Summing up
So that’s us done for this Test, another by turns memorable and slightly bizarre match in this dizzying rollercoaster of a series. We head to Trent Bridge next, with England desperate to break their sequence of winning then losing, but they’ll have to do so without their most prolific bowler, Anderson. Anyway, thanks for all your emails, tweets and insights. It’s been fun. Bye.
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And the man of the match award goes to … STEVEN FINN. Anderson, Warner and Bell are all mentioned in dispatches but the returning Middlesex quick gets the award, and a richly deserved one too. “I felt in good rhythm when I’ve bowled for my county this season, and you’ve just got to trust the work you’ve done,” he says. He describes yesterday’s spell as probably the best he’s ever bowled in Test cricket. Well played sir.
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Alastair Cook steps up to the mic next, kicking off with major praise for the “absolutely unique” Edgbaston crowd, which he says has been as loud as he can ever remember. He praises his team’s professional procession to victory. Steven Finn earns praise: “To come back and bowl as he has done here is fantastic, and the hard work has been his … standing there at slip for that first spell, it was frighteningly good.” As for Bell, “class is permanent”, says the captain, defending the trust placed in England’s No3 after a difficult period. Time to break the win-loss-win-loss… sequence, says Athers.
Michael Clarke tells Michael Atherton “it’s very hard to explain” his side’s wildly variable performances. He still maintains that he would have batted first with the benefit of hindsight, but rues that his side “didn’t execute” with either bat and ball. He self-deprecatingly admits that “it’s time the captain got off the plane and turned up” with the bat, and praises England’s bowlers for not letting him settle early in his innings. He praises his tail-enders for fighting “their backside off” this morning, and admits that Australia will take some confidence from Anderson’s regrettable injury, invoking the Glenn McGrath injury here 10 years ago.
Anyway, stick around for a bit. We’ll have the presentation soon, after which those man-of-the-match discussions we’ve been having will be conclusively settled. Or perhaps not.
Here’s something for the Bell cheerleaders:
Post-match reaction: Ian Bell, talking to Ian Ward, praises England’s bowlers for “some of the best bowling I’ve seen since being part of the England set-up”, which is high praise indeed given his career’s longevity.
Speaking for so many of us dept:
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Want an on-the-whistle, as it were, match report? You got it.
England win the third Test by eight wickets!
31.1 overs: England 124-2 (Bell 65, Root 38) Bell tucks Marsh’s first ball away for four on the legside to win it. England go 2-1 up, and they deserve some credit for the way they’ve handled a potentially nervy run chase. Well played, particularly this pair.
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31st over: England 120-2 (Bell 65, Root 34) [Target 121]. Scores level. Bell nudges Lyon round the corner for one, then Root takes England to within two of victory with a well-judged sweep off the front foot that pierces the legside boundary and goes for four. He then takes a hurried single to mid-on to level the scores.
30th over: England 114-2 (Bell 64, Root 29) [Target 121] Is there a more English sight than a load of blokes in fancy dress doing a conga in a cricket ground? We’ve got one on the go at the moment. Another change of bowling, with Mitchell Marsh into the attack for the first time in this innings. He’s reasonably on the money, with a nice full line outside off stump, until he drops one a fraction short and Roots square cuts, with consummate style, for four. Seven needed.
“Appreciate where all the Finn love is coming from for MOTM,” appreciates Oliver, “but I think a joint award for Bell and Root is required. Both have kept their heads whilst all around seemed to be almost losing theirs in the two innings and their base allowed Moeen to push on for his score, as well as giving Finn something to bowl at and (hopefully...) seeing us home today. Could have been a different story without one of them at three and four.”
29th over: England 110-2 (Bell 64, Root 25) [Target 121] Tea is indeed going to be delayed. Bell takes a bit of a risk with a legside hoik off Lyon that isn’t too far from Marsh before a more composed clip in the same region brings a single. Root adds another before Bell is confounded by a bit of an extra kick off the turf but his edge is too high and wide for the slip and brings him a couple more runs instead.
28th over: England 106-2 (Bell 61, Root 24) [Target 121] Fun and games between Johnson and the crowd. Johnson has a big appeal for a legside strangle of Root, which Nevill takes well to his left. They opt to review it, but no bat can be detected, and the batsman survives. The very next ball is similarly slanted down leg, without Root getting anywhere near it, though it does provoke noisy ironic appealing from the crowd, some of whom may just have had a pint or two by now. An attempted slower fuller ball is horribly wide down the offside next up, but not called wide. He then pulls out of his subsequent delivery, to orchestrate yet more voluble raucousness from the crowd, before finally sending the last ball of the over down from a good couple of yards behind the crease. It’s a six-minute maiden, full of sound and fury but signifying little.
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27th over: England 106-2 (Bell 61, Root 24) [Target 121] Finn’s winning the MOTM suggestions from the OBO collective, though Gary Naylor offers a slightly mischievous shout out for the groundsman. Mark Turner thinks a nod should be offered to Moeen for his innings yesterday – and it did indeed feel like the one pivotal and influential piece of batting in the match, in the circumstances. Back to today’s action, Bell slog-sweeps Lyon for four to bring England to within 15 of victory.
