A nice postscript: Joe Root is now officially the world’s best batsman, the first England player to reach No1 since Michael Vaughan after his Ashes mirabilis in 2002-03. Bye!
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England have won the Ashes. There’s your postamble!
Thanks for your company today, 8 August 2015, one of the happiest days in the modern history of English cricket. Bye!
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Mark Wood: “Absolutely phenomenal. I was just blown away with emotion, I was still shaking half an hour after we won. The scenes in the dressing-room are great. It’s not so good being a teetotaler! I don’t remember the final wicket to be fair. I never thought even a year ago that I’d be playing in an Ashes wicket, never mind taking the winning wicket. I’ll remember it forever.” And with that, he walks straight over to give him Mum a bit hug. He is such an infectious character. “It’s probably a good thing he doesn’t drink,” says Beefy, “because I dread to think what he’d be like with a few pints inside him.”
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Trevor Bayliss: “It was hairs-on-the-back-of-the-neck-standing-up stuff. No mixed emotions. I’m not going to gloat, I know a lot of them very well, but the feeling amongst our guys is fantastic. Australia are a very good team and that’s why the England boys should be very proud of their performance. I couldn’t have imagined it would turn out like this, but the win at Cardiff gave the boys so much confidence.
“There were a few nerves at the start, but enough ability that they could see past that. If they concentrate on what they’re doing, they’re going to be very difficult to beat. At Lord’s we got away from playing our game, and it was just a case of not worrying what the opposition were doing and concentrating on our individual gameplans. In the last two matches we have done that perfectly. There were no harsh words after Lord’s, but we spoke about some realities and the team were very honest about what needed to be done.
“As soon as we mentioned moving to No3, Ian Bell grabbed hold of the opportunity. The way he played at Edgbaston showed his attitude: he wanted to take the role head-on. You can never replace a player like Jimmy but it gives someone else an opportunity to begin their career in the same fashion. Stokes took on Jimmy’s swing-bowling role absolutely perfectly and that will stand England in great stead.
“You can’t have immediate success like this without some good work in the previous 18 months. You try to add value to what has been done before, and the work Peter and the backroom staff have done with these young players has been fantastic. Cookie is very well respected in the dressing-room, and his captaincy has been spot on. He’s been proactive rather than reactive, he’s taken a few decision that maybe he wouldn’t have done in the past, and we’ve all seen the benefit of being positive. I see my role as giving the players and captain options - if you give the captains two or three options, he still has to pick one.
“We’re not gonna paper over the cracks. We’ll enjoy this moment but there are areas we need to improve if we want to be a good, consistent team over a number of years. But the signs are good.”
Joe Root is wearing a rubbery old-man mask, doing a hilariously bad impersonation of Bob Willis. “Wellll I’d give England 4/10. It wasn’t a patch on myyyy day was it?” Now he has his mask off and is being soaked by Ben Stokes. “I’ve felt pretty good in the middle,” he says, wiping champagne out of his eyes. The great thing about this team is that everyone’s chipped in. I’m sure it’ll be an entertaining evening. I can’t wait for that and then to crack on at the Oval.”
Joe Root was 50/1 to win Sports Personality of the Year at the start of the series. I thought about it and then I decided to have a freelancer’s nap instead. Ach!
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Ian Bell, who has won the Ashes for the fifth time: “This one is right up there. The bowlers set the tone from ball one in the last two Tests, and made it a lot easier for us as a batting unit. This is as good a dressing-room as I’ve been involved in. The way we reacted after Lord’s was exactly what we needed to do. There was a real calmness. Edgbaston was a big Test for me; it’s nice to still be here at Trent Bridge! The team performance has been incredible.”
“I have no particular problem with Michael Clarke, but I do think taking out the opposition captain is the sign of a really crushing series win,” says Tom Hopkins. “I have in mind Graeme Smith’s habit of laying waste to multiple England skippers.”
