And that’s that. Thanks so much for your company this afternoon, far too many of you tuned in, and for that we’re extremely grateful.
Geoff Lemon signing out, and hoping to bring you a little more sporting action and a little less atmospheric soliloquy when next we meet. Keep in touch over that Twitter thing though the World Cup - I’ll be there, for all the games.
And make sure to subscribe to our World Cup podcast, out weekly with the best cricketing guests we can herd into a recording studio. Episode 2 out Tuesday.
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That means that New Zealand heads the pool with 6 points, Aus and Bangladesh are second and third with 3 points, and Sri Lanka is fourth with 0 points. Then it’s Afghanistan, Scotland, and England last thanks to their dire net run rate.
New Zealand have played three games, Australia have only managed one.
In Pool B there are five teams with 2 points: India, West Indies, South Africa, Ireland and Zimbabwe. UAE are yet to register a point, and Pakistan are now last.
Ah, man. We have two hours up our sleeves but the umpires have lost patience.
Play has officially been called off. Well, there was no play. The match has been officially cancelled. No result, one point each for Australia and Bangladesh.
We should also send a shout-out to Virat Kohli for a) finally convincing the Indian media managers to let him do a press conference, and b) showing up in this muscle top.
.@imVkohli puts friendship with @DaleSteyn62 on hold for massive @MCG clash: http://t.co/GRvMsdDttC #cwc15 #INDvSA pic.twitter.com/azkX94FWCZ
— cricket.com.au (@CricketAus) February 21, 2015
That’s it. Someone call Rusbridger. We’re just concentrating on rain from here on.
@GeoffLemonSport I missed the start of the live rain blog. When can I expect a replay/highlights package?
— Cat Jones (@Cricketbatcat) February 21, 2015
Delighted to learn that so many of you have stuck with us throughout this frustrating Australian afternoon, whatever time that may be in your part of the world. We’re also looking at some interesting commercial opportunities.
@GeoffLemonSport Reckon there's a huge opportunity to get sponsors onboard rain as a concept. $70bn bottled water market expected by 2017.
— Brin Paulsen (@brinpaulsen) February 21, 2015
It’s 16:30 local time. That means the final pitch inspection will take place in an hour, and play must commence within two hours for us to have a 20/20 shortened match today. Still some hope, but after notching their first win already the Banglas will happily take a point from a washout.
Excellent, we’re getting a full replay of that New Zealand v England match while we wait. That ought to fill in about 45 minutes.
How do our English readers feel about that result? Blocking it out? I feel almost embarrassed, like when you see someone’s trousers rip open at the supermarket or something and they’re humiliated and you feel some of it on their behalf.
You could have put the result down to unplayable swinging conditions until McCullum came out and battered 70 off about 20 balls.
Could not agree more. And I’m cautious about agreeing with anyone with ‘sax’ in their name. Remember at the end of St Elmo’s Fire how Rob Lowe goes off the catch the bus to New York with his leather jacket on and his un-cased saxophone just slung over his back like some sort of reed-instrument gunslinger? Jesus, Rob Lowe.
@GeoffLemonSport It's mindless that in a competition that goes for 9 months like the CWC they can't just play this game during the week.
— Ross Chapman (@chapsax) February 21, 2015
If you’re bored and downcast, Ben Pobjie has written the funniest article on the World Cup so far.
A request for our correspondent Sam, from Fynbos. What have we got in the locker?
@GeoffLemonSport morning Geoff! If you and Sam Lobascher could cook up a 2000 word rumination on Indoor cricket, today would not be in vain.
— Fynbos umlungu (@RK_ct) February 21, 2015
So I suppose eyes start to turn to what is next. India v South Africa will be big, I think the MCG might be sold out for that. England v Scotland is actually a big game now. Ireland v UAE could be close.
On recent form New Zealand v Australia is the big game of next week though. The Australians have been in form, and the Kiwis have walloped everyone they’ve played but haven’t put down an in-form side. If they can get the ball swinging like they did against England, NZ could beat Australia badly. There aren’t many in that line-up who account for the swinging ball when they play their big drives. If there’s no swing, it’ll be a slog-fest against quality fast bowling. Should be tremendous.
We’ll be covering it, rain permitting.