26th over: England 101-2 (Bell 57, Root 23) [Target 121] “Stand up if you’re 2-1 up,” bellow the assembled in the Hollies Stand, revealing a confidence rarely seen in the OBO inbox today. Root adds a single from Johnson, who tries to target Bell with one slanted across him on the legside, but it’s not close enough to trouble him. We’re 10 minutes from tea but the umpires may well opt to play on until we get a result, we’re informed.
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26th over: England 100-2 (Bell 57, Root 23) [Target 121] Lyon’s back after Starc’s horror-show in the previous over from that end, and Bell turns him round the corner for a single. And then Root decides to have a go, sweeping across the line with sufficient power and confidence to bring him SIX over deep midwicket. He tries the same shot two balls later but doesn’t get hold of it – neither do any of the legside fielders though, and the over-spin slightly wrongfoots Johnson at square leg. It brings one, and enables Bell to bring the hundred up with a deliciously timed and executed push through the covers for four. I think – it’s just a hunch – that England are favourites now.
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25th over: England 88-2 (Bell 52, Root 15) [Target 121] Johnson returns to the attack – the last throw of the dice, reckons Nasser Hussain – and tests Root, a little, with a tempter outside off stump that the batsman leaves astutely. Root’s a little less convincing when he drives uppishly for no run with one of those length balls outside off stump to which he’s succumbed against Australia before. It’s another good over, crowned with one that nips back into Root’s upper thigh and has him stumbling a tad.
“Who’s going to be Man of the Match?” wonders John Starbuck. “Highest overall scorer Bell, or choice of best bowlers Anderson or Finn?” Finn, for my money – he was excellent in the first innings as well. And unbeaten with the bat, for what it’s worth –unless something really stupid now happens.
24th over: England 88-2 (Bell 52, Root 15) [Target 121] Wayward stuff here. Starc offers Bell too much that is leavable, including one that’s so slanted it’s practically at 45 degrees and is called wide. Nevill gathers it with theatrical excellence, mind, though second slip could just as easily have gathered it. The following ball is almost as bad, and also adds one to the extras tally. Shane Warne in the commentary box reckons its all part of a set-up for a massive inswinging yorker, but none is forthcoming. Instead, Bell cuts a back of a length ball backward of square for four to bring up another lovely half-century. The No3 conundrum there, solved.
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23rd over: England 82-2 (Bell 48, Root 15) [Target 121] Hazlewood continues, overpitches a fraction, and is driven down the ground for four by Root – the first boundary in a while. But the rest of the over is tidy. This innings generally has the feel of the first innings on a first morning. It’s been a back-to-front kind of Test like that.
22nd over: England 78-2 (Bell 48, Root 11) [Target 121] A change of bowling, and a change of ends for Starc, who’s on at the City End now. He’s not massively accurate initially but nor is he expensive: Bell clips him through midwicket for two but that’s the only addition to the score.
Gary Naylor takes up the cudgels on the Australia v New Zealand teaser raised a few overs back:
21st over: England 76-2 (Bell 46, Root 11) [Target 121] Bell takes another risk with a mistime hook from Hazlewood that goes up but comes down safely and brings him a single. Hazlewood’s bowling well here – in fact Australia’s bowling in this innings has been at least twice as good as it was first time out – and he concedes no other run from this over. A mere 45 needed.
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20th over: England 75-2 (Bell 45, Root 11) [Target 121] This run-chase is now meandering more than many of us thought it would at lunchtime. Lyon maintains a nice probing variety but can’t get a wicket. Bell gets a run with a flick square on the legside.
More on the Headingley 97 fancy-dress professor has been unearthed by Mike Harrold while Simon Paknadel reminds us that the Yorkshire Post described it thus: ‘Two men dressed in a pantomime-cow costume cavorted round the boundary, and were crash-tackled by officials after play: the man playing the rear end, Branco Risek, needed treatment in hospital. Brian Cheeseman, a university lecturer dressed as a carrot, was frogmarched from the ground for ‘drunken and disorderly behaviour’. He vehemently denied the allegations. Mr Cheeseman has been attending Headingley Tests in fancy dress since 1982.”
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19th over: England 74-2 (Bell 44, Root 11) [Target 121] Nevill musters half an appeal after an attempted strangle down the legside but Bell’s bat has got nowhere near it. The No3 pushes for a couple then drives for a single.
“Apropos the fancy dress,” wonders Chris Bourne, “has anybody yet turned up to a Test dressed as Jeremy Corbyn? Because then we’ll know that it’s really truly a thing now.” There’ll be a run on beige jackets and false half-beards, and increased sales of Labour Briefing, before Trent Bridge now.
