm. Sensational behaviour.
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WICKET! Green c Carse b Archer 0 (Australia 94-4)
SDFLJBFDKLJSDBFKAJLBFASEKJBASDF! Archer is short, a bit straight, and Green lazily flicks wide of Carse at midwicket … but the diving catch, strong arm and wrist holding on as they crash to earth, send him on his way! Two wickets in three balls and is the series still alive?
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WICKET! Laubschagne c Carse b Archer 19 (Australia 94-3)
OH MY COMPLETE AND UTTTER DAYS! Forty minutes to prepare mentally to go again and Labuschagne flaps a gift to midwicket, first ball! It was almost as if he’d forgotten he was in a match, and that carelessness will haunt the nightmares of his grandchildren.
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Archer has the ball….
Back come the players and we’re good to go again.
If England can’t break the current partnership early in the session, they’ll have a problem. Amazingly, it looks like the best deliveries are fullish, to hit the top of off, and the onus is on Archer to make something happen. If he can find those lifters that force the batters to play, he’s in the game.
I’ll be back in 35 or so – don’t you go changing.
LUNCH: Australia 94-2
24th over: Australia 94-2 (Labuschagne 19, Khawaja 41) I doubt the batters go hard at Jacks in this over, and his first three deliveries yield singles, but then Khawaja can’t help himself, which tells us how secure he feels; he’s down on one knee, a big stretch, and he monsters four through midwicket. So Jacks goes wider, there’s a bit of turn, and it’s edged … but drops short of slip, It’s been a pretty evening morning, Australia ending it in the ascendancy, but another couple of wickets and things chance. Amazingly, the next hour is crucial.
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23rd over: Australia 87-2 (Labuschagne 17, Khawaja 36) I wonder if Khawaja had a word with himself after the drop. Reprieved by Smith’s illness, he started nervously, then was reprieved again by the drop; in my ignoramus’ imagination of what elite sportsfolk say to themselves, at that point, you tell yourself to accept gifts and enjoy the moment. Anyroad up, Labuschagne takes a single to square leg, raising the fifty partnership in the meantime, then Khawaja again yanks Stokes from outside off through the leg side – this time to deep backward – and this is decent batting now. we’ll have one, maybe two more overs before lunch.
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22nd over: Australia 82-2 (Labuschagne 16, Khawaja 32) Jacks replaces Tongue, and Australia will want to get after him – if they can hit him out of the attack, England will have to flog their quicks. I know he’s in the team for his batting and fielding, but my guess is the England management also feared for Bashir, not a better enough bowler to be worth the risk. Khawaja takes two, a single and a three follow, then he sweeps hard for four, and that’s 10 from the over.
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21st over: Australia 72-2 (Labuschagne 13, Khawaja 25) Stokes in again and his first three deliveries yield two singles, then Khawaja walks into one, again guiding from outside off into the on-side, this time towards midwicket; they take two. A squirted single then completes the over, and that’s the second ball this morning that’s kept lower than the batter expected, but he’s batted much better since Brook gave him a life.
20th over: Australia 67-2 (Labuschagne 12, Khawaja 21) Two dots, then Khawaja cracks a square cut over the top for four through point; a single follows and this has been a really good session of Test Match Cricket Ashes Cricket, fluctuating and undulating. The more I see Brook’s drop, the more I think he had to catch it, and England badly need to rdeem it before lunch.
“It’s hard to top an anthem that clearly rouses huge emotion, and eventually dissolves into a collective roar,” says Scott Blair.
Agree, it’s like the “Siiiiii” at the end of Italy’s – and Ivan Zamorano leading Chile’s at the 1998 World Cup was also immense.
19th over: Australia 62-2 (Labuschagne 12, Khawaja 16) Stokes is a little short and Khawaja is on to him, hauling from outside off to the square-leg boundary for four, great shot. A drive to the fielder follows, then a single to midwicket, and then one that clobbers the pad, low down! It looks plumb at first glance, the appeal is vociferous … and the umpire says naw. Stokes intimates an edge, but it was a really good delivery, exactly the kind he’s trying to bowl. Tangentially, I was at a funeral recently and saw someone’s headstone describing them as “a vociferous reader”; it must’ve been Paulie Walnuts’ old man.