Yeah. It was so important at the start of the series that England took down at least one senior player as soon as possible. You could never have imagined they would taken down so many.
The Man of the Match is Stuart Broad, who has now produced three Ashes-winning spells in consecutive home series. I can’t remember the last time someone did that. “Cooky will tell you: I wanted to bat! It was a good toss to win, there was green grass on the pitch, but we got our lengths right and the catching was spectacular. A lot of credit has to go to our batsmen in this series; we’ve played on wickets that have done a bit and they have put scores on the board. Our last four innings, four different guys have got five-fors, so that shows how we’ve dovetailed as a bowling unit.
“That’s the best I’ve ever seen Ben Stokes bowl. He had the ball on a piece of string. What an exciting future he’s got. It was awesome to watch. Having an all-rounder gives you the luxury of bowling short spells, which is important on wickets that do a bit. The balance of the attack has been awesome - it’s the first time we’ve settled into a five-man attack since Freddie was around.
“I did see the Brisbane Courier Mail backpage and they printed my face, which was the biggest compliment yet from them! It’s the younger guys who are leading the team through, people like Joe Root and Ben Stokes. That one-day series led through to the Ashes. The games have been short but they’ve been action-packed - I feel like I’ve played four five-day games.”
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Alastair Cook: “To Michael, from the England cricket team: you should be remembered as a great cricket and a fantastic cricketer, so congratulations ... I can’t believe what we’ve achieved over the last 18 months ...” Now Cook is welling up! “When you lose 5-0 a new side develops pretty quickly, and I think you’ve seen the amount of talent in the country. It takes a little bit of time but we saw the potential, and Ben Stokes in that second innings was fantastic. Joe Root, Jos Buttler, Moeen Ali, they have all done incredibly well and driven this side forward. I’m also very lucky to have a group of senior players: Broady, 8-15, almost guarantees you the Test match. Jimmy, Belly, the support I’ve had from them means a lot.
“The amount of work Peter Moores did was so important. Trevor has come in and taken that forward again. Today is not about me, or me getting emotional, it’s a group of players who have taken that journey - I know it’s a horrible word - through so many tough times. That’s the moment you play for, when Woody gets that last wicket.
“(The brand of cricket) is down to the players embracing the idea. We said at the start of the New Zealand series that we wanted to show off our talent. I had to lead from the front. I am quite stubborn and it might have taken me a bit of time to change. Trevor Bayliss has only just turned up, so let’s not give him too much credit! Trevor has made us relaxed and allowed us to play our own way. It’ll be strange going to the Oval nowhere near as nervous as we have been, but we can worry about that another day. We’re going to get banjoed on booze tonight!”
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“As it’s unlikely that the Australians will be tempted to do a book on this tour maybe the OBO could?” says John Starbuck. “If so, the title might well be on the LWLWLW theme and subtitled Antipodeans on the England tour, including the women’s games, the New Zealanders and all the short-form matches too. It might not be entirely OBO lists, as in some cases an extended essay would be better.”
Michael Clarke: “Our goal was to come here and try to have some success. Alastair Cook and the England team have shown us how to play in these conditions. It wasn’t for the lack of trying, but we’ve been beaten by a better team. England, when they’ve had momentum, have grabbed it with both hands. They showed their class in this Test match. Was it a tour too far for some players? Maybe for the captain. I’ll always hold myself accountable. My performances have been nowhere near the level they should be. I don’t blame anyone in that dressing-room, they have all worked hard. Was it a difficult decision? Not when you perform as I have in this series. I think it’s the right time to walk away to give the next captain the chance to prepare for the next Ashes.
“I’ve been very lucky to play over 100 Tests. I was lucky that when I first came into the team I had 10 or 11 older brothers who helped me to grow and learn....” Clarke tails off as a lump swells in his throat ... “I’m sick of crying on television, I know that! There’s that much talent in the changing-room, they will be fine, I know that.”
