The alarm clock drags you vindictively from a troubled slumber. There is little hot water and less milk. Because your umbrella is less functional than it should be, drizzle soaks the bottom of your trousers and a half-pint of rain finds its way into your shoes.
The bus is rammed and tube etiquette has been abandoned. And then the creature in front of you at the coffee shop insists on ordering a banquet for 40 rather than a single cappuccino.
As the rain streaks down the office window and you stare down the barrel of yet another week of drudgery, you find yourself suffused with an even keener sense of dread than usual. Welcome to Blue Monday.
According to psychologists, a combination of filthy weather, financial strains and shattered new year's resolutions has conspired to make today the most depressing day of the year. How, then, to get through it all?
The people at ActionAid say that a survey they commissioned shows people are happiest when helping those in need. With that in mind, the charity is attempting to spread a little cheer through the City of London today using space hoppers, smoothies and massages. There is also talk of fluffy blue monsters, although it's not immediately clear how they fit in to proceedings.
If you're not in London – or the thought of space hoppers serves only to deepen the misery – ActionAid is peddling some other tips gleaned from their poll. Apart from boosting your mood by helping others, it recommends: receiving an unexpected compliment; listening to the sea; sitting in the sunshine (hmmm); listening to music; eating your favourite food; hearing laughter; winning money; going for a walk on the beach; and having a snowball fight.
Others, meanwhile, are offering their own tips, which range from lovebombing your partner to padding round the office barefoot.
What would you recommend? A duvet day? A touch of New Order? Or is it simply a matter of ignoring dubious formulae and getting on with things?
We leave you with this bolstering thought: not everyone agrees that today is Blue Monday. That joy, apparently, is still a week away.