18th over: Australia 57-2 (Labuschagne 12, Khawaja 11) Tongue’s first ball is too straight and Khawaja flips it off his tootsies to the fence at deep square, then shoves one more to cover. He’s starting to feel comfortable, but Tongue is kicking up decent pace here, his line and length more disciplined than in the English summer.
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17th over: Australia 52-2 (Labuschagne 12, Khawaja 6) Stokes charges through a maiden, and England are doing a decent job here, but badly need another wicket or two in the final half-hour of the session.
16th over: Australia 52-2 (Labuschagne 12, Khawaja 6) Khawaja edges two past gully’s dive, and his open stance is almost asking Tongue to fire in yorkers. A false stroke knocks ball into track, then he goes with the drive, edges hard, and at two, Brook half-dives, gets borth hands to the ball … which bursts through. That wasn’t easy, but he’s there to catch those; I’m not sure he needed to jump across, and it helped him misjudge the height, whereas if he’d reached, he’d have had a better change of keeping it in.
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15th over: Australia 48-2 (Labuschagne 11, Khawaja 3) Labuschagne defends one, then after Stokes doesn’t land correctly, pulling out of the delivery, he lets the next go by. A no ball follows, then four flicked fine off the hips … no, off the actual hip, but the runs are given to the batter. And they are again, but that’s because he’s presented the full face and laced between mid-off and cover, the timing glorious.
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14th over: Australia 39-2 (Labuschagne 3, Khawaja 3) Labuschagne takes one to fine leg while, in comms, Swann says that though there’ve been a few examples of right-armers getting lefties out from around – Flintoff/Gilchrist and Broad/Warner – fielding at slip, he always preferred it if they came around, as if it nipped back nn it was hitting the pad and if it went across, he was in the game. That’s because Tongue is coming from around, and so far he’s been pretty tidy; as I type, Khawaja edges him into the pad.
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13th over: Australia 38-2 (Labuschagne 2, Khawaja 3) Stokes introduces himself and this situation seems made for his shamanic sense of timing. Labuschagne turns to deep square for one while, in comms, Jason Gillespie compares Smith not playing to McGrath treading on the ball at Edgbaston in 2005. I must say, this doesn’t feel anything like as seismic, maybe because this isn’t as close, but more because McGrath had just destroyed England at Lord’s. One off the over.
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12th over: Australia 37-2 (Labuschagne 1, Khawaja 3) Tongue replaces Carse, who went for 29 in his five overs – and his wicket was a four-ball that was rescued by the catch of a lifetime. Around to Khawaja from the off, Tongue’s nice and full to begin with, returning a confidence-building maiden, and that’s drinks.
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11h over: Australia 37-2 (Labuschagne 1, Khawaja 3) Archer will surely fancy a go at Khawaja, who’s on strike, and the batter fancies getting up the other end, as you might – he turns around the corner, they hesitate then take the single, and the throw misses, though they were home in any event. Still, it’s nervous out there now, and a leading edge proves that, Labuschagne taking one into the off-side when planning a flick to the on. This is Archer’s sixth over, so could well be his last – I bet his captain fancies an exhibition flog-self-in-the-heat while the going’s good.
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10th over: Australia 34-2 (Labuschagne 0, Khawaja 1) This is now a huge point in the series: if England can make further inroads, they’ll be in it, but if they can’t, they’re almost out of it having barely participated. Three dots, then Khawaja fends off the body behind square on the on-side – that was fuller and straighter – earning one. It’s the only run from the over.
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WICKET! Head c Crawley b Carse 10 (Australia 33-2)
ONE BRINGS TWO AND THIS IS A SCREAMER! Carse continues as we all thought he should, Head drives hard, and at short cover, Crawley is at one with it, diving left to grab just above ground, a giraffe doing a dying swan!