It's time for the presentations
It’s not even Saturday lunchtime, it’s not even the fifth Test, and England have the Ashes. Crikey. Here comes Michael Clarke.
There’s nothing in sport to compare with the joy of seeing a young team succeed. Root, Stokes and Buttler are 24, Bairstow and Wood 25, Finn is 26. It’s that, along with Cook’s redemption, that will define this Ashes series.
It would be daft to say they are going to rule the world; we’ve made that mistake before. But with their talent and - just as important - their personality, we are going to have so much fun watching them in the next few years.
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Michael Clarke: “England showed us how to execute swing and seam bowling throughout this series. We were outplayed, no doubt about it. I’ll have one more Test and I’m retiring from international cricket. The time’s right. It’s always a tough decision, but my performances over the last 12 months have not been acceptable to me. And you build yourself up to the big series - the World Cup and the Ashes. I tried my best, the boys tried their best, but we were well beaten. Now it’s time for the next generation.”
While everyone else quaffs beer on the balcony, Mark Wood has a bottle of still water in his hand. I think I might be dangerously obsessed with Mark Wood. Ian Botham is revelling in the fact he predicted an England win. The fact he has predicted an England win for the last 48 Ashes is neither here nor there.
Hic! The England players have cracked the beers open in the dressing-room. Sky’s Ian Ward has just been drowned in champagne by Joe Root and Jimmy Anderson. Ottis Gibson has a half-empty bottle of rum in his hand. This is wonderful stuff. Imagine how good they must feel right now. “I shouldn’t be laughing because it’s hurting my side,” says Jimmy as he embraces Ian Ward.
BREAKING NEWS: PIERS MORGAN IS ELECTED POPE
Thanks to my colleague Niall McVeigh for this gem.
Alastair Cook thinks his current KP-less England team will regain the Ashes this summer. In other news, I will be elected Pope in August.
— Piers Morgan (@piersmorgan) June 3, 2015
Mark Wood, daft as a brush, is now taking his imaginary horse for a walk round the outfield. Here’s Paul Farbrace: “It’s unbelievable isn’t it? Every session seems to have been a rollercoaster. So please for the lads because we took a real hit after Lord’s, and to bounce back as they have is absolutely outstanding. I’m so pleased for Cooky; he’s been through the wringer the last couple of hours, and this morning he was a bit stressed, but to finish it that way was great. None of us could have dreamed that we would win with a game to spare. The satisfaction that we get from watching the boys celebrate is just out of this world. It’s about the players, they deserve all the credit they’re getting.”
Michael Clarke has announced his retirement from international cricket
The media don’t always lie. Reports of Michael Clarke’s retirement were not remotely exaggerated; the final Test at the Oval will be his last. At the same time, England are posing for a team photo, smiles so broad that they’re in danger of splitting their mouths. Cricket, lovely, cruel cricket.
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I was trying to think of the last team an Ashes victory was so unexpected. You could make a case for 1986-87, 1989, 2005, 2009 and 2013-14, but I reckon this tops those. You might even have to go back to 1958-59.
The England team are doing a lap of honour. Cook hugs Anderson. It’s so good that he is with the team today. It is so hard for top-class sportsman to achieve something great with your team, then suffer a comedown as the team breaks up, then go again with a new team in the twilight of their career. Anderson and especially Broad have managed that with some exceptional bowling in this series.
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ICYMI: ENGLAND HAVE WON THE ASHES! Trevor Bayliss and Paul Farbrace are straight into their celebrations. Bayliss is quaffing what looks like Ribena, Farbrace what looks like orange squash.
Alastair Cook: “Unbelievable. Unbelievable moment. I couldn’t be happier. From what we’ve been through in the last 18 months, to play like this, is incredible. I’m so proud of this young team, to take this opportunity, even without Jimmy ... We need to thank Peter Moores as well. A lot of the guys made huge developments under him, and you saw a lot of it in this series. Trevor has come in and done a fantastic job as well with Paul Farbrace. This is for you Peter.
