The final word comes from my OBO colleague Tim de Lisle:
“Stranded in Dubai without a telly, but the OBO is a treat. Cook cruising to a hundred, Smith dropping a catch, Aussies reduced to bowling dry, Withington, Copestake and Naylor writing dry. Good point from Gary about the up-country games, but he is neglecting one thing: you can only have old-school touring if you also put up with old-school parenting. By the end of a five-month tour, the little Cooks and Root wouldn’t know who their dads were.”
Close of play: England trail by 132 runs
57th over: England 192-2 (Cook 104, Root 49) That was a heartwarming end to a fine day’s play for England. David Warner walks straight up to shake Cook’s hand, and the fans of both teams applaud him off the field. England took seven Australian wickets for 83 and then scored 192 for two. There is still work to do, because batting last will be very tricky, but they are in a fine position. Thanks for your company, goodnight!
Could have done with it earlier, but great efforts by Broad and Cook today, because if the scoreboard said Aus 551-6d, Eng 61 all out, people sure wouldn't be saying, "Well, it's a dead rubber."
— Gary Naylor (@garynaylor999) December 27, 2017
Updated
ALASTAIR COOK MAKES HIS 32ND TEST HUNDRED!
Cook rushes to a century in the last over of the day! Wonderful stuff. He whipped a full toss from Steve Smith for four to move to 97, scampered two into the leg side and then pulled another boundary to prompt a massive roar from the Barmy Army.
This is a lovely moment. His celebration is modest, proud and full of relief. He is a man with abnormal levels of mental strength and dignity, a Gary Cooper for the iGeneration. Balls to neutrality: I’m thoroughly chuffed for him. He becomes only the second overseas batsman, after Sunil Gavaskar, to score a Test hundred at all five main Australian venues.
Updated
56th over: England 181-2 (Cook 93, Root 49) I don’t think Cook is going to reach his hundred tonight, though I doubt he’ll need a sleeping pill when he gets back to the hotel.
55th over: England 180-2 (Cook 92, Root 49) A single from Cook brings up the hundred partnership between England’s two most experienced players. It’s late, but it’s better than never.
54th over: England 179-2 (Cook 91, Root 49) A rare piece of filth from Lyon is pulled firmly for four by Root, who is one away from an excellent fifty.
53rd over: England 175-2 (Cook 91, Root 45) This is Cummins’ tenth over, which is some effort given the state of gastrointestinal tract. Cook digs out a yorker and then times a boundary down the ground to move into the nineties. He has played some immaculate straight drives today.
Apropos nothing, this video makes me happy.
52nd over: England 171-2 (Cook 87, Root 45) Lyon gets one to turnb sharply and find the edge of Cook’s bat, with the ball falling just short of the diving Smith at slip.
“Can’t help thinking that if this tour followed an “old’ itinerary, we’d be saying that Cook and Root had each got through a slowish start in the upcountry games and these knocks were a nice little sign that they were finding their feet ready for the first Test in a fortnight’s time,” says Gary Naylor.
51st over: England 168-2 (Cook 86, Root 43) A short ball from Cummins is pulled round the corner for four by Root. There isn’t much happening for Australia, bar an occasional bit of reverse swing, and an unforced error looks by far the most likely source of a wicket before the close.
50th over: England 164-2 (Cook 86, Root 39) Sunil Gavaskar is the only visiting batsman to score a Test century at each of Australia’s five main venues. Cook is 14 runs away from joining him.
Updated
49th over: England 158-2 (Cook 85, Root 34) The queasy Cummins drags himself into one last spell. He has been a master of the timely wicket in this series, most notably when he bowled Dawid Malan late on the fourth day at Adelaide. His first over goes for seven, all to Cook, with a pair or twos followed by a lovely push through extra cover for three. On BT Sport, Michael Slater makes the point that Cook, who has been hanging on grimly all series, looks like he’s enjoying batting and scoring runs again.
48th over: England 151-2 (Cook 78, Root 34) “Catch” shouts somebody as Root funnels Lyon into the leg side for a couple. We haven’t seen a replay but I suspect they were crying wolf.
47th over: England 149-2 (Cook 78, Root 32) Hazlewood is getting good reverse swing back into Root, who is playing it straight in more ways than one. If England see off this spell they have every chance of being two down at the close.
Updated
46th over: England 144-2 (Cook 74, Root 31) Just as it was premature to say Cook was finished, so it would now be premature to say he is BACK. But it’s been a fine, comfortingly familiar innings.
45th over: England 142-2 (Cook 73, Root 30) Cook and Root have played with impressive commonsense, minimising risk against the Hazlewood and Lyon in particular. Root misses an attempted pull at a leg-side bouncer from Hazlewood, prompting an optimistic appeal for caught behind. Not aaaht.
44th over: England 140-2 (Cook 73, Root 28) The over-rate is hopeless, as usual, so I doubt we will get the full 90 overs even with an extra half-hour. Lyon has switched around the wicket to Root, with a slip, leg slip and short leg. Root pushes a single into the off side off the fifth ball.
“Just catching up on coverage after a longer than intended winter’s nap (whilst it has snowed heavily outside),” says Brian Withington. “Nice to see that England for once demolished the Aus tail as quickly as they regularly sweep through ours. Haven’t done the numbers but I think that has been a distinguishing feature of the series (... and Smith’s batting ... and Lyon’s bowling... and anything else I’ve missed).”
43rd over: England 139-2 (Cook 73, Root 27) Root thick-edges Hazlewood short of slip and away for four. Cook is beaten later in the over, drawn towards a beautiful reverse outswinger from around the wicket.
42nd over: England 134-2 (Cook 73, Root 22) Root takes a dodgy single to mid-on and is relieved to see Cummins’ throw whistle wide of the stumps. That would have been tight.