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9th over: Australia 33-1 (Head 10, Labuschagne 0) Goodness me, England needed that; goodnes me, Archer needed that. He makes Labuschagne play first ball, then whips through a bouncer that gets up higher. he’s so close to the stumps it can look like the ball follows batters, and his run up is so leisurely it’s always shocking. And here he comes again, the ball moving away form Labuschagne … who edges just short of slip. Has momentum switched? Wicket maiden.
“Plural of anthems has to be anathema in my book,” writes Brian Withington, “capturing my feelings about the vast majority of the miserable/imperialistic dirges. Honourable exceptions include Mae Hen Wlad Fy Nhadau, La Marseillaise and the South African one.”
The old Russian one is a banger, likewise Italy’s, and Spain’s is also decent. But I’d love it for counties to use their own styles of music, so UK having a jungle tune, German electronic, Ghana hi-life, Jamaica reggae and so on.
WICKET! Weatherald c Smith b Archer 18 (Australia 33-1)
Out of nothing, Archer finds his best ball so far, a lifter not getting up above the collar and edged high into the air, the pull misjudged; Smith runs around in his own time and the ball plops into his gloves.
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8th over: Australia 33-0 (Head 10, Weatherald 18) Stokes perseveres with Carse and again, he’s wide, but this time he brings Weatherald down to that level, a horrible hoik missing everything. The next ball is flicked off the toes for one and the final one is forced just over the infield for two; in comms, Matt Prior isn’t happy that there wasn’t a bowling change for this over, and it’s hard to argue with him.
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7th over: Australia 29-0 (Head 8, Weatherald 17) We see a pitch map to incite resigned rage in those of an England disposition; they’ve been far too short far too often so far. Here, though, Archer hustles through a maiden – one that’s not especially threatening but which his team sorely needed/
“The plural of anthem, as an Anglicised Latin Noun, is... anthems,” advises Rowan Sweeney. “Sorry to be a bore, but in atonement, here’s a Mitchell and Webb skit (loosely) on the subject.”
Not at all, I wasn’t denying it’s existence, just disputing its aural pleasure.
6th over: Australia 29-0 (Head 8, Weatherald 17) Er yeah, about that. Carse offers Weatherald width, the ball sits up, and he unloads the suitcase, buggy-whipping a cut, then a similar delivery incites him to go over the field; two fours in two balls. The response is decent, the batter pulling away at the last second when he’s sure it’s bouncing over and past off stump. This track looks like it might need a fuller length, which Tongue can supply, but Carse goes for teeth music again, cleansing Weatherald on the helmet – that’s a third no ball – then the final one of the other is embarrassed to the cover fence for four more. He’s bowled some decent deliveries, but Carse has gone for 24 off three; a sub-elite return, it’s fair to say.
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5th over: Australia 16-0 (Head 8, Weatherald 5) Weatherald'’s cool with hitting the dreadful deliveries and picking up singles when he can, taking one into the on side before Archer goes around and sends Head a bumper; his are so hard to see coming. If Carse can send down a tight one next up, England can build a bit of pressure.
4th over: Australia 15-0 (Head 8, Weatherald 4) Why are some names so good to spoonerise; implore you to spoonerise them? In comes Crydon Barse from around, and after two decent deliveries, he offers one that’s wide, sits up, and smears itself with sprinkles; Head guzzles every last bit of it, thrashing through point for four. A much better delivery follows, full of length, swinging in, aimed at the stumps, then a second no ball before two dots to finish off. Can England build some pressure? So far there’ve been a few decent meteorites, but not enough consecutively.
Cricket Australia on Smith’s absence:
Steve Smith was ruled out of the third Ashes test in Adelaide today. Over the past few days he has been feeling unwell, with symptoms including nausea and dizziness. He was assessed and monitored closely and was close to being available to play. However, given the persistence of symptoms, a decision was made not to proceed. He is being treated for a potential vestibular issue. This is something Steve has experienced intermittently in the past and is being managed accordingly. He is expected to be available for the Boxing Day test in Melbourne.