18th over: England 71-2 (Bell 41, Root 11) [Target 121] Bell and Root trade singles. Three of which come from the over – the England batsmen just seem to be taking the pressure and intensity out of the situation at the moment, which shows a wisdom not always on view in this match.
This Lyth debate needs a Yorkshire contribution doesn’t it? Fear not, here’s David Hopkins: “While as a Yorkshire fan it’s great that we may get our opening batsman back for the title run-in, isn’t Lyth entitled to point to the ludicrous decision not to allow him to play himself in in the Caribbean, leaving him two tests to acclimatise before facing the full wrath of the Aussie attack?” He’s more than entitled, I’d say.
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17th over: England 68-2 (Bell 39, Root 10) [Target 121] Hazlewood replaces Johnson at the Pavilion end, and Bell squirts him away for a single. No other runs follow from a decent accurate over, though Australia obviously need rather more than just those now.
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16th over: England 67-2 (Bell 38, Root 10) [Target 121] Lyon’s back at the City End, and Bell makes room to cut a shorter ball through the covers for one. Then this time it’s Root’s turn to take a big risk against Lyon with an ill-advised legside heave that lands safely enough, but not where he intended. They run two and take drinks.
Re pantomime horses, recalls Adam Hirst: “At Headingley back in the Good Old 90s, a pantomime horse once got thrown out. The horse made the mistake of clip-clopping along the front of a well-tanked post-tea Western Terrace. Absolutely everything was launched at it, beer cups, chip wrappers, anything to hand with the whole stand in uproar. The fella at the front took the head off and started shouting and flashing Vs at the stand, which only provoked more laughter and launching. The police took the reins and led them out, still in their horse outfit. Some people think that it’s just not cricket to come in fancy dress.”
I think I might have been at that match - 97 Ashes? Wasn’t that also the Test at which one of the fancy-dress ejectees was actually a university professor, or somesuch?
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15th over: England 64-2 (Bell 37, Root 8) [Target 121] Johnson continues, over the wicket, and Bell turns him round the corner for a single. It’s the only scoring shot of a decent accurate over – Johnson’s looked the pick of Australia’s quicks again in this innings so far, albeit without producing anything as menacing as he did first thing yesterday.
“Surely now we begin the discussion of who gets Lyth’s spot?” begins Stephen Pay in a kind of self-fulfilling prophecy. “Needed to see this innings out to keep his place, one feels. I notice the Standard was cheekily suggesting Essex’ own Tom Westley last night.” Well, he’s been in fine form this summer, but in Division Two. The step up from the top of Division One has been tricky enough for Lyth.
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14th over: England 63-2 (Bell 36, Root 8) [Target 121] Root gets right on top of a back-of-a-length wide Hazlewood delivery outside off stump and square-cuts it with poise and timing for four. Only 58 needed, as the Barmy Army sing, “we’re halfway there…”
Here’s a thought: it’s been rollicking good see-sawing fun, this series, but it appears to have lacked the actual quality of that seen in the New Zealand series earlier this summer, which makes one wonder how a New Zealand-Australia series in this country, in these conditions, might pan out. I’d pay good money to see that.
13th over: England 59-2 (Bell 36, Root 4) [Target 121] “It wouldn’t be the same without a pantomime horse,” chuckles Bumble at some fancy-dress fun in the Hollies Stand, in a way that can only summon to mind the dread phrase “quintessentially English”. Bell is watchful to some probing stuff from Johnson slanted across the corridor outside off stump, before picking up two with a flick through the covers. A well judged scampered two follows when Bell nudges a shorter one off his hips to keep the scoreboard ticking over.
“I must disagree with your assessment of Lyth, Tom,” dissents Richard Woods in what can only be described as damning with faint, well, damning. “He did his job as lunch watchman, got into double figures and has now left the field for the batsmen.”
Wicket! Lyth lbw b Hazlewood 12, England 51-2
12th over: England 55-2 (Bell 32, Root 4) [Target 121] Josh Hazlewood rejoins the attack from the City End and gets Lyth straight away, with a ball that jags back into the left-hander’s pads. He reviews it, but it’s clattering off stump and it pitched in line, so the Yorkshire opener is out for another low score. It’s not looking good for him now. His county team-mate Joe Root, on the other hand, is full of it and he cracks his first ball past point for four. Hazlewood comes back at him well though with seam and swing to beat Root outside off stump.
“Sadly, Joe Neate’s kind offer is one I will have to refuse,” rues Simon McMahon, “being, as I am, 500 miles from Brighton, and not being one of the Proclaimers. So, a weekend of doing ‘family things’ beckons. Can’t wait.” It’s not every week you get three Proclaimers-related emails on the OBO so I’m publishing this one too.
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11th over: England 51-1 (Lyth 12, Bell 32) [Target 121] Johnson tests Bell with a well targeted inswinger that raps him just above the knee but it’s going down legside. Bell then plays another of this game’s Trademark Rash Shots with a footwork-free slash and miss at a wide one outside off stump. A good maiden over, largely for its pace rather than bounce.
