The colonic irrigation of English rugby starts today. That, at least, is the intention in central London this morning when Rob Andrew and his Club England committee colleagues discuss who should assume control of the national team and how best to tackle the wider issues which have weakened the 2003 world champions. If Andrew can diagnose the right treatment, the Rugby Football Union grandees will no doubt slap each other proudly on the back and toast their wisdom in employing him.
If only it were that simple. The first item should be clarifying the blurred definition of Andrew's role as the RFU's elite rugby director because everything hinges on it. Is he supposed to be a visionary desk man, or a hands-on team manager? If the former, he should assess the candidates for a managerial role and, crucially, relinquish his selectorial vote. Alternatively, to minimise the chance of another hasty mistake, he could yet do a temporary u-turn by recommending himself as Andy Robinson's replacement until the World Cup. For the sake of the English game, his peers insist, he cannot have it both ways.
Take Andrew's predecessor Chris Spice, who resigned in April when Robinson was retained in the first of this year's managerial culls. Speaking from Singapore yesterday, Spice offered no shortage of pertinent advice. Andrew's gambit should be to reform Club England - or certainly the parts which voted to keep Robinson last time. At the very least he should also demand a seat on the management board which is to consider Club England's deliberations on December 20. Crazily Andrew still answers to the blazers. Only if that anachronism is ended will England find a way through the fog of obfuscation.
"A whole range of things need to change," sighed Spice, an Australian who made his name in hockey administration before becoming the RFU's performance director. "For a start I don't think Club England is the group which should be discussing the head coach. The appointment process is all wrong. Rob should be the chairman of the panel appointing the coach. It's about time Club England realised the professional game has passed them by. They're paying Rob a lot of money, they've got to let him do the job."
But, assuming that happens, what next? "English rugby needs to look at where it wants to be in 10 years rather than employing a quick slap of paint," warned Spice, blaming corporate greed for a large chunk of Twickenham's problems. "One of the unfortunate things about winning the World Cup was that it made people think everything was OK. It was never OK. That was an exceptional bunch of players at an exceptional time. Unless something is done, I believe the game in England is at breaking point. The only time people take notice is when England start doing badly."
Around the clubs they are saying much the same. Even the coach of the champions Sale Sharks, Kingsley Jones, recognises change must come if his players are not to become burnt-out zombies. "If I was England coach, I'd want more time with the players. I may be shooting myself in the foot but I think they should pay the majority of the Test players' salaries and make them available for 16 games at pre-arranged times."
But who should be that head coach? Rumours abound that Robinson, in the latter days, was viewed as a bit of a spare part by several players. If true, why replace him? "If it was me, I'd stick with what they've got and promote either John Wells or Brian Ashton, and leave Rob in a Clive Woodward-type role," argued Jones.
Spice also rates Ashton and Wells highly but is not entirely convinced either would enjoy all the high-profile aspects of the No1 job. Fascinatingly, one of his last acts at Twickenham was to recommend a team manager to replace Robinson. His two suggestions? Andrew and Dean Richards. "Andy was a coach, not a manager, and I believe that's a position that's been missing. If Rob steps away and allows the coach to get on with it, which I think he's bright enough to do, England can certainly improve. But what you can't do is select teams by committee. It's like going back to the 70s. Sure, the head coach will have his sounding boards but he has to have the final say."
If that means a call for Richards, director of rugby at Harlequins, Spice could well be proved right, assuming Warren Gatland is unavailable. Graham Henry? The RFU has more chance of employing Thierry Henry. There is one wild card, though, the former Wallaby coach Eddie Jones, who has offered himself short term. "A short fix of something bright, new and different might just spark the players off and give a rise in performance," said Spice. "I don't think it's all doom and gloom." There is plenty for Andrew and friends to mull over.