Ben Stokes: “Phwoar, we’ve won the Ashes with one game to go, it’s absolutely surreal. From where I was last time in Australia to be an Ashes-winner it’s absolutely amazing. The crowd here ... it’s been electric ... That’s the best I’ve bowled in an England shirt. Everyone has put their hand up at some stage in the series.
The Aussies are on the field, shaking hands with the England players. Now Sky are repeating the celebrations, with the England team getting straight into a huddle when the last wicket fell. What a feeling, especially for all the youngsters, and of course for Cook.
Mark Wood finishes it off, bowling Nathan Lyon via the inside edge, to prompt a lusty, joyous roar all around Trent Bridge. You don’t always get to say this but, jeez, it feels good to be English. Alastair Cook looks relatively emotional as he takes it all in. Ben Stokes has a stump, Jimmy Anderson is beaming on the balcony, demonstrating some impeccably white teeth. England have routed Australia twice in 10 days to pull off the most unexpected Ashes victory in decades.
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WICKET! Australia 253 all out (Lyon b Wood 4) ENGLAND WIN BY AN INNINGS AND 78 RUNS!
ENGLAND HAVE WON THE BLEEDIN’ ASHES!
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72nd over: Australia 248-9 (Voges 50, Lyon 0) Lyon ignores a series of wider deliveries from Stokes, who waves his cap angrily at the end of the over, frustrated that he didn’t make Lyon play more.
71st over: Australia 248-9 (Voges 50, Lyon 0) Mark Wood spears four byes down the leg side, trying for the glory ball. If you can’t try for the glory ball, when can you. He is daft as a brush, Wood, in the most affectionate sense of the phrase.
“This isn’t just a time for Australia to be looking forward, but also England,” says Ben Hendy. “There have been a few mid-order collapses on our side of the scorecard in this and recent series. There are question marks hovering specifically over Lyth and Bell, with Bairstow only recently installed at 5. I don’t even know what I think about remodelling the top half, but where do you stand? And if they’re all fit, who plays out of Anderson, Broad, Wood and Finn (assuming Stokes is taking the all-rounder position regardless so isn’t part of that question)?”
I think it’s really important to fully embrace rotation, certainly in the fast bowling and maybe the batting too. So I’d have a football mentality and perceive Finn and Wood as members of the squad rather than thinking of a best XI. It’s so important to change the mentality, so we don’t think of players being dropped as we do now. I’d give Lyth the next Test and decide then. The lack of alternatives is a bit of a worry, especially with a tough winter ahead.
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70th over: Australia 244-9 (Voges 50, Lyon 0) Voges plays tip-and-run to reach an excellent fifty in trying circumstances, one that has surely bought him at least one more Test. Lyon is beaten by a monstrous inswinger from Stokes, who has figures of 20-7-36-6.
“That was a pretty painful innings to watch,” says Tom Hopkins. “To expand on Warner’s comment, Hazelwood looked like every ball was the first he’d ever faced in his life.” Haha, that’s a great line, which I’d be tempted to nick had I not just published it under your name. Ach!
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69th over: Australia 243-8 (Voges 48, Lyon 0) “Yesssssssss” roared Wood after the ball thumped into middle stump. The net hero has been such a good addition to this England side, and that was perfect bowling to a tailender. It was the last ball of the over, so Stokes gets first crack at the Ashes-winning wicket.
“On the ranking of recent Ashes victories I would have to say this one feels by far the best,” says Daniel Jeffreys. “After the 0-5 demolition in 2013/2014, my Australian colleagues confidently predicted that England would not win the Ashes again for a generation or two. Seeing their faces during the 60-all-out debacle was like watching Wile E Coyote run off cliffs in pursuit of the Road Runner. One minute they were smug with anticipation, confident that Edgbaston had been a fluke, that Lords was the true state of play between the teams. And suddenly, with nothing but air and humiliation beneath their feet, their faces had that priceless “Oh my God, this is going to hurt” expression. 2005 was more of a cricketing miracle but 2015 has been schadenfreude at its delicious best.”