“I take Ross in Edinburgh’s point (7th Over),” writes Stephen Pay, “but surely although this wicket has had something in it for the bowlers, the majority of wickets to fall in this game have been down to bad shot selection (to put it politely). There might be a call for an inspection, but that’s no guarantee you’d get a points deduction. Hardly the grounds man’s fault if 80% of the batsmen are playing like a side from the sub-continent in a hurry to go home.” A bit harsh on sides from the sub-continent aching to go home, to be honest.
10th over: England 51-1 (Lyth 12, Bell 32) [Target 121] Lyon maintains an assertive off-side field for Lyth, who fails to pierce it with a rasping square cut that’s excellently cut off by a diving Warner. It’s a good probing maiden.
Is there a more deadening compliment than “Ah, but he plays a good chief executive’s innings”?
9th over: England 51-1 (Lyth 12, Bell 32) [Target 121] Johnson’s on then, to the usual serenade of “he bowls to the left…”, which he does with his first ball, which is wide and easily left by Bell. The one bouncer of the over is straight and true but easy enough to duck under, and the local hero brings England to a rapid 50 with a wristy square drive for four.
One more plug – get a load of this, The Guardian Live with Andrew Flintoff in Edinburgh:
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8th over: England 47-1 (Lyth 12, Bell 28) [Target 121] Bell executes a rather smarter glide down to third man off Lyon, playing it late and steering it to the boundary. More transgressions from spectators behind the sightscreen momentarily delay things before Bell picks up three more with a chop square on the offside. A single brings to the strike Lyth, who creams a confidence-boosting four through the covers. And here comes Mitchell J…
Who fancies a game then? Here’s Joe Neate with an unrefusable offer.
“For anyone disappointed that this game looks like it might not make it to Sunday, fear not, the OBOcassionals are in action again down in Brighton in a mini-tournament for the Extra Cover charity. This is a final call to action for anyone who wants to come down to watch, play, or even umpire or do the score. Should be a terrific day out, and people of any ability are more than welcome. We’re playing this Sunday the 2nd August from 11am. To get in contact, there are a few options. Facebook: OBOccasionals Twitter: @JoeNeate1My email: joe.neate@gmail.com
Please get in contact, the more the merrier, and we’re mostly normal and friendly. We have two 20-20 games in the day, and if you turn up, you’ll get a game, guaranteed.
7th over: England 36-1 (Lyth 8, Bell 21) [Target 121] Bell unfurls a grade A, makers-name-displaying cover drive that races past Starc and to the ropes for four. Emboldened, he cracks the following delivery square on the offside for another boundary. Starc just can’t bowl a tight over in this match and he’s milked for four more with a deftly timed flick down to wide fine leg. And then - A DROP - Bell tries to steer it down to third man and edges it to Clarke, who spills it. Poor cricket all round there.
“Not sure if anybody else has passed comment,” comment-passes Ross in Edinburgh, “but what would happen in a County Championship match that saw 27 wickets fall on the first 2 days and is likely to be wrapped up the end of the third ? Would there be an inspection and potential points deduction for preparation of a “unsuitable” or “poor” pitch ?”
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6th over: England 23-1 (Lyth 8, Bell 8) [Target 121] Lyon finds some turn, which doesn’t greatly bamboozle Lyth, who square cuts uppishly, but it does befuddle the fielder at backward point who sees the ball spin past him and race to the boundary. The target is now below 100
5th over: England 19-1 (Lyth 4, Bell 8) [Target 121] After the dismissal of Cook with the first ball of the over, Bell is off the mark straight away, clipping a half volley nonchalantly through midwicket for four. He gets another, less impressive, boundary with a squirt past the slips to conclude an over.
“I can’t be the only person writing in to correct someone’s peculiar idea that the Aussies were bowled out for 121 at Headingley in 1981,” smartarses John Starbuck. No, they were bowled out for 121 at Edgbaston in 1981, like I said.
Wicket! Cook b Starc 7, England 11-1
Uh-oh. Here we go. Cook is comprehensively castled by an outswinger that pitches leg and clips off. Fine bowling. Now is the worrying time for home fans (well, in fact all day has been, but you get my drift).
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4th over: England 11-0 (Lyth 4, Cook 7) [Target 121]
We have some spin with the new ball, as Lyon comes on at the City End. No great surprise really. He finds some turn away from the left-hander and ramps up the pressure with an aggressive offside field, but Cook threads a firm drive through the gaps in the covers and adds three. An extra slip is brought in for Lyth, who’s well beaten with a sharp turner. But he survives, so we’ll call it a good leave. Or something.
3rd over: England 8-0 (Lyth 4, Cook 4) [Target 121]
No Mitchell Johnson yet – star batsman Starc continues at the Pavilion end. Lyth is off the mark with a lovely shapely cover drive for four. It feels like every run counts for him as much as England at the moment. He’s largely watchful for the rest of the over, with some good leaving outside off stump, though one sharp square cut is well stopped at gully.