3rd over: Australia 10-0 (Head 4, Weatherald 4) Head shoves towards mid-off for one, then a leg-bye is followed by another single, before Weatherald misses out on a full toss. Carse looked dangerous in his opening over…
“Plural of anthems,” says Tom Buckley, “Surely it should be anthi?”.
As per the Eddie and the Hot Rods discussion, I’ve not a clue, though this time I don’t have the excuse that I didn’t start it.
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2nd over: Australia 7-0 (Head 2, Weatherald 4) Talking of being out of your element, there’s something that doesn’t feel right about Alastair Cook on the telly not the radio, but in the meantime, Carse is opening from the other end. I guess that’s partly a seniority thing and partly Tongue is less in need of help from the ball to bowl wicket-taking deliveries. Head turns around the corner for one, then Weatherald is caught out by one that nips in, hurriedly playing it into the turf and into himself, narrowly avoiding playing on. Oooh, then a fuller one that tails even more, bouncing and clumping the batter in the gizzard, then a similar delivery that has Carse appealing … it’s a no ball … then one that’s over-pitched is dealt with, a bit step and a twizzle to the midwicket fence for four. We don’t know how long it’ll be around, but the bowlers have some help through the air here.
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1st over: Australia 1-0 (Head 1, Weatherald 0) Two dots, then Head tips and runs for one, the only runs off the over, Archer’s not quite at full pace yet, but he’s not hanging about.
“Eddie and the Hot Rods debut album, ‘Life On The Line’, started with Kim Thonger’s excellent choice of ‘Do Anything You Wanna Do’,” writes Timothy Sanders. “However, the final track was ‘Beginning Of The End’. The lyric comes pessimistically to mind: It’s too late, much too late, the damage is done…"”
I’m so out my element here I make Donnie from Big Lebowski look savvy.
Jofra Archer has the ball. He has to produce here, and everyone knows it. Pressure! Head to face and play…
We’re about ready to go, the England team huddling in the knowledge that their existence as a unit is on the line. Pressure!
Teams
Australia 1 Jake Weatherald, 2 Travis Head, 3 Marnus Labuschagne, 4 Usman Khawaja, 5 Cameron Green, 6 Alex Carey (wk), 7 Josh Inglis, 8 Pat Cummins (c), 9 Mitchell Starc, 10 Nathan Lyon, 11 Scott Boland.
England 1 Zak Crawley, 2 Ben Duckett, 3 Ollie Pope, 4 Joe Root, 5 Harry Brook, 6 Ben Stokes (c), 7 Jamie Smith (wk), 8 Will Jacks, 9 Brydon Carse, 10 Jofra Archer, 11 Josh Tongue.
“So if you’re England,” says Max Williams, “do you take Smith out in exchange for bowling? I guess we’ll know at lunch.”
I don’t have to think about that one: as my dad once said in assembly and as my mates never let me forget, “No, no and no.” If Australia bat well, they could potentially bat England out of the match even if England bowl fairly well.
It’s time for Welcome to Country, then it’ll be the anthems, the plural of which ought really to be antha.
John Williamson is now singing True Blue.
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There’ll now be a moment to reflect on the Bondi murders.
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Michael Vaughan and Jason Gillespie bring out the crystal urn, then the players, who were out already, come out officially, it’s dead exciting, to a soundtrack of 80s muzak.
Is it better going to bed with cricket or waking up to it? I used to prefer the former but now it’s the latter, which I’m only just realising is because I’m old. This may also be the first time I’ve done one of these without a sweet shop in my box room; it’s a state of affairs, mates.
“Pretty sure Eddie and the Hotrods were managed by Talk Talk singer/songwriter Mark Hollis’ older brother, Ed,” says Julian Rolfe. “Anyway, HUGE day for England. Time it’s time for the batters to take some responsibility. Life’s what you make it, chaps, so please don’t say The Party’s over. Dig in. Don’t Give it up so easily. For sure, It’s a shame if the Ashes were to be over in the next couple of days. Ben Stokes and co ... I believe in you!”