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WICKET! Australia 243-9 (Hazlewood b Wood 0)
There are more false strokes than, er, non-false strokes at the moment. Batting would be fiendishly difficult for Bradman and Smyth, never mind Hazlewood and Voges, such is the amount of movement. And there you go! Hazlewood is cleaned up by a glorious inswinging yorker from Mark Wood! England are one wicket away from a wonderful victory.
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68th over: Australia 242-8 (Voges 48, Hazlewood 0) Despite bowling very well at times, Stokes had taken only nine wickets in eight-and-a-half Tests since his recall in the Caribbean. Now he has six in an innings. This thing of ours never ceases to fascinate. Stokes is hooping it both ways and beats Hazlewood both on the inside and the outside. He isn’t just making the ball talk; he’s getting it to recite Shakespeare. Another maiden.
Great tweet, this.
In Australia's last four innings: Anderson 6-47, Finn 6-79, Broad 8-15, Stokes 6-35*.... #Teameffort #Ashes2015
— Matthew Kirkham (@Kirkee80) August 8, 2015
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67th over: Australia 242-8 (Voges 48, Hazlewood 0) Wood swerves a peach past Voges’s outside edge. How can you not love Mark Wood? Another maiden.
“I’m in need of an outdoor big screen in central London to watch the last of the match and catch some sun,” says Ben Reilly. “Any chance of asking the OBO faithful for advice?” Is it on at Regent’s Park? In truth, I’d just concentrate on getting some sun - by the time you reach your destination, this will be over.
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66th over: Australia 242-8 (Voges 48, Hazlewood 0) Stokes was just too good for Starc, moving it both ways and eventually drawing an indeterminate push outside off. There is a whiff of 2005 about the way England’s pace attack have relentlessly harassed the Australian batsmen, with the obvious exception of Lord’s. That line from Warner - “every ball felt like my first ball” - sums it up really.
“Controversially, I’d put 2010-11 above 2005 as an England victory,” says Tony Brennan. “2005 was, of course, the ultimate test series, but as a win I think 2010-11 edges it. We were more dominant, and it was in Australia. A series win tucked between two 5-0 losses - that’s pretty extraordinary.”
Interesting. I don’t agree, because the 2005 Australian side was so much better, and a monkey had been growing on England’s back for 18 years, but I do think the emphatic nature of England’s win is underrated. I think I’m right in saying that nobody has ever beaten Australia by an innings three times in a series. Even though it wasn’t a great side, to do that to Australia in Australia was outrageous.
WICKET! Australia 242-8 (Starc c Bell b Stokes 0)
The ball is doing plenty, and Starc is beaten by a ludicrous jaffa from Stokes. The early signs are that this shouldn’t take long. And there’s the first wicket! Starc fences outside off and is taken easily by Bell at second slip. Stokes has six for 35!
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65th over: Australia 242-7 (Voges 48, Starc 0)
Hmmm now told any Michael Clarke confirmation more likely post play. Will speak to Channel 9 (his future employer, one would wager)
— Ali Martin (@Cricket_Ali) August 8, 2015
Wood is bowling a nice full length, trying to tempt Voges into the corridor of certain death. Then, when he drags his length back from full to good, Voges has a nibble and is beaten by a cracker that snaps a long way off the seam. If there is one thing Trevor Bayliss has done, apart from improve the catching and look like a dude under his floppy hat, it is to reinforce the value of a full length. Or maybe Ottis Gibson has done it. Either way, that dunderheaded bowling performance against New Zealand at Headingley feels light years ago. Another maiden.
