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The Independent UK
The Independent UK
Health
Olivia Petter

Andrew Scott says using the term 'casual sex' can be 'really dangerous because it invokes shame in people'

AFP via Getty Images

Andrew Scott has revealed he dislikes the term “casual sex“ because it can make people feel shameful about their sex lives.

Speaking on the podcast “How to Fail with Elizabeth Day”, the Fleabag actor dismantled what the phrase really means and argued that it could be “really dangerous”.

“The idea that you can’t extract any kind of meaning from casual sex... I think that’s really dangerous because it invokes shame in people,” Scott said.

The 43-year-old actor added that casual sex can be meaningful and “really important”.

“You learn from people,” he said. “It’s not about the length of time you spend with somebody.”

Scott went on to praise Fleabag, in which he played the “hot priest” character, for addressing the subject of casual sex.

“In a way, that’s what Fleabag is about,” he said, referencing his character’s relationship with Phoebe Waller-Bridge’s eponymous protagonist in season two of the BBC show.

“You can have incredibly potent, lifelong effects from meeting somebody over two weeks, or one week, or, you know, three hours. You go, oh my god I learned something.

“I think if you’re going through that situation where you’re having casual sex with people, sometimes that’s what you need to do.” 

Scott added that casual sex can be key to “understanding our sexuality” and having discussions about intimacy that could be seen as “taboo”.

“You have to be able to make mistakes and you have to find out who you are,” he continued before going on to quote relationships therapist and podcast host Esther Perel, whom he described as one of his “heroes”.

“She says this great thing about the beginning of long-term relationships to ‘bring your kinks early’, which I think is really such a wonderful thing.”

Scott continued: “It just means to have an understanding in the same way you have tastes in what kind of furniture you might buy that you go, ‘this is what I like’.”

You can listen to the full podcast episode here.

The Independent's Millennial Love group is the best place to discuss to the highs and lows of modern dating and relationships. Join the conversation here.​

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