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It’s hot out there, so both sides will want to rely on their spinners. Graeme Swann is out on the pitch for TNT, and if I had to pick an England XI of my lifetime, he’s the easiest selection – not just able to hold down an end in the first innings, but to take first-innings wickets – with a bit of help from DRS.
“Will England see sense and drop Pope down to six?” wonders Matthew Tom. “Root taking responsibility at three, Brook a natural at four, Stokes allowed to bat when it’s not (yet) a crisis, and Pope allowed to play without pressure of precipitating a collapse?”
I’d be staggered if England took the best thing about their team and messed with it. They don’t want Root going in early if they can avoid it, but more than that they know he has a strong preference, and wouldn’t want to risk altering his mental equilibrium.
Stokes would’ve batted, so consoles himself that it’s good the whole team will be out there together looking to set things right. Josh Tongue brings, energy, effort and “natural wicket-taking ability”, so he’s looking forward to watching him bowl.
Cummins thinks it’s a good wicket and a regulation Test match on the track. He says Smith has been ill and isn’t right – so not concussed – and Khawaja comes in to bat four. Lyon is a huge asset, preparation has been great, and that is a confident man.
Australia win the toss and bat
Tails, it turns out, does sometimes fail.
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Righto, time for the toss…
“Morning Daniel, (it’s approaching 7am in Western Australia),” opens Karris Evans. “Fox Cricket noted an hour ago that Smith got a head knock in training this morning, so possible concussion has ruled him out.”
Thanks, there it is.
It’ll be an interesting atmosphere in that dressing room. This team haven’t suffered as they are now, and there’s not that much experience there – there’ll be doubts.
Email! “Good evening Daniel,” begins Kim Thonger. “I think what England really need is just a good pre-match dance tune in the dressing room to get them fired up and this might do the trick. I saw Eddie and the Hot Rods perform Do Anything You Wanna Do at Reading Festival in August 1976. Life changing”
Steve Smith is out of the Test
TNT make if official. By the looks of things, Usman Khawaja, who must’ve wondered if he’d ever play Tests again, comes in.
I’m really looking forward to seeing how Josh Tongue goes. As Steve Finn just noted, he’s not bowled terribly, but it always felt that his run early in his Test career wouldn’t translate to this series. And what Tongue has is the ability to bowl unplayable deliveries; whether he can avoid getting clobbered in between remains to be seen.
TNT now go with the same Smith rumour – he didn’t train on Monday, ill, but was back at it yesterday and he appears to be leaving the ground. Real talk, his absence isn’t the seismic one it would’ve been in the sense that he’s not as reliable a scorer these days, but symbolically, he’s a huge figure in the team and match-up.
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Thinking more about the toss, if Australia win the toss and bat, I’d really fear for England. Responding to a big total feels less likely than posting one.
Cricinfo are suggesting that Steve Smith might not be playing. I guess we’ll find out soon whether or not that’s the case.
Preamble
Morning everyone. Ben Stokes’ side arrive at Adelaide having already experienced their very own Adelaide, the catastroexpletive of Perth rivalling the 2006 abomination for the very specific “They did what?! I feel like vomiting up my insides” energy that, for England fans, feels like home.
And yet, and yet, and yet. Despite the current frothing, we’ve seen wonders over the last few years that have changed our conception of the possible and with it the nature of Test-match cricket, the miracles of Bazball no less inspiring now than then. Moreover, it remains the case that England’s is a team full of matchwinners who may now be acclimatised to conditions; if they can get rolling, Australia will start to wonder.
That “if”, though, is of Cameron Green proportions. With Australia already on a buzz, Pat Cummins and Nathan Lyon are returning to play at yet another stronghold; their opponents’ total mental disintegration may be too far advanced to be aborted; and even if not, it’s also possible that there’s an insurmountable skill differential in the conditions that will continue to be definitive.
All of which is a long-winded way of saying this could be over soon … but it absolutely isn’t over yet. Go well, people.
Play: 10am local, 10.30am AEDT, 11.30pm GMT
