SURPRISE, Ariz. _ Jim Crane has two of the things many others would crave having.
He is wildly rich, a billionaire, and also carries a single-digit handicap on the golf course, a low single-digit.
Bang loudly on a trash can if you would like to have both of those things.
That's a lot of banging.
He also has ownership of an MLB franchise and big ol' World Series ring from the 2017 Houston Astros' run to the title.
And he's not apologizing for either one of those things.
Oh, he apologized Thursday morning in Florida, saying how sorry he was that the Astros illicitly stole signs during the 2017 season. But that was all he offered an apology for, the actual breaking of rules, and nothing else.
Then, during the very same news conference, he said the high-tech, garbage-can banging stealing wasn't a factor in the Astros winning the World Series and that championship still sparkles like all the diamonds on that ring.
And, don't forget, Crane wasn't responsible for the scheme. He said so himself.
He might as well have been wearing that ring on his middle finger.
His poorly orchestrated apology came across as insincere the longer he talked. So, too, did the statements star players Alex Bregman and Jose Altuve read before exiting stage left.
The Astros are ready to move on, they said.
Yeah, move on from the fuss. The only thing they're sorry for is that they got caught cheating like no team has cheated before.
But that World Series title is still a World Series title, at least in their minds.
Even the ones who came across as the most contrite still protected the title as legitimate.
No one is going to be able to take that away from them, even the one person who could take it away from them _ MLB commissioner Rob Manfred. And he's not happy with the hollow apologies, either.
He would have a lot of support if that were to happen, and it might help smell a little better than many think he does now.
The punishments weren't harsh enough to some. The players skated, even though he said in his report it was a player-driven scheme. The Astros kept their title, as he himself said it was impossible to determine if it helped them win the championship.
Now that the Astros are on the record _ finally _ others around baseball seem inclined to go on the record, too. That title is horse feathers.
Or something like that.
Oh, if the Astros thought their one-stop Apology Tour would put a stop to the scandal, they're sorely mistaken.
It will come up in every city they visit, against every team they play, and probably in their ribs against some pitchers who feel they were wronged in 2017.
That's not a call for head hunting. Just an educated guess. Players police their game when they think it needs policing.
The policing they've seen so far hasn't been strong enough.
Meanwhile, Crane will be sipping tea or wine or John Dalys at the 19th hole, lamenting his club choice on No. 8 but toasting his back-to-back birdies at No. 12 and 13.
He might even buy a round for his playing partners, and let them try on his World Series ring.
It's still shiny and meaningful following the Astros' one-stop Apology Tour, at least in his mind.