Shammi Huda writes sweetly, wistfully: “Geoff, If the match is drawn, I’ll happily accept that point & celebrate it. I’m not proud. Anyway, the rain gods owe the bangla nation a few.”
Here in Melbourne, from where I write these words, the afternoon is stifling, the sun is blazing, heavy rain is clumping down and there is thunder gargling in the sky’s throat.
Nowhere in Australia knows what it is doing with itself.
“Surely it’s not beyond us to move the Gabba to Umuwa?” asks Patrick O’Brien.
Personally, these modern players just need to harden up. In my day we played in a boat if we had to. Never heard anyone complain.
How badly does this likely wash-out hurt Australia? This was supposed to be Michael Clarke’s relatively easy path back into top-level cricket. It was also supposed to be the proper test of his hamstrings to see whether they get damaged again.
If doesn’t play today, he has to wait a full week before going straight into a game in Auckland against New Zealand, who are in utterly white-hot form. He has to walk in, having barely played an ODI in a year and a half, and expect to perform at the required standard.
It’s ludicrous.
Get onto that podcast, we discussed the Clarke issue in some detail there.
Nathan Sinclair is continuing to email me, now demanding that we crowd-source me a nickname. Apparently “Geoff” isn’t racy enough for the youth of today.
This is slightly awkward in light of the long essay I wrote last week about commentators talking about themselves too much. But frankly by this point I’m fresh out of alternatives.
Well. I can’t say this looks very promising. Our lonely vigil starts to gutter a little more in the gathering wax.
Sad scene at Gabba turnstiles where water not patrons flooding in. Rain heavier now than for past hour #CWC15 pic.twitter.com/Zyn2YvzFRa
— Andrew Ramsey (@ARamseyCricket) February 21, 2015
In other vaguely cricket-related news, here’s a short response that Glenn McGrath has just posted after old photos emerged of him apparently hunting elephants and other animals some years ago.
Please see my response below pic.twitter.com/GnnrSoPxzY
— Glenn McGrath (@glennmcgrath11) February 21, 2015
Pakistan are bowled out for 160 after 39 overs. That’s a massive defeat by a West Indies side that has at times been a shambles recently. Maqsood made 50, Akmal 59 and Afridi 28, but no one else made more than 7. Tough to come back after this, though at least they’ll have some non-Test teams to face.
Excellent tonic for West Indies, who need to make sure they beat Test-ranked sides after dropping that game to Ireland.
Still working out where we can move the game to. I think David is trying to help?
@geofflemonsport I live in Umuwa - a town of 70 people in the middle of the desert. No rain here - there is also no oval however
— david busuttil (@halfmaltese) February 21, 2015
Don’t get excited if you switch on the TV, this is a replay of Bangladesh versus Afghanistan.
Apparently Brisbane’s rain has upped the ante once more. I might make some toast, do you want some?
Here’s the level of joy in Pakistan, as West Indies search for the last wicket.
@OsmanSamiuddin the guy who invented cricket. Worst ever decision
— Safwan (@Safwan__Ahmed) February 21, 2015
Questions coming in. Nathan Sinclair: “With a surname like Lemon, I’m guessing you didn’t have the easiest time at school? Did you sport any particularly good nicknames?”
Surprisingly no one ever comes up with much that’s any good. “Stop being so... sour!” Bam, pat themselves on the back for hours. These days it’s all down to angry internet commenters who think they’re highly original with “That article was a LEMON,” while the comedy gods cut them a novelty cheque.
Patrick O’Brien: “I’ve always wondered what it’s like to have the boys’ full support.”
Well it’s actually really good for the spine, Patrick. Gives a proper night’s sleep that won’t leave you aching in the morning.
Pakistan 157/9 as Afridi gets out for 28. It took him 26 balls to get there though, so we’d all stopped paying in attention in blind rage once a record half-century was out of the equation.
Australian rain expert Crash Craddock is on the tube saying that rain radars in Brisbane don’t tend to move on as fast as elsewhere. I don’t know if that’s a function of Brisbane rain or of Brisbane radars. He’s tipping it will be a while yet before play might be possible, but 20 overs a side might well be an option later.
What do you reckon? Who was pumped for this game? What were you expecting to happen?
If you want to hear how right we were about some things, and hear our predictions for those yet to come, fill the time with a chat between me, Russell Jackson, the BBC’s Alison Mitchell and Wisden India editor Dileep Premachandran.