64th over: Australia 242-7 (Voges 48, Starc 0) Ben Stokes starts at the other end. He was overdue a five-for after all the bad luck he has had with the ball in the last few months; in fact he was overdue a wicket, never mind five of them. A quiet first over, but with some encouraging swing, is a maiden to Starc.
“Would concur with your ranking,” says Phil Rhodes. “2005 has not just daylight but light years, ice ages and any other extravagant time frame measure between that and 2010/11. I’m wondering if this year isn’t close to 2010/11 due to concerns before hand but lack of Ryan Harris prevents that. It could be said his career ending injury has won the Ashes for us. Can you imagine him bowling on this wicket and that one at Edgbaston. Must be said though that wasn’t a smart move to rely on such an injury prone bowler. Exactly the type of thing England kept doing on all those barren tours down under...”
Yes I agree. Not only was he a master, but - like McGrath and Warne - he was simultaneously defensive and attacking. Australia have really missed his control, and Peter Siddle’s. I would definitely have played Siddle here. In 2013-14 they joined the dots until they read W-I-C-K-E-T, but this time England have been scoring at a ridiculous rate. Partly that’s down to their own intent, of course, but it’s also down the bowling.
Here’s our live county cricket blog, with updates from Middlesex v Sussex and Yorkshire v Durham.
63rd over: Australia 242-7 (Voges 48, Starc 0) There are four balls of Mark Wood’s 13th over remaining from last night. How nice it would be if Mark Wood, cult hero and adorable clown, took the Ashes-winning wicket. Mind you, that applies equally to Ben Stokes, Stuart Broad and Steven Finn. When you win the Ashes, every story is a good story. There’s some early, orthodox swing for Wood, even with a ball that is 63 overs old, and just a leg-bye from those four deliveries.
@100ashesquotes interesting juxtaposition of books in my local Kmart. I think they may be on to something… #Ashes2015 pic.twitter.com/0l5zKvFP6F
— well.ian (@faintsaint1) August 8, 2015
Update: Who/what is Simon McMahon? “I’m certainly a guy, and in my mind I’m of average build, a ruggedly handsome, fit 40 something, when in reality I’m like that bloke who was wearing the Beefy T-shirt the other day.” I thought Giant Haystacks passed away in 1998?
David Warner is being interviewed, and has just come up with a great line about the conditions and how well England have bowled. “It’s the first time in my career that I felt like I was facing my first ball every ball.”
Here’s Ali Martin’s story on reports that Michael Clarke is going to jump while simultaneously being pushed.
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“Morning Rob, morning everyone,” says Sarah Morriss. “What a time to be alive. I’m veering between impatience and butterflies. My boss, who’s a good bloke, is at Trent Bridge today so it’d be nice if he got to see *some* play. However, I couldn’t take the spare ticket so screw ‘im.”
In 2015, nothing really counts until it has been ranked. So where do we put this among England’s recent Ashes victories? I’d probably say 2005, daylight, 2010-11, 2015, 2009 and 2013. Any thoughts?
Concentrate hard though Eng. Ideal finish for me would be c Cook b Broad.
— mike selvey (@selvecricket) August 8, 2015
The Australian newspaper running that Michael Clarke has been told ‘there’s no place for him in the team’ & he will retire after the Oval
— Jonathan Agnew (@Aggerscricket) August 8, 2015
On Sky, Mike Atherton has been drawing a parallel between this and the 2013-14 series: two excellent, ageing teams who wrongly thought they had one last tour left in them. It’s a great point. Just as England lost Trott, Pietersen, Prior and Swann in the last Ashes, so Australia have lost Haddin, Harris, Watson and Clarke this time. Those four have over 260 caps between them. Even youngsters who were seen as bankers – Root then, Hazlewood now – were undermined. This thing of ours is a wonderful and cruel thing.