So where should our money be going then? Here’s one suggestion:
Afternoon everyone. Tom here, taking up the chase. Well, like the people on the afternoon shift in Edgbaston’s bars, I wasn’t sure if I’d be called into action at all today. But here we are, with England facing a nervy little chase. The angst-infused historical precedents have been flying around social media this morning (have any cricket lovers in England done the remotest stroke of work today?) - that 121 is the precise total Australia were skittled for at Edgbaston in 1981; that England’s most recent fourth-innings score was 103 at Lord’s, on a flat pitch at that; that there are echoes here of the nerve-shredding chase at Trent Bridge 10 years ago; that the atmosphere in the ground at times this morning – sporadic Australian cheering interspersed with audible expressions of English anxiety – sounded exactly like it did, science boffins have demonstrated, on That Fourth Morning in Birmingham in 2005. A new chapter is waiting to be written here then …
2nd over: England 4-0 (Cook 2, Lyth 0) [Target 121]
Hazlewood, not Johnson, and he starts with leg-stump half-volley which Cook works away for two runs. Better line from Hazlewood. Two more as he reverts back to that first ball.
Nothing more for the rest of the over and that’s lunch!
1st over: England 0-0 (Lyth 0, Cook 0) [Target 121]
Good start from Starc - a maiden, with a few questions asked of Lyth. It ends with the Yorkshireman leaving one that rises and catches the toe of his bat, but it lands short of the man at gully.
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Here we go - Starc to open the bowling after the sightscreen issues are rectified....
ENGLAND NEED 121 TO GO 2-1 UP IN THE 2015 ASHES.
First, they’ll need to negotiate a tricky two/three over mini-session before the lunch interval. Johnson will probably get the new ball. Reckon we’ll see Nathan Lyon on early, too.
Big knock for Adam Lyth, of course.
Anyone thinking about this? http://t.co/H8rScXzYjL
— Peter Miller (@TheCricketGeek) July 31, 2015
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WICKET! Starc c sub (Poysden) b Ali 58 (Australia 265 all out)
That’s it! Mo floats one up, Starc goes to clear cover but miscues to the sub-fielder, Josh Poysden, who takes an easy catch.
England require 121 to win!
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79th over: Australia 265-9 (Starc 58, Lyon 12) [lead by 120]
Finn back into the attack and Starc clears his front leg to pierce the gap between cover and mid-off. Good work from Ali, though, and it’s stopped expertly. Gorgeous straight-drive from Lyon is stopped superbly by Finn, who aborts his follow-through to dive across and save one-handed.
Daniel Jeffereys, here, with the stats we don’t want to know:
“I am getting seriously worried about Australia’s total. According to ESPN CricInfo (!?) England have failed to score 100 in an innings on 19 occasions and on 13 of those occasions the opposition was - (!!@!!) Australia. In 1887 we managed just 45 runs off 35 overs in Sydney. Worst knock in a 2nd innings batting last was 46 against West Indies in 1994. For the love of God why don’t Australia declare?”
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78th over: Australia 264-9 (Starc 57, Lyon 12) [lead by 119]
Heave-ho from Starc but no connection, as Mo floats one above his eye-line. The next is slightly flatter and Starc connects this time but to backward point.
77th over: Australia 263-9 (Starc 56, Lyon 12) [lead by 118]
Diligent from Starc. Gutsy and calculated. He even manages to evade a full toss from Stokes that nearly wraps him on the wrist, but he does well to plonk it into the leg-side for a single at the end of the over.
“Lead’s going to be 128 isn’t it?” asks Neil Parkes, fearfully. “I can’t take it! At least no Warne this time around.”
76th over: Australia 262-9 (Starc 56, Lyon 12)
Starc picks a single off to mid-on this time as Lyon takes guard against Moeen, who is operating around the wicket to both batsmen. Lyon gets on full and outside off-stump and leans forward to push through cover for one. Firm bunt down the ground gives Starc another. Lyon then sweeps fine for two to finish the over.
75th over: Australia 257-9 (Starc 54, Lyon 9) [lead by 112]
Starc is happy to let Lyon face Stokes. A single and Lyon is swinging and missing at a fifth stump delivery. Lyon then gets forward with a lot more conviction and strikes four through extra-cover.
Here’s Dave Brooker from Canada: “Er, I don’t want to get too pessimistic, but can someone tell Jimmy Anderson not to go home just yet, side strain or not. We might be needing him. To bat.”
Replay shows Lyon would have been out second ball on review. England have none left: http://t.co/4mc8FjkOAT #Ashes pic.twitter.com/LUhCkGjEMF
— cricket.com.au (@CricketAus) July 31, 2015
74th over: Australia 252-9 (Starc 53, Lyon 5) [lead by 107]
Mid-off and mid-on pushed back to Starc. Moeen floats one up and Starc’s head goes back to smash over mid-wicket. No connection, for bat on ball or ball on stump. Next ball is played with a bit more thought as he pushes to the man out at mid-off for a single. Lyon sweeps his first ball for a single to deep square leg. Another harder one from Lyon, squarer, goes to the fence for four!