41st over: England 132-2 (Cook 72, Root 21) Hazlewood, the go-to guy in this weakened Aussie attack, returns in place of Bird. He starts with a maiden to Root, who bottom-edges a flashing stroke well short of slip.
40th over: England 132-2 (Cook 72, Root 21) Nathan Lyon replaces Mitchell Marsh (4-0-17-0) and is slapped through the covers for four by Cook. That’s the lot.
“I’m stuck in Oregon (which happens to be OK for evening OBO) and compiling votes from listeners for the Show’s Festive 51, like John Peel did, while checking OBO,” says Zaph Mann. “So far leading Aussie vote getter is Jen Cloher with the appropriate ‘Analysis Paralysis’. Not sure who’s ahead of English acts but The Fall do have a track ‘Nine out of Ten’ which Nathan Lyon would love.”
Updated
39th over: England 128-2 (Cook 68, Root 21) Australia are bowling dry. England are batting dry. The runs have thus started to dry up. Australia know that one wicket could bring two or three, so there’s no reason to worry yet. They are still favourites to win this game, superbly though England have played today.
38th over: England 127-2 (Cook 67, Root 21) Marsh sprays one down the leg side for four byes. Thanks very much. That’s drinks.
37th over: England 121-2 (Cook 66, Root 20) Bird continues, and continues to look relatively innocuous. We’ll surely see Nathan Lyon pretty soon.
36th over: England 120-2 (Cook 66, Root 19) Australia have a subcontinental field, with lots of men on the drive on either side of the wicket. It’s an interesting game tactically, and for once that’s not a euphemism.
35th over: England 117-2 (Cook 66, Root 16) Root helps himself to seven runs from two Bird deliveries, with a steer to the third-man boundary followed by a clip through midwicket. Cook survives an LBW appeal off the last ball of the over. It was angled in from around the wicket and would have missed leg stump. There are still 23 overs remaining today. If England are two down at the close they will be in a fine position. But they really need to get their runs in the first innings.
34th over: England 110-2 (Cook 66, Root 9) Cook is dropped by Smith! He drove outside off stump at Marsh and edged to slip where Smith spilled a sharp chance by his right ankle. He was very fine, with Paine up to the stumps, and might have seen it late.
Updated
33rd over: England 104-2 (Cook 60, Root 9) Jackson Bird replaces Josh Hazlewood. His first ball is a gentle inswinger that is driven sweetly by Root into the stumps at the non-striker’s end. Two from the over, a single apiece.
32nd over: England 102-2 (Cook 59, Root 8) Mitch Marsh replaces Pat Cummins (7-0-23-0). He can look innocuous but has dismissed some good players in his Test career, including Cook and Root. Cook looks in formidable touch today, however, and gets four more with a sweetly timed push down the ground.
31st over: England 96-2 (Cook 53, Root 8) Root, feeling with soft hands at Hazlewood, edges along the ground for his first boundary. England are playing sensible, low-risk cricket against the reverse-swinging ball. It’s a quietly intriguing passage of play.
30th over: England 92-2 (Cook 53, Root 4) Cook flicks Cummins for four to reach an excellent fifty, at once stylish and purposeful. His ability to bat time, and inability to get bored, make him England’s most important player in this developing game of patience.
“Interesting to note that no old pro ever ever ever missed an inside edge,” says Lee Rodwell. “ You know, those inside edges that aren’t visible even on super slo-mo, but are just about detectable with both snicko and hot spot. And those old pros who retired before snicko and hot spot: infallible they were! Cricket commentary is generally pretty high-quality (compared to football at least), but the post hoc explanations are always quite something. A ball that takes a wicket is an unplayable yorker, but the same one that goes to the boundary is a rank long-hop, that sort of thing.”
29th over: England 88-2 (Cook 49, Root 4) Root drives Hazlewood for a couple to get off the mark. He needs to be careful that his head doesn’t fall over to the off side; he was out twice to the inswinger at Brisbane. After a flying start from England, scoring is becoming harder.
28th over: England 84-2 (Cook 49, Root 0) This is admirable stuff from Cummins, who is clearly unwell. A lot of fast bowlers would be off the field in this situation. Perhaps Steve Smith called him a “weak New South Welshman” at tea. Anyway, Cook works a couple to leg to move within one of his first fifty of the series.
27th over: England 82-2 (Cook 47, Root 0) Root has nought from 13 balls. He usually likes to counter-attack at the start of an innings but today he looks like he wants to bat time rather than bat runs.
26th over: England 81-2 (Cook 46, Root 0) Root, trying to turn a Cummins outswinger to leg, gets a leading edge back down the pitch. These are dangerous times for England, with the ball reversing just enough to make things awkward.
Here’s Ian Copestake. “Getting out to a sick Cummins would be like when a local side gives a child a chance to bowl and you are the one to face the nervous sod first, once the rules have been explained again.”
25th over: England 80-2 (Cook 45, Root 0) Rightly or wrongly, that dismissal will reinforce the perception that Vince is a bit too accident-prone to succeed at Test level. He didn’t feel that thin inside edge, which apparently is pretty unusual. I say apparently because my cricketing career did not hit the heights. In truth, it didn’t hit the lows.
The new batsman is Joe Root, who plays out the last five balls of a wicket maiden. With the ball reverse-swinging, Hazlewood will be really dangerous in this session. He could blow the game open.
WICKET! England 80-2 (Vince LBW b Hazlewood 17)
Josh Hazlewood, Australia’s best reverse-swinger, comes into the attack - and he strikes first ball! It was a full delivery that shaped back into Vince, who drove outside the line and was plumb LBW. At least that’s how it seemed. Hotspot suggests Vince got an inside edge, yet he didn’t review. How strange.