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“Morning Rob,” chirps Simon McMahon. “So, it’s 99.94% certain that England will regain the Ashes today. And yet. And yet ... It was also seemingly certain that Bradman would finish his career with a Test average of over 100. And that after Trent Bridge in 1993 Martin McCague would take 500 Test wickets. Ach, stuff it. There’s more chance of the Central African Republic winning the next World Cup than there is of England not winning today. Right? RIGHT?”
Come and sit on the couch, big guy, and give me a hug. It’s going to be okay.
(Full disclosure: I have no idea whether Simon McMahon is indeed big, or even a guy; I suspect he’s probably a small guy. I just like the phrase.)
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Michael Clarke to retire?
This is sad but increasingly inevitable news. He has been worn down by his back and now his team’s lack of spine, not to mention the unimaginable trauma of Philip Hughes’s death. It’s hard to know how history will judge Michael Clarke – both around the world and in Australia. He touched greatness with the bat, most obviously during an astonishing 2012, and has been a brilliant captain don’t mention the F-word don’t mention the F-word who, at his best, reads games like he has written them. At his best, with the bat or in the field, he was an outstanding advert for instinct. But there has also been a strong sense that Australia didn’t quite trust him for a long time; that he was – heaven forbid – a bit metrosexual. Having never met him, it’s impossible to say whether that’s fair, or whether he uses hair products. All in all, he’s had a unique career, and a largely brilliant one.
Michael Clarke to retire from Test cricket say reports in Australia (from England)
— Ali Martin (@Cricket_Ali) August 8, 2015
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Preamble
September 12, 2005. August 23, 2009. December 29, 2010. August 5, 2013. August 8, 2015. These are the dates on which England have regained or retained the Ashes in the last 25 years. Forget all that real-life stuff like childbirth, weddings and the first time you practised the physical act of love; these are the dates of our lives. The Ashes-winning days.
Admittedly I had to look up the precise dates up for 2009, 2013 and even 2015 –and 2013 was a bit of a damp squib for a variety of reasons – but the point remains: for those who received the questionable gift of caring about the England cricket team early in life, today will be taking out a lease in the memory bank.
It’s the kind of day on which life is to be worn at the jauntiest of angles. The kind of day on which, if you leisurely pour a G&T on the train at 11am, demonstratively dropping a slice of lemon to create a zesty splash and draw attention to yourself, everyone will look at you with envy rather than sympathy, and they will say: this is no breakfast wino, this is an England cricket fan!
As is usually the case when England win at cricket, some are looking for caveats. Forget all those distractions. Forget that Australia have sometimes batted like Ilford 2nds at both ends; forget the unsettling weirdness of back-to-back two-and-a-half day Tests; forget that the first half of the series was so wildly unpredictable that it was like watching Pakistan play Pakistan. All that is for tomorrow. Today is about celebrating a thrilling achievement from a highly likeable young side – a victory which, as in 2009, should significantly empower an emerging team.
It’s only a month since 95 per cent of pundits said England would be tonked 3-1 or worse. It’s only 20 months since England suffered – or rather had inflicted upon them – what was arguably the most emphatic mental disintegration in the history of sport. To get from there to here is a triumph for so many people, from Trevor Bayliss to Andrew Strauss to Paul Farbrace to Brendon McCullum to Mr B. O. Cricket to all the players – particularly Joe Root, who has gone from being strokeless, lost, and dropped in Sydney to the world’s No1 batsman, as the ICC Rankings will surely confirm tomorrow.
Most of all this, this is a triumph for Alastair Cook. To say he behaved with abnormal dignity and resilience during the never-ending storms of 2014 doesn’t begin to do him justice. Straight after the 5-0, on the outfield in Sydney, Cook said: “I have a feeling this will be good for us in the long run.” It was probably said more in hope than in expectation; but when he uttered those words, he had one thing in mind: the beautiful catharsis of August 8, 2015.
(Obviously if Australia do a Headingley 1981 you can stick this introduction up your jumper, but it’s not going to happen, is it?)
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