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73rd over: Australia 245-9 (Starc 51, Lyon 0) [lead of 100]
Stokes into the attack, replacing Joe Root. He starts over the wicket and signs of a touch of swing, as he starts one wide of leg stump which goes on to wrap the top of Hazlewood’s pad on leg stump. The next ball, Root takes a stunning catch at third slip. Big appeal against Nathan Lyon, first up, but it’s not out - seems to have hit just outside the line. At least Aleem Dar thought so, anyway. Hawkeye says “umpire’s call”. Close again – Dar thinks long and hard and still not out. Fair enough. Lyon finally gets bat on one, right back to the bowler. And again. Wicket maiden. Turns out the second one was out. Ah well...
Scores of more than 50 since April 2014: Mitchell Starc: 2 Michael Clarke: 1 #ENGvAUS
— Daniel Cherny (@DanielCherny) July 31, 2015
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WICKET! c Root b Stokes 11 (Australia 245-9)
Brilliant catch from Root - Stokes pushes one across Hazlewood, who swings wildly and Root takes a blinding one-handed catch, diving high to his right at third slip. Stunner.
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72nd over: Australia 245-8 (Starc 51, Hazlewood 11) [lead by 100]
Starc very watchful of Moeen’s flight and defending nicely, almost inside-out. Leaves his third ball, as Mo gives this one a little bit more air. Not enough for Ponting, who wants Starc to be tempted. He is, the very next ball, and he goes high but straight enough to evade the man running back from mid-off. Another four. An almighty heave the next ball goes higher than it does long but still manages to plink on the right side of the boundary, from an Australian point of view, for six! That’s Starc’s fifty from 83 balls.
71st over: Australia 235-8 (Starc 41, Hazlewood 11) [lead by 90]
Flighted and Starc is foward and swiping him down the ground for a one-bounce four. Really well played by Starc. He scampers a single that looks tight but Ali’s throw and Buttler’s mean Hazlewood is safe. Solid defence to finish the over.
70th over: Australia 230-8 (Starc 36, Hazlewood 11) [lead by 85]
Hazlewood gets his first boundary – a fortuitous edge as he misreads the ball off the pitch and hurries through a back-foot punch, which trickles for third man boundary, fine, for four.
Spin from both ends now as Root comes on for Finn...
Huw Neil reckons he’s seen this somewhere before...
“Do you think that Australia can bat through to at least luncheon, leaving England a target of 130 (which Australia failed to chase down in 1981 at Headingly)? Could Johnson or Starc be Edgbaston 15’s Bob Willis? I shudder at the prospect.”
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69th over: Australia 226-8 (Starc 36, Hazlewood 7) [lead by 81]
Hazlewood starts the over with a single allowing Starc to a full five.
“Two of my friends were doing star jumps to get Nevill out - the sweat was flowing but it worked.. . and who is this other Richard Thompson?”
Only two Richard Thompsons, two Richard Thompsons etc
68th over: Australia 225-8 (Starc 36, Hazlewood 6) [lead by 80]
Couple of strangled appeals as Starc drives right next to his pad. Manages to get one out of the middle but he’s driving it into the ground just in front of him and Ali can field it easily. Maiden.
We’ve got a challenger to Richard Thompson’s theory...
@Vitu_E Not meaning to brag, my dog caused the Nevil wicket. If it hadn't needed a walk..... you're welcome England
— phil withall (@phil_withall) July 31, 2015
67th over: Australia 225-8 (Starc 36, Hazlewood 6)
Just one from the over - to Starc. Broad off next over as Ali takes the ball.
Richard Thompson gets to the root of the overdue wicket this morning:
“Two of my friends are claiming credit for Nevill’s wicket as they had (independently, hopefully) left their listening positions at work to visit the WC. Will the OBO community support my superstitious calls for them to remain there until the Aussie innings is wrapped up?”
I’m in favour.
66th over: Australia 224-8 (Starc 35, Hazlewood 6) [lead by 79]
Couple of solid defends of the ball and Hazlewood then gives himself room to drive down the ground for three. An easy single for Starc gives Hazlewood one more ball to play. Another solid bunt and another couple.
Robert Speed e-mails in: “I really like the DRS review when the batsman knows full well he’s out. It’s added a lot to the game. (that is sarcasm).”
Elliott Carr-Barnsley and the Edgbaston massif aren’t fans of that, either, Rob: “Big send off from the crowd for Nevill. Clearly not too taken to someone reviewing when they must know they’ve hit it, that’s not what reviews are for. Fair enough if it’s an lbw shout, but not a chance he didn’t know he’d clipped that.”
65th over: Australia 218-8 (Starc 34, Hazlewood 1) [lead by 73]
Second ball and Finn gets a feather from Nevill for his sixth of the innings. Josh Hazlewood is the new man (another leftie) and he’s right behind two good length balls from Finn, who is currently in possession of his best Test figures.
