For a world shackled by a pandemic, there's sure been a lot of movement at the Great Southern station.
This movement doesn't involve me or anyone else I know, as I thought travel - especially international - was fairly restricted.
Space travel's the exception. Tickets are readily available through Massive Ego Flights. Ask for Bezos or Branson and have your credit card ready.
While many in Australia have to think twice about whether they can leave their suburbs, I was surprised to hear of the ease with which a select few were able to fly in ... and out.
The first arrival was "American socialite" Caitlyn Jenner. I copied her description from Wikipedia as I have no idea what her job is, besides having a connection with the Kardashian family, whose members' occupations are also unclear.
Jenner is holed up somewhere in Great Southern quarantine waiting for a star turn on Big Brother or something. Writing that almost put me in a coma, so I'll move on.
The next arrival was again linked to Big Brother, but she was worth staying awake for as she put on a good show.
No-one in Australia had heard of Katie Hopkins (Wiki description: media personality) until she suddenly arrived like a bad smell on a flight from hell. She proved so obnoxious that Barnaby Joyce had to step in.
Before turning the blow-torch on Hopkins, Joyce reminded Australia that he was the one who told Johnny Depp and Amber Herd to bugger off home with their biohazard terriers, Pistol and Boo.
She proved so obnoxious that Barnaby Joyce had to step in.
Like a boss, bouncer Joyce told the big-mouth Brit to "pack your bongos" and bugger off. Possibly in a first for Joyce, Australia was 100 per cent behind him. Hopkins (my description: far-right wrong 'un) was escorted to departures.
We are lucky in this country, as we have firm back-up if Joyce loses his celebrity whispering powers.
Second in line is young Aussie hero Will Connolly, aka Egg Boy. He's a cracker when it comes to dealing with ratbags, especially racists.
In other movements, Annastacia Palaszczuk flew to Tokyo so she could leap from her seat when the IOC confirmed that BrisVegas 2032 was a goer. It's not clear who's manning Queensland's borders while she is away as Barnaby's got his hands full running Australia's VIP quarantine.
Palaszczuk flew out of Oz with all guns blazing, practically yelling at reporters that nothing was going to stand in the way of Brisbane's "time to shine".
No one had the heart to remind her of World Expo 88.
I'm not aware of any other big movements in the Great Southern arrivals and departures hall. If you get wind of any, let me know and I'll alert Barnaby "Bongos" Joyce.