Updated
24th over: England 80-1 (Cook 45, Vince 17) Pat Cummins starts after tea, though his facial expression suggests his insides are still behaving as if in a frat movie. His second ball is short and slammed through midwicket for four by Cook. Shot! This is now his highest score in 11 Test innings since the 243 against West Indies at Edgbaston. Cook ends the over with an even better shot, a majestic back-foot drive to the extra-cover boundary. He is playing brilliantly.
Tea
23rd over: England 72-1 (Cook 37, Vince 17) Vince plays his first loose stroke, chasing a wide one from Bird and edging it for four. Bird’s workhorsery will be important in the final session, particularly if Cummins is unable to bowl. He is on his haunches, looking as healthy asa student at a Saturday-morning lecture. Vince steers the last ball for a couple to complete an interesting session, which ends with England trailing by 255. See you in 15 minutes for more of the same.
Updated
22nd over: England 66-1 (Cook 37, Vince 11) With most of the seamers looking ill or ineffective, Steve Smith can at least rely on Nathan Lyon to control things from one end. He bowls another maiden to Cook and has figures of 8-2-19-1.
21st over: England 66-1 (Cook 37, Vince 11) Bird is definitely getting a bit of movement back into Vince, which I suspect is reverse swing. If England are to take a first-innings lead it could some time, which makes Cook’s innings even more important.
20th over: England 64-1 (Cook 36, Vince 10)
19th over: England 62-1 (Cook 34, Vince 10) Vince survives an LBW appeal from Bird on the ground that it wasn’t out. Bird follows up with consecutive no-balls, but it’s actually a promising over for Australia because there are the first signs of reverse swing. It ends with Vince surviving an appeal for a catch down the leg side. Smith doesn’t review; replays suggest it hit the thigh pad.
18th over: England 57-1 (Cook 31, Vince 10) Vince plays the most gorgeous extra-cover drive for four off Lyon. Honestly, that was as near to perfection as dammit. Cummins is back on the field, but he still doesn’t look right and the Australian camp have confirmed he has an upset stomach. Reports that he had too much of grandpa’s special sprouts on Christmas Day are unconfirmed.
“Ah, Ravi Bopara,” says Lee Rodwell. “Perhaps my favourite not-quite-an-England-regular of all-time (and he certainly should have played more limited-overs stuff during the period he was one of the few Englishmen holding his own in the IPL). Is there are any word on whether Andy Bull ever got the Pulitzer he deserved for this scoop?”
Erm, can I phone a friend.
Updated
17th over: England 53-1 (Cook 31, Vince 6) Cook slams a back cut for four off Bird. He is playing really well. It helps that Starc and Cummins aren’t on the field, and there’s almost - almost - a 2010-11 feel to his innings so far. I’d be inordinately happy if he got a hundred today, because the lack of respect shown towards him by many people during this series has been pretty appalling.
“So glad when I paid squillions to fly to Australia in 2006 that the MCG was a much spicier pitch,” says Rachel Clifton. “Even though we got crushed in that Test. Is cricketing PTSD a thing?”
It is now!
16th over: England 49-1 (Cook 27, Vince 6) Vince swaggers down the track to chip Lyon over mid-on for two. He didn’t get hold of it but it was a safe shot and a nice statement of intent. Vince has played Lyon better than anyone in this series. Lyon the bowler, that is. He’s had problems with Lyon the fielder.
Vince is the only batsman in England's top five yet to be dismissed by Lyon in this series. His boundary percentage of 6.77% against him is higher than all batsmen to have faced at least 10 balls #Ashes
— The Cricket Prof. (@CricProf) December 27, 2017
Updated
15th over: England 46-1 (Cook 26, Vince 4) Bird replaces Cummins, who looked a bit nauseous as he left the field. Cook times a superb boundary down the ground, his fourth of the innings. England are going at a decent rate, which is important because, as the BT Sport chaps have just pointed out, it will became a lot harder to score as the ball gets older. This feels more like an Adelaide pitch.
14th over: England 41-1 (Cook 21, Vince 4) Vince gets off the mark in style, swishing Lyon through extra cover for four. His talent is tantalisingly close to fulfilment at Test level. Imagine what an MCG hundred would do for his career.
13th over: England 36-1 (Cook 20, Vince 0) A quiet over from Cummins, who has yet to rev up. It’s an important innings from James Vince, this, after he batted so beautifully in the second innings at Perth. He probably needs at least one more fifty to stay in the team next summer.
Sitting at my gate in Brisbane waiting to fly to Perth and thought they were showing Wimbledon on TV. Looked closer and realized it was cricket 🤦🏼♀️
— Genie Bouchard (@geniebouchard) December 27, 2017
12th over: England 35-1 (Cook 19, Vince 0) “Hi, Rob,” says Sarah Bacon. “Maybe because it’s snowing (has been for almost three hours), or rather, because Australia’s providing England with a taste of delicious possibility, but this brutal white morning sees me totting up Stuff I Hate. This collection is not exhaustive, but first off the rank is: (1) Fist bumps between cricket batsmen (especially after garnering opportunistic singles). Yuck. I also don’t like bum-branding on rugby shorts, but the fist thingie is worse. At least this morning, it is. Not that I resent England’s performance this morning. You guys definitely needed a boost, and the performances this AM have been hearteningly reminiscent of something glorious in your past. Bless. Keep it up.”
If there was ever a moment when I was truly happy on this earth, it was surely when Ravi Bopara briefly reintroduced the chappish handshake.
WICKET! England 35-1 (Stoneman ct and b Lyon 15)
Nathan Lyon takes another cracking catch off his own bowling! Stoneman went down the pitch and attempted to flick the ball to leg. He got a leading edge that flew back towards Lyon, who extended a telescopic right arm above his head to take a superb reaction catch. He plucked that almost nonchalantly, yet it was a very tough catch.