WICKET! Nevill c Buttler b Finn 59 (Australia 217-8)
Nevill feathers one through to Buttler, who takes an excellent catch diving to his left. Carbon copy of one off the glove that wasn’t given earlier. England, at ease...
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HE’S SMASHED THE COVER OFF IT! PRAISE BE TO DAR!
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WICKET! Nevill c Buttler b Finn... oh a review....
Nevill feathers one around the corner and it’s given but the batsman wants a review...
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64th over: Australia 217-7 (Nevill 59, Starc 54) [lead 72]
Short-leg in for Nevill as Broad starts another over. He works around the corner first ball and Starc is the man on strike. He’s also got a short-leg for company and he plonks one over his head as Broad pushes him back. Single taken. Another worked single around the corner takes Nevill to 59. Starc gets a leading edge and manages to scamper two as the ball squirts wide of mid-off.
Australia's eighth wicket - at least I hope so! https://t.co/ep56KUrTIp @Vitu_E
— Gary Naylor (@garynaylor999) July 31, 2015
63rd over: Australia 212-7 (Nevill 57, Starc 31) [lead by 67]
Finn starts with a short one, now over the wicket to Starc. He follows up with a fuller, straighter one which hits Starc high on the back thigh – an appeal, Dar says “not out”. Wider and fuller and Starc has his fourth boundary, timing nicely through extra cover. A much better delivery cuts Starc in half
Sarah Morris joins us from Croatia, where she has just had a massage: “I was fully expecting us to have sorted this all out by the time a lady with very strong thumbs had worked her magic. Now all the tension is flooding back.”
And so does Guy Perry, poetically but massage-less, from Kerala: “And so, in my home city, Birmingham becomes the Bullring of Broken Dreams for those floppy-capped sledgers. Let England sharpen the blade, twirl the lavish cape, squeeze into sparkly matador trousers – ouch they’re tight – and drag the knackered visitors to the Slaughterhouse of Sledgers.”
62nd over: Australia 208-7 (Nevill 57, Starc 27) [lead by 63]
A skewed on-drive makes its way to Moeen Ali, though not before Starc is able to scamper for a single to allow Nevill to take the remainder of this Broad over.
The spirit of Haddin lives on...
An Australia wicketkeeper edging everything for four. Huh.
— Dave Tickner (@tickerscricket) July 31, 2015
61st over: Australia 207-7 (Nevill 57, Starc 26) [lead of 62]
Finn goes full to Starc and he drives well through the covers for four. Two balls later Finn is back in the batsman’s half again and this time three is taken. That’s the fifty partnership, from 86 balls. Last ball of the over, Finn bowls an outswinger and Nevill drives away from his body, thick-edging through a vacant gully region. Another four...
Gareth Wilson, who was on here yesterday, joins us for the first time today...
“It’s too painful to watch. I blame all the chat last night about winning inside two days. Hubris, you old devil….”
60th over: Australia 196-7 (Nevill 53, Starc 19) [lead of 51]
Muted appeals after Buttler takes excellent down the leg-side, as Broad has Nevill bunching up with one that rises on him. Atherton reckons there was a tickle on the glove, but Chris Gaffaney, the standing umpire, thinks not.
Bob Logs is here to make the trouble go away...
“Lead of 51 should be enough... http://www.espncricinfo.com/ci/engine/current/match/352661.html”
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59th over: Australia 196-7 (Nevill 53, Starc 19) [lead by 51]
Starc slashes at a wide one and it somehow finds its way through the slip fielders and away to the third man boundary for four! Cook orders a tightening up and a couple of balls later Finn beats Starc’s edge. And again. Can’t really fault the bowling, to be fair. Four off that over.
Chris Fowler’s getting funky: “19 runs for the Australians off the first two overs is a fair old lick. Do you suppose that they’re playing for a declaration before lunch?’
58th over: Australia 192-7 (Nevill 53, Starc 15) [lead by 47]
Starc whips off middle and leg and Moeen dives over one at mid-on for four! Single off the fifth ball and Nevill leaves. So far, so good for Australia.
*bites fist, begins to weep*
57th over: Australia 187-7 (Nevill 53, Starc 10) [lead by 42]
Finn starting around the wicket to Starc and the pointy-nosed one gets forward and pushes down the ground for three to bring Nevill back on strike. Nevill goes to leave and Finn catches the back of his bat: the ball ricochets just past the stumps and away for four to take the keeper to 49*. Then he works another around the corner for another four - that’s Nevill’s first Test fifty.
“I was bowling in the Champs de Mars last night with a plane tree for wickets,” starts Daniel Jeffreys. “My girlfriend as the last four batsmen of the Australian test side. I skittled out Nevill, Starc, Hazelwood and Lyon for 6 runs, which can only mean one thing - my girlfriend can’t bat. If I dip my croissant in my coffee does that make it bulletproof?”