First episode of the Guardian World Cup Podcast is a click away.
Or subscribe via iTunes. Episode 2 will be out early next week.
In writes Wendy Cowling, presumably from the Longreach Tourism Board. “Shows you how desperate I am for cricket news that I logged on to see if anything was happening in Brisbane. Like you I don’t understand why no contingency plans had been made to shift to another venue - tho’ Sydney would not have been an option. It hasn’t been raining in Longreach.”
I wouldn’t use the word ‘desperate’, Wendy. We’re all having a nice time here. Aren’t we?
Umar Akmal is out for 59. Pakistan 141/7. Even my Afridi stats may not bring them home this one.
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Writes Kasi Hasan, “We have 2000 mm rainfall in Bangladesh every year. What’s a rain delay?”
I’m glad that Sam Lobascher on email is losing his grip as much as I am.
“I write to you from the rather moist and currently paradoxically named Gold Coast. I once toured Cairns representing the might of the Weipa Junior Cricket Club. It rained pretty much the whole time we were there, so we arranged a few of our matches to be played at indoor cricket centres. Why can’t the ICC slip that into their laws of the game?
Indoor cricket’s s**t, by the way. And the types that play it in suburban warehouse centres are always 100% nuts. Blokes who played in the 5th XI at school and are still clinging to that failed glory. It used to be televised on the ABC, too. I do apologise for the rambling nature of this, but I’m marking Year 11 English narratives, and thus am in a rather weakened intellectual state.”
You and me, Sam. We’ll start a club. An indoor club, perhaps.
One positive of this rain business is I’m sending some pretty hilarious rain jokes to far more dignified sportswriters on the internet.
@SpiceBoxofEarth Might need to if the rain keeps up.
— Geoff Lemon Sport (@GeoffLemonSport) February 21, 2015
@MitchellGlenn Was that at the Gabba?
— Geoff Lemon Sport (@GeoffLemonSport) February 21, 2015
Ah, I kill me.
Or maybe just, kill me. Best for everyone.
Rain updates from outside the Corporo-Fascist Media Industrial Complex. Unless this is some kind of joke.
@geofflemonsport Three of us (an Englishman, an Irishman and an Aussie) waiting near the Gabba in an English pub - still drizzling, sort of
— penny wright (@pennywright) February 21, 2015
The word from the TV studio is that conditions look ok now, the ground staff are out there pottering around, and a few of the players are out there limbering up. This is all very positive for everyone except maybe Bangladesh, who I suspect secretly wouldn’t mind sharing the points from this match without having to play it.
In doing so, that means Shahid Afridi has reached 50 three times off 18 balls, once off 19, twice off 20, three times off 21 and once off 22 balls.
Here is a stat for you.
Of the 40 fastest half-centuries in ODI cricket, Afridi has scored a quarter of them.
Wait, that means Afridi is in. This is excellent.
Maqsood is gone for 50 off 66, and Pakistan are 105/6 chasing 310.
Yeah, nah.
I like the cut of Dr Nick Riviera’s jib.
@GeoffLemonSport They have been talking about this cyclone for a week. Was moving the match ever an option?
— Smozzle (@Shamozzle4) February 21, 2015
Top question. Why is cricket now so inflexible? When it’s a World Cup and everything’s on the line, how can we not manage things like reserve days, or shifting games? Surely we could actually play this tomorrow, or could have arranged to move it three days ago. It’s not like any of the grounds in this tournament are overused, there are only a handful of games at most.
What if this were the last round of games and the result could decide who makes the quarter-finals? C’mon people - don’t bring me problems, bring me solutions.
Also bring me an icy-pole. It’s pretty warm.
In the meantime, Pakistan are getting a pretty righteous flogging from the West Indies, who were just given a flogging by Ireland. So by my maths Ireland are now top of the FIFA rankings and can turn pro before the draft.
The Windies were effectively 194/5 with ten overs to go but bashed their way to 310 in the final exchanges, before coming out and taking the first four Pakistani wickets for one run. Yep. That’s the worst score ever for four wickets in ODIs.
In the meantime, Umar Akmal and Sohaib Maqsood have put on 70-odd runs and the score is now 93/5.
All of which might make England fans feel a bit better.