Updated
11th over: England 35-0 (Cook 19, Stoneman 15) That’s a lovely stroke from Cook, a thumping cover drive for four off Cummins. That might be his best shot of the series. He has looked good so far, and has regained the feeling in his front foot.
“John Starbuck wanted Christmas songs,” says Mac Millings. “John Starbuck’s getting Christmas songs.
- Geoffrey “Little Drummer” Boycott
- Feliz Miandad
- The Holly and the IVA Richards
- Happy Christ(Mark Waugh is Over)
- Dennis Amisstletoe and Wine
- All I Want for Christmas is You-vraj
- Santa Claus is Pat Cummins to Town
- It’s the Most Wonderful Time of Mike Beer
- Merv Hughes They Know It’s Christmas?
- Albie (Morkel) Home for Christmas
- When John Childs is Born.”
10th over: England 29-0 (Cook 13, Stoneman 15) I missed the 8th over, because I am an idiot. It was bowled by Lyon and suggested he might be a significant influence today, even though there was no real turn. His second over is a decent one too, with a couple of runs from it and plenty of hyperbolic oohs and aahs from Tim Paine.
9th over: England 27-0 (Cook 12, Stoneman 14) Afternoon. Hello. Merry Christmas. Even at this early stage, England are in serious danger of making a game of this. Pat Cummins replaces Jackson Bird (3-2-5-0) and starts around the wicket to Stoneman, who takes a single into the off side. This might be a game of patience for Australia until the ball gets older and starts to reverse.
@collinsadam Regarding Kat's tweet at 0252, I would suggest that 1927 was originally engraved because that's when Bradman made his First Class debut and someone got their facts mixed up.
— Phil Makepeace (@SurreyPhil) December 27, 2017
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7th over: England 23-0 (Cook 11, Stoneman 11) A quick single from Cook, dashing down the other end like a man a decade younger. Good to see. Stoneman does the same to the very next ball. Good running is good cricket. As is the dive from Lyon at backward point. Cook hit that well enough to get four if not for the spinner’s outstretched arm. He needn’t worry about it though, to finish the over Hazlewood dished him up a short ball on his body, pulled with authority through square leg. Vintage Cook!
A nice moment to leave it on. You have the mighty Rob Smyth for the rest of the day. Thanks for your friendly company. I’ll catch you again on morning four.
6th over: England 17-0 (Cook 6, Stoneman 10) Bird sends down a maiden to Stoneman. He’s forced to play at each of the deliveries, even if a couple of those end up hitting his thigh pad. But when he does get bat on ball, they are pinging nicely. His day?
After two overs, Bird's average speed is 134.57kph, slower than all of England's seamers besides Curran (131.52kph) #Ashes
— The Cricket Prof. (@CricProf) December 27, 2017
5th over: England 17-0 (Cook 6, Stoneman 10) A fast bouncer from Hazlewood at Cook. He’s never bowled quicker than what he has since the Adelaide Test a few weeks ago. Not sure what has changed, but he’s found something. Cook helped it fine for one, I should add. Stoneman keeps the strike with the same shot from another shorter one to finish the over. Into double figures.
If I'm not mistaken, the prize for taking a catch with the XXXX Gold hat on is $10k.
— Stuart Fazakerley ☝️👌 (@stuartfaz) December 27, 2017
The fine for unauthorised access to the MCG field is $8k.
Run on, take one in slips and make $2k?
4th over: England 15-0 (Cook 5, Stoneman 9) Ooooh yeah. That’s a drive to get you purring, Stoneman leaning into a Bird half-volley. The quick then oversteps. Good to see it called on the field. The Curran episode yesterday was also a reminder of how many are probably bowled but not signalled. Defends the rest. Nathan Lyon wins the love of the Olympic Stand fans in front of us here when returning a beach ball to them at the end of the over.
3rd over: England 10-0 (Cook 5, Stoneman 5) Big Josh loads up again. Two to Stoneman through midwicket to begin. Then a slightly odd moment, the batsman backing away very late with the bowler already in his stride, so he delivers it anyway. Fair enough. Still at Stoneman then, who drives through cover for three. Bit going on here. And that continues, Cook nailing a glorious clip to the rope. “Absolutely fantastic shot,” observes Chris Rogers on ABC radio. Timed so well that it defeated the fielder, who only had about 15 metres to move.
Yesterday, only three of 38 cross-batted shots (cuts, pulls, hooks) drew edges. Today there has been 12 shots played, four of them drawing edges, including three that have resulted in wickets #Ashes
— The Cricket Prof. (@CricProf) December 27, 2017
2nd over: England 1-0 (Cook 1, Stoneman 0) Bird is the word (sorry) from the Members End. His first appearance for Australia since this fixture last year. He did everything right during his previous stint in the XI, shuffled out in favour of spin in Sydney and the subcontinent, where Cummins made himself indispensable alongside Starc and Hazlewood for the three Tests so far. But with Starc out injured, he gets another chance. He’s testing Cook immediately, moving the ball off the seam back towards the left-hander from over the wicket. Cook then nearly chops on! Would have been the fourth to go that way today. All told, a probing maiden.
@collinsadam On the subject of the MCG and accurate numbers, I take this question to the good folk of the OBO. https://t.co/0hh77ZacAp
— a most poor woman and a stranger (@byekitty) December 27, 2017
1st over: England 1-0 (Cook 1, Stoneman 0) I had that wrong, it’ll be Cook to face. Leading edge second ball gets them oohing and aahing in the stands. Off the mark next ball with a push to midwicket. Quick survey on how many are in from the Melbourne folk around me. I say 57,000. John Pierek from The Age reckons 60,000. Geoff Lemon has it at 62,000. It’s a great tradition of MCG regulars that we all claim to know how many are in the ground at all times. A nice close leave from Stoneman later in the over. Could be said he played and missed, but I’ll give him the benefit of the doubt. Lovely seed. Then the final ball takes off, gloved head high by the ‘keeper Paine.