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56th over: Australia 176-7 (Nevill 45, Starc 7) [lead by 31]
Broad kicks us off. A thick edge off the second ball finds it’s way to the vacant third man boundary. Nevill then opens the face and Stokes has a fumble after a chase to allow another two. Another edge drops short of Bell at third slip and the captain gallops after it. Another two.
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Jerusalem on the ones and twos, so we must be underway soon..
“I also have the fear, though Geraint Morgan’s concerns about our bowlers being stupid enough to bounce Johnson are misplaced. Not that some of our bowlers don’t seem perfectly capable of stupid decisions when it comes to bouncing tailenders, but Johnson’s already out. Even Stuart Broad couldn’t try to bounce someone already back in the dressing room.” Thanks for joining us, Geoff Savage.
A final pre-play thought from Bob Miller:
“Homer Simpson puts butter in his coffee. That’s worked out well for his diet, eh?”
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And Tom McKenna too...
@Vitu_E https://t.co/WXGoq6cVi4 buttery bulletproof is a staple of the hipsters diet. Don't read this with a hangover mind you...
— Tom McKenna (@tommckenna_) July 31, 2015
So has Chris Hind:
“Butter in coffee is a health fad, often known as ‘bulletproof’ coffee. It’s supposed to help with a ketogenic diet. If you’re accompanying your coffee with carbs you’re not on a keto diet so don’t bother.”
Had no idea “buttered tea” was a thing. But David Hopkins has had it:
“I’ve never tried butter coffee, but Dhananjay’s note does remind me of the difficulties I had pretending to enjoy a butter tea made by generous hosts in Nepal. It’s apparently just the thing to help you walking in the Himalayas but it also makes a suet pudding seem like a ryvita in comparison...”
This is the kind of pessimistic thinking we thrive on. Take it away, Alex Gemmell:
“If Australia’s 4 remaining batsmen equal their own individual Test high score they will have a lead of over 200. Starc scored 99 against India.”
Step into the asylum, Geraint Morgan. I’ll get the kettle on:
“Is it perfectly normal English to spend this morning working out the ways England can lose this match? I have fears of Australia getting a lead of 120 as the depleted bowling attack gets frustrated with the tail enders, and then someone stupidly bowling a bouncer at Johnson…”
Apologies, Dhananjay Jagannathan, got the wrong end of the shtick:
“No, no! I was praising your breakfast choice. Buttered coffee is evil.”
Now I’m intrigued... (reaches for the Lurpak)
Matt Brown’s on e-mail too (from his iPhone - la di da):
“Could Jimmy’s injury be the equivalent of the Glen McGrath injury a decade ago? Joining you in being bloody terrified btw.”
Anthony Pease definitely read his Encore Tricolore at school:
“My early morning post on The Facebook of ‘C’est magnifique, mais ce n’est pas un Test Match. C’est de la folie,’ resulted in an ongoing swarm of franglais cricket references which my friend Lawrence nurdled out of the park with ‘Ma grand-mère peut le frapper avec un stick of rhubarb.’”
And below - misery, company:
@Vitu_E Australia are effectively 23-7 but I've still got The Fear. #Ashes
— Albert Freeman (@AlbFreeman) July 31, 2015
@Vitu_E I'm as petrified as you are!
— Jack (@sven945) July 31, 2015
Apologies for the delay. But Richard Lankshear is with me...
“I’m with you.” See?
“Went to bed last night, smile on my face after a bottle of wine and replaying the highlights from Day 2. But this morning, the reality of our precarious state has set in, with Johnson and Neville about to develop a steady 100-run partnership as the pitch flattens out and Australia ending 200 runs ahead after a toothless Anderson-free England attack falters in the heat. The day ends with England returning to form, three down with 42 runs on the board and Australia in the ascendancy for day 4.
“Oh God help us.”
While Dhananjay Jagannathan is questioning my breakfast choices by suggesting a questionable choice of his own: “Far better than some carbs and another buttered coffee.”
BREAKING NEWS: James Anderson ruled out for remainder of Test and Trent Bridge
So Anderson has officially been ruled out the fourth Test at Trent Bridge, as well as the rest of this one. His availability for the final Test at the Kia Oval will be determined in due course.
In case you were wondering how much of a loss Anderson will be in Nottingham, just have a look at his Test stats at the venue...
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Preamble
It’s the Ashes. The bloody Ashes. England are going to go 2-1 up in the ruddy Ashes. Then they’ll park the bus and win the bloody Ashes.
I’m going to level with you – I’m terrified (Vish here, by the way. Morning, and all that).
Australia lead by 23. Peter Nevill’s impression of a barnacle last night was oddly beautiful. Mitchell Starc volleyed one destined for leg stump and is still there (England had no reviews at the time and appealed as such). Any chase should be a formality. Of course Australia shouldn’t win. But we’ve seen a lot of things in the last week that shouldn’t have happened. THEY KILLED A LION CALLED CECIL!! Oh and Jimmy’s injured! I’m a wreck. Anyway, another coffee and some buttered carbs should help. Join me as we lose the bloody Ashes.
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