I’m getting conflicting reports from my learned correspondents in Brisbane on how likely it is we’ll get back on. Who even knows what truth is, in this crazy mixed up modern world? Who can we trust?
@geofflemonsport I live near the Gabba, still raining pretty heavily, hasn't really stopped since Thursday night.
— Ben Newton (@BenNewton_1) February 21, 2015
@GeoffLemonSport Work down the Rd. Still raining, supposed to clear soon...
— mathew willoughby (@Ausbooky) February 21, 2015
Not sure who's saying the weather will clear. Greyer than Manchester in November. #CWC15 #AUSvBAN pic.twitter.com/yHutaUEw8s
— Dileep Premachandran (@SpiceBoxofEarth) February 21, 2015
@GeoffLemonSport hahahahahahahahahahahaha Does that answer it? It's pissing down!
— Roosters - LFC (@J_Corey1) February 21, 2015
@GeoffLemonSport rain's just starting to slow down here on the north side. Been bucketing down for hours mind you.
— EveryDayMan (@Every_Day_Man) February 21, 2015
@GeoffLemonSport Tomorrow would be perfect.
— Peter Grant (@PDG55) February 21, 2015
I’d like to hear from you. If your life is sufficiently rich and exciting that you’re tuning in avidly to a live bog of rain in a city that even the writer isn’t in, then you must have some tales to tell. Oh, those times! When youth thudded boldly through your veins and love bloomed on every springtime branch.
Share with me your stories. Your tender hopes and wisps of dream. Those distant memories that still needle your heart. Your thoughts on modern over rates and what must be done to address them. I want them all.
The Twitter phone is @GeoffLemonSport and the emailgram is geoff.lemon@theguardian.com.
Here’s an interesting point though. Given the rain, it’s almost inevitable we’ll have a reduced match in terms of overs per side. If we have a match at all. It could be a smaller adjustment, like 40 overs a side, or it could come down as low as 20 overs a side.
At which point we’re not playing an ODI, we’re playing a T20 match that counts as an ODI.
With me so far? Good. So, one of Australia’s captains - Michael Clarke - is supposed to make his comeback to the side today. It is widely supposed that he’ll do so in place of another Australian captain, George Bailey. Bailey is a renowned T20 player. Clarke has barely played the format.
He retired from international T20s almost as soon as they were invented, and he’s signed for a couple of T20 franchises but almost never played.
If we have a 20 or 25-over game here, do the team’s needs require Clarke’s comeback be delayed, and the squad’s biggest hitters be played? I reckon so. But can Clarke and his big fans like coach Darren Lehmann handle that?
The plot thickens like precipitation in the north Australian sky.
The teams haven’t been announced, only the squads, because we haven’t had the formalities at the start of play. So I can’t give you any information about that yet, and no toss. Apparently play needs to start within the next five hours for us to have any sort of match into the evening. It’s bang on 13:30 local time now, so let’s all settle in for the ride.
Look, let’s have some good news. For one thing, the Gabba has the greatest drainage of any ground in the known galaxy. I was there for the first Ashes Test in 2013 when we had a mid-afternoon storm so thorough that it dumped about a ton of ice all over the field, but within an hour the groundstaff had play back on in late afternoon sunshine. The outfield is never covered but given a slight breather it barely remains damp. So if the rain stops, we’re a great chance to see some play.
The other point is that rain is predicted to stop this afternoon. Or so say those in the know. Here’s the Bureau of Meteorology rain radar, and this storm is heading south. See Brisbane peeking its head above the top of the swirl?
Hello world. Geoff Lemon with you as we look toward the usually sunny Queensland capital of Brisbane, where instead today thick stormclouds swirl and bluster. There has been an obscene amount of rain in Queensland in recent days, and it came as no surprise that it has continued into today, deluging the Gabba ground where Australia and Bangladesh so hope to play out a World Cup match. If they do get on the field, it could be a pool match in more ways than one.
Bring my drumkit.
Geoff will be here shortly to guide you through events at the Gabba, but in the meantime, here’s what Mitchell Johnson thinks of the story that has got a nation talking this week.
I love the captaincy that he [Clarke] brings. He has got so much experience and George [Bailey] does as well. But Michael Clarke has been the captain for a number of years now. I know he has the boys’ full support.
Read the full story here.
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