While we wait, those emails.
“Great Warner interview.” Thanks, Bob Wilson. “I’d read it before but it was a nice revisit. Keep the rest of it for an end of the career special because the big ship certainly shifted. And you’re right that it does mean there have been two of him. Yesterday’s ton happened because he wanted it. You see that sometimes and it’s always unmistakable. And we shouldn’t forget that wanting doesn’t much register on the Richter scale normally. Everybody always wants everything. But something in the nature or weight of Warner’s wanting has shifted. It’s what silly (and rather right wing) folks mean when they talk about someone imposing their will. There’s no such thing as will. The subconscious is a grammarless beast. There is only desire. And he’s got a lot of that.”
There’s a passage about indigenous affairs that is especially good. Personally, I think he’ll end up in parliament. Who for? Anyone’s guess.
Ben Parker says the Warner interview landed him with a (very good) Adil Radhid piece from the same parish. “It is rather puzzling that Rashid wasn’t included in the Ashes squad. Your thoughts?”
I hadn’t thought about it until reading that. But Moeen, gee, what can you say?
On that topic. “Can’t help but question the timing of the decision to give Ali the ball on both occasions,” argues Sachin Paul. “Root got Broad off and Ali proceeded to settle in Shaun Marsh. Same thing happened with Paine. Can’t see what’s wrong with rotating the 4 pacers around all the time.”
I said it was a job well done. By the quicks, that is. Moeen, once again, really battled.
“Typical England,” laments Paul Griffin. “Stable door now being slammed shut with efficiency and elan. Equine occupant having long since decamped.” True, that.
Lastly, Peter Rowntree got into the festive spirit, answering the shout out for songs that John Starbuck asked for. “How about ‘I’m dreaming of a Craig White Xmas’, and ‘the Hollies and the Ivy’.” I think it is a rule that Craig White needs to be mentioned on the OBO at least once a Test Match. The original (obviously not) 90mph man.
That’ll do us. England are out there. Stoneman to face up. Josh Hazlewood to do the honours in the absence of Mitchell Starc. From the Great Southern Stand End.
AUSTRALIA ALL OUT 327! Lyon lbw Anderson 0.
Australia have lost 7-for-67 and are all out 20 minutes after lunch on day two. Lyon sends the decision upstairs, but only because he has to with that spare review. It’s very out, the no. 11 missing a straight one trying to flick across the line. Anderson finishes with three to go with Broad’s four. A job well done.
118th over: Australia 327-9 (Hazlewood 1, Lyon 0) Hazlewood beaten by Broad this time, trying to hit the cover off it through the covers. Good stop from Curran at backward point when he does make contact. A maiden. We’re treading water now.
I mentioned Ian Harvey on the OBO before lunch. His 17-year-old nephew having a frolic for the Australian U19s down the road from the ‘G. Was playing first team cricket at age 13. Prodigy.
Meanwhile, Mackenzie Harvey is 135 not out 10 minutes down the road at the Albert Ground against Pakistan for the Aus under 19s. Just slog swept a ball into the Alfred!
— Tom Morris (@tommorris32) December 27, 2017
117th over: Australia 327-9 (Hazlewood 1, Lyon 0) Anderson gets one past Hazlewood’s outstretched blade early in the over. Holds his nerve, taking one later in the set to midwicket to get off the mark and keep the strike.
Turns out Broad didn’t need to bowl faster, he needed to bowl better.
— Peter Miller (@TheCricketGeek) December 27, 2017
116th over: Australia 326-9 (Hazlewood 0, Lyon 0) Very nearly finished them off with the last ball of the over, beating Lyon with one that jagged away off the seam. Matter of time now. A fair few emails lobbed in during the lunch break. I’ll come to those at the change of innings.
England have finally dismissed Pat Cummins for under 41
— Will Macpherson (@willis_macp) December 27, 2017
WICKET! Cummins c Cook b Broad (Australia 326-9)
Driving lavishly at the second ball of the session, Cummins had edged Broad to Cook at first slip. They go upstairs to make sure that he caught it cleanly. He has. Broad has four with four balls left in the over at Lyon to claim himself a bag of five.
Broad two wickets away from me doing some retweets of people slagging him off. Excited.
— Peter Miller (@TheCricketGeek) December 27, 2017
Updated
They’re back. It’s Broad to Cummins to begin. From the southern end. Go!
LUNCH: Australia 326-8
115th over: Australia 326-8 (Cummins 4, Hazlewood 0) If England get another wicket in this over the session will be extended and I’ll have to plug in my computer. But he’s bowling to Cummins, who is solid as they come. He grabs a single to keep the strike when they return from lunch.
Joe Root will be thrilled with their work this morning. Sure, three of the five wickets to fall were chopped on, but That’s Blockbusters. 5-for-82 was the overall damage.
It looked a long way from going down that path early on with Smith doing largely as he pleased. But just after his stand with Shaun Marsh reached 100, he was the first to drag a ball back onto his woodwork, from Curran’s second offering of the morning. Not a bad first scalp in Test cricket.
Mitch Marsh followed in identical circumstances off Woakes’ fourth ball of the day. His older brother was in fine touch moroting beyond 50 until Broad became the third bowler to strike within an over of returning to the attack with a nice little indipper.
Paine also looked fantastic, until he pulled Anderson off a bottom edge back. That was in his first over back as well, come to think of it. When Broad struck Bird in front, the session was very much England’s. Time for a feed. I’ll be back shortly.
Today's morning session brought to you by pic.twitter.com/dLTxGf8Xij
— Gary Naylor (@garynaylor999) December 27, 2017
Updated
WICKET! Bird lbw b Broad 4 (Australia 325-8)
Oh yes, that’s very out. Bird has reviewed, but I’m not going to dignify that with a second post. Three reds from a ball that jagged back off the seam and trapped him on the crease. The best bit was Broad giving it the big fist pump before he even looked around at the umpire. A fantastic session for England. Broad has 26-8-51-3. Probably not cooked, then.
114th over: Australia 325-8 (Cummins 3, Hazlewood 0).
113th over: Australia 322-7 (Cummins 0, Bird 4). Should be two in the over, Anderson winning Bird’s outside edge but Bairstow unable to get a glove to it moving to his right. Only McGrath sits ahead of Anderson for quicks on the all-time charts now, in fifth place overall.
Cricket Australia has a very, very, very good story to tell. pic.twitter.com/5WJ5PVcSsk
— Geoff Lemon Sport (@GeoffLemonSport) December 27, 2017
WICKET! Paine b Anderson 24 (Australia 318-7)
Another chop on! Three in the session! Paine drags Anderson back off the bottom edge when attempting to pull the champion quick. With that wicket, his 520th, Jimmy overtakes Courtney Walsh.
112th over: Australia 318-6 (Paine 24, Cummins 0). “It is mystifying that Moeen Ali was on for so long,” says Simon Katich as Broad goes again from the southern end. It’s just about the best over of the morning, a maiden that easily could have been a wicket maiden had an away swinger to Cummins been just a fraction closer to the outside edge or off-stump. What England would give for another before lunch.
111th over: Australia 318-6 (Paine 24, Cummins 0). Jimmy back for another go before lunch too. It doesn’t change Paine’s approach, flogging a ball that isn’t that short really, racing to the midwicket rope. He hasn’t played a false stroke yet. Defends the rest as Anderson finds his length. Such good batting.
WICKET! Marsh lbw Broad 61 (Australia 314-6)
Stuart Broad Reviews Correctly! What a world! To be fair, it is hard to see how that was given not out initially, a full delivery coming back at the batsman. Perhaps a concern with the inside edge, but DRS shows there wasn’t one of those. Three reds, Marsh is gone. England have a third for the morning. Excellent bowling from Broad to get the ball moving back from over the wicket, too.
110th over: Australia 314-6 (Paine 20, Cummins 0).
109th over: Australia 314-5 (S Marsh 61, Paine 20). Shooooot. Once again, Paine dominating the ball through the covers off Curran. Into the 20s with the best drive we’ve seen this morning.
Is England's problem a misconception of fast-medium bowling @collinsadam? SF Barnes was not a reined in version of Harold Larwood, so shouldn't we be seeing cutters, slower balls, yorkers, lobs (okay, not lobs) but more imagination from the old pros, not just the debutant?
— Gary Naylor (@garynaylor999) December 27, 2017
Must say, I did love seeing the Ian Harvey Slower Ball get a go yesterday from Curran. In his first spell too.
108th over: Australia 308-5 (S Marsh 60, Paine 15). They have shown Moeen respect so far today, but not this time. To begin, Paine climbs into a lavish cover drive. He’s in wonderful touch early on here. A beautiful boundary. Marsh ends the over on the advance, reaching the delivery on the full and hammering it past the bowler for four more. He’s conceded 57 runs in 12 overs. Yuk.
107th over: Australia 299-5 (S Marsh 56, Paine 10). Curran on for another twist. He’s a decent yard slower than the others in this quartet, highlighted early in the over by his short ball that dies before reaching Paine. He gets down the other end via a push down the ground. A slower ball finishes the set, Marsh missing out as it is down the legside. Watching the replay, he didn’t pick it at all. Expect another one soon.
106th over: Australia 298-5 (S Marsh 56, Paine 9). Singles for both, Marsh cutting to point then Paine driving in the same general direciton. The former respects the rest of Moeen’s over. He’s not doing anything particularly wrong. But just doesn’t look likely. “There’s nothing in it for him,” says Rogers on ABC. “Just do a job and bowl for the bloke at the other end.”
“I reckon we ought to find a few cricket references to carols and other festive songs,” suggests Johnny Starbuck on the email. “I did think about ‘Wickets falling’ for Shakin’ Stevens’ ‘Merry Xmas everyone’ but we need more help. I managed to get a sip of Ardbeg just before the last one and I have another bottle in reserve, with some Talisker if the Ardbeg doesn’t work. Either way, England fans need to do some serious work here.”
The perfect OBO task in the 45 minutes to lunch. Someone get LCD Soundsystem’s Christmas song into this list, please.
Another on the tweet, from Rudi Edsall. “Is the MCG currently the worst pitch in Australia?” An argument I’ve made the last couple of years. It’s the least interesting.
105th over: Australia 296-5 (S Marsh 55 Paine 8). Marsh batting beautifully here. Start of a new Woakes over, and he steers it behind point without a worry in the world. You get four for that. Oh, even better from Paine. That’s the off-drive of a man who has been out there for an hour, not 10 minutes. Dare I say it, he’s already in.
104rd over: Australia 287-5 (S Marsh 50 Paine 4). Shaun Marsh to 50! The same number of balls to get there as it took Warner to reach 100, Ric Finlay informs me via the ABC. 130 of them. Does so with a push to point, more great running from this new pair. They batted superbly together in Adelaide. Paine strokes the last ball of the over wide of cover for a couple. Assertive start from him.
“What is a good score on this pitch?” asks Lee Henderson. “Can England take 20 wickets on it? Can Australia? Answers here amongst a group of 6 is 350, no and maybe.”
It has been harder work than we thought it would be 24 hours ago. A bit tacky, maybe? Usually the case when players are chopping on. But to answer your questions directly, I’ll go with 400, yes and yes.
103rd over: Australia 284-5 (S Marsh 49, Paine 2). Well ran. Paine off the mark to fine leg. Could have walked a single, but instead they raced back for two. A better over from Woakes. They grab a drink. England’s hour. Somehow.
102nd over: Australia 282-5 (S Marsh 49, Paine 0). Shoooooot! Shaun Marsh took his time to consider how he come at Moeen. To the last ball, he went down the track and waited on a shorter ball, picking out the gap at point with perfection. Has deserved a chance to raise his bat here. One run away from doing so.
“Young AC,” writes in Robert Wilson. Merry Christmas, mate. “I missed the first day in my customary festive/dateline/hangover confusion. But after a traditional Parisian Christmas of screaming arguments with the neighbours over Israel, the Algerian War of Independence and the whole notion of French ‘comedy’, I blearily caught the highlights this morning. Good call about the sudden Tendulkar glimmer that Warner has added to his quiver. I know that Steve Smith is a phenomenon for the ages, a hiccup in the very laws of physics but I could watch David Warner bat until my eyes bleed.”
He’s the most interesting character in the game, for mine. Spent an hour interviewing him for a magazine feature in the middle of the year and came away with 6000 words of quotes I wanted to use. I’ll get a chance to write up the second half of it at some stage.
101st over: Australia 278-5 (S Marsh 45, Paine 0). Must say, I was about to have a gentle pop at Root for dragging Curran after two overs before Woakes went and did that. The new man Paine leaves the one ball he has to deal with to finish the over.
“Fiendish by Australia,” tweets @notDcfcBoss at me. “Getting out to awful deliveries will make England think they’ve bowled too well in the series so far.”
Gary Naylor makes a Game of Thrones reference that I don’t understand because I can’t bring myself to watch a show about dragons. I’m sorry. “Australia need to bring Daenerys Targaryen on to their coaching team.”
WICKET! M Marsh b Woakes 9 (Australia 278-5)
Another chop on! Woakes into the attack and gives Mitch Marsh a look at a very gentle delivery well outside the off-stump. But, just like his captain, he’s dragged it back on. Four balls into his work for the day, Woakes goes into the book. Ugly cricket but England won’t mind in the slightest. Suddenly, they are right back in this.
100th over: Australia 277-4 (S Marsh 44, M Marsh 9). Moeen to Mitch. He’s driving out to deep point for a couple, the area where he scored so many runs off the spinner in Perth. Happy enough to defend the rest. Not much going on from Mo early on.
Curran's ball to dismiss Smith pitched 10.4m from his stumps, the shortest ball he's been dismissed by this series. To balls shorter than that, he has scored at a run rate of 4.05rpo without dismissal #Ashes
— The Cricket Prof. (@CricProf) December 27, 2017
99th over: Australia 275-4 (S Marsh 44, M Marsh 7). Shaun up the gears now as well. It’s a poor over from Curran, three times drifting onto the left-handers’ pads, three times taken for runs. The final of those is helped to the fine leg boundary for Marsh’s first four of the morning.
98th over: Australia 267-4 (S Marsh 36, M Marsh 7). Moeen into the act for the first time today from the southern end. Mitch Marsh happy enough to watch the first few before leaning into a drive that nets him a couple through cover point. Couldn’t be a better time for a number six to get busy. Conditions perfect. The Richies singing a song about “Shauny Marsh” set to Jingle Bells. We do a lot of things really well as Australians. Cricket, for instance. We’re great at that. Not singing at the cricket, though.
97th over: Australia 265-4 (S Marsh 36, M Marsh 5). It was a stand of exactly 100 that Curran broke up. The Marsh brothers together now. The younger of the two off the mark with a punishing cut behind point, flying to the rope. The shot of a man in superb form. Has another go next ball, but a diving stop keeps it to one.
This is lovely.
Tom Curran bowling to the Marsh brothers. Bit of family history there... https://t.co/lMGRi26sCN
— Will Macpherson (@willis_macp) December 27, 2017
WICKET! Smith b Curran 76 (Australia 260-4)
Curran has done it! Smith out! Yes, you’re reading that correctly. The man on debut said to BBC this morning that despite his disappointment at what happened yesterday with Warner that he could make up for it by getting Smith as his first Test wicket, and it is precisely what he has done with his second delivery of the morning. Not a ball for the highlight reel, short and asking for it, but Smith has chopped it back onto the stumps. The young man loves it, running down the pitch with both arms out.
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96th over: Australia 259-3 (Smith 76, Marsh 35). In response to the Australian singing, the Barmy Army go with the funereal Abide With Me. Smith is beyond 500 runs in the series as well now. Well on the way to his third ton of the contest as well. Oh dear, Marsh gets one when Broad has a brain fade. The bowler had a ping at his stumps in his follow through for no obvious reason, it hits, allowing them to cross on the overthrow. Smith defends the rest, on the front foot then the back. “The new Rahul Dravid?” Simon Mann poses on radio.
95th over: Australia 258-3 (Smith 76, Marsh 34). What a shot from Smith. Anderson full, but not full enough to be clipped through square leg from outside off-stump for four. The first boundary of the day. Root has a very short, straight cover in place for Smith but he isn’t in the game when Jimmy dishes up his worst ball of the day so far, a short ball without any venom, put away behind square leg. Four more! “If you are in Melbourne,” Jim Maxwell says on radio, “get along to watch this.” It prompts The Richies (Australia’s answer to the Barmy Army) to launch into a rendition of the national anthem. Everyone having a nice time.
Steve Smith is taking the piss
— Matt Nicholls (@mattnicholls29) December 26, 2017
94th over: Australia 250-3 (Smith 68, Marsh 34). A couple through cover for Marsh, in the air but into the gap. It brings up the Australian 250. At lunch yesterday most had them reaching that mark by about half an hour after tea with Warner well on his way to 200. Or something like that. But that wasn’t to be. It’s been a grind ever since and a pretty good contest.
In the first four overs this morning, Australia have only been to leave five balls but just two balls would have gone on to hit the stumps #Ashes pic.twitter.com/E1vG4lSBoA
— The Cricket Prof. (@CricProf) December 26, 2017
93rd over: Australia 248-3 (Smith 68, Marsh 32). Back to back maidens from Anderson’s end. Smith forced to use his bat throughout, without concern.
LISTEN: @CricketAus CEO James Sutherland and @ECB_cricket CEO Tom Harrison with @GerardWhateley
— ABC Grandstand (@abcgrandstand) December 26, 2017
4 day Tests, competitive pitch conditions, the possibility of a day night Ashes Test in England and the Ben Stokes affair all topics for discussionhttps://t.co/OvUDDaGuJG
92nd over: Australia 248-3 (Smith 68, Marsh 32). “This pace is not going to worry Steve Smith,” observes Simon Katich on the radio as the skipper clips a couple off Broad to backward square leg then pulls a very gentle short ball to fine leg for a single. The MCG humming, the Barmy Army singing. A stunning day for cricket. For those still awake in the UK, a reminder of Smith’s record at this venue. Sorry.
"Steve Smith hasn't been out at the MCG since 2014..."
— The Ashes on BT Sport (@btsportcricket) December 26, 2017
"We haven't told our bowlers that!" 😉
Paul Farbrace speaks to @AlisonMitchell about Steve Smith and England's bowling.
📺 BT Sport 1 HD pic.twitter.com/krb5lZkPQX
91st over: Australia 245-3 (Smith 65, Marsh 32). Jimmy Anderson from the Melbourne Cricket Club End. Good early signs for the Australian no. 6, finding the middle of the bat throughout the over. A maiden. Apart from his close call first up yesterday, he’s looked tidy.
90th over: Australia 245-3 (Smith 65, Marsh 32). Bit of a shout for leg before second ball of the day, Broad coming around the wicket angling into Marsh. Denied by Umpire Ravi and no real consideration of a review. The left-hander then takes a single around the corner next ball to start his day. Smith is able to leave two of the three balls sent down to him.
England two overs behind the required over rate after just one ball. Poor stuff. https://t.co/4suCbbait3 pic.twitter.com/mnE6prW6Up
— Dan Liebke (@LiebCricket) December 26, 2017
Stuart Broad has the ball. He’ll be charging in from the Great Southern Stand End. Shaun Marsh is down the business end. PLAY.
A gentle, quiet start to the day. But we’re nearly there now, the players gathering at the boundary rope. James Sutherland and Tom Harrison, the CA and ECB Chief Execs, are currently talking to ABC radio. Usually good for a couple of news stories. For instance, Sutherland said he is an advocate for trialling four-day Tests. And Harrison adds that a day-night fixture for the 2019 Ashes is “unlikely” when Australian tour.
More great stories from the women’s game. What a year they have had. Also, a tri-series has been announced for March with India hosting Australia and England in 50 and 20 over fixtures. We need a lot more of this. The WBBL is kicking along nicely as well, a few weeks into the season and breaking records everywhere.
Okay, I’m here. Not before passing no fewer than eight match day experience (I think that’s what they call them?) people wishing me a nice day. Sure, why not. Meanwhile, here is the track [insert gag about this being a slab of the Hume Highway].
View from the Southern End of the MCG #Ashes pic.twitter.com/1REDno8kHn
— cricket.com.au (@CricketAus) December 26, 2017
Poor Tom Curran. That was the loudest I’ve heard the MCG for a single moment of cricket since Shane Warne’s 700th wicket 11 years earlier. “The worst feeling I’ve had,” the Surrey man on debut said of having Warner on 99 only for TV to show he was over the line. But to England’s immense credit, they didn’t lose their minds after the episode, picking up Warner six runs later.
On this topic more broadly. SURELY it is time we automated the process for Test cricket? The ICC gave the job to the third umpire during England’s home ODI series against Pakistan in 2016 and it worked a treat. Why the wait? Let’s find out.
Edit: Geoff Lemon actually wrote about this last night. We spend roughly four hours a month discussing the topic in the pub, so I am not surprised he’s given it the big ones.
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Busy, eventful and more difficult than it appeared. Just like his 2017. My take on Warner’s ton to get us going. For reading while listening to that Charlotte Wilson song, ideally.
Welcome to day two from the Melbourne Cricket Ground!
The MCG. The ‘G. The People’s Ground. On the best day of the year for cricket people if you ask me. Once again, the weather is doing its bit, not a cloud to be seen as I look out over Melbourne’s ample skyline from a couple of miles north of the city.
Once we arrive at the venue, attention turns to whether England can see off Steve Smith. It remains a binary proposition where the Australian captain is concerned. When he’s out there, England are in strife - regardless of how the other numbers on the scoreboard read at the time. Hardly revelatory, but this the state of play in the nutshell. If Joe Root’s men can go to work on Smith, we might have ourselves a bit of a day.
Looking forward to sharing it all with you over the next few hours. You know the drill, email and twitter work best. AOL? I have that. Want my number? I’ll give you that too.
Oh oh work
Now that you’re here
Whoa oh work
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Adam will be here shortly. Here’s Vic Marks on the opening day’s action:
It was a curate’s egg of a day. In the first session Australia raced to 102 without loss, 83 of which came from David Warner’s bat; in the second they were becalmed while losing two wickets. But in the evening Australia reasserted themselves, with Steve Smith back at the helm, protecting his side’s advantage as resolutely as a kangaroo does her joeys. At stumps Australia were sitting pretty once again on 244 for three. Smith, who barely missed a ball or played a shot in anger, was unbeaten on 65.
Smith is now so ruthlessly methodical that it is possible to perambulate the outside of this vast arena and still picture every stroke he plays. The great batsmen are so predictable and Smith undoubtedly is one of them. Yet the hordes of fans had probably come in the hope that it was Warner who would prevail, and he did not disappoint.
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