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Bored Panda
Bored Panda
Monika Pašukonytė

“AITA For Calling Off My Wedding Because My Fiancé Wanted His Ex To Cater The Event?”

Marriage is a huge commitment because you take a vow to stay with this person for the rest of your life, so getting cold feet before a wedding makes sense. However, you wouldn’t jump into it when you are not over your ex, right?

Wrong! For there are some people who do that and ruin the life of the person they are marrying. Netizens felt that the original poster’s (OP) fiancé is one such person after he hired his ex as a caterer for their wedding. Here’s what the shocked bride did when he called her insecure…

More info: Reddit

Shockingly enough, some people jump into marriage with someone even when they’re not over their ex

Image credits: freepik / Freepik (not the actual photo)

The poster is getting married to her boyfriend of 2 years and he’s the one who hired the wedding caterer due to past experience

Image credits:

Image credits: freepik / Freepik (not the actual photo)

A twist in the tale is that his cousin told the bride that this caterer is the groom’s ex whom he dated for 4 years before the poster

Image credits:

Image credits: freepik / Freepik (not the actual photo)

She told her fiance that they have to change the caterer, but he refused to budge to her request and even called her insecure and immature

Image credits:

The bride is heartbroken that he didn’t respect her boundaries, so she called off the wedding, but folks are calling her “petty”

Today’s story is dripping with wedding drama that no one saw coming, all thanks to the groom. Reddit user HoneyMoondro is the bride, and the bridal couple have been together for 2 years. When it came to hiring a caterer for the event, the groom was quick to finalize one he had worked with before, and the poster didn’t really think much of it.

However, all hell broke loose when his cousin told her that the caterer is in fact the groom’s ex-girlfriend! That’s not the worst part of the story, for the twist is that when she confronted her fiancé, he refused to change the caterer. What’s more, he also had the audacity to call the poster “insecure and immature” when she suggested hiring another good one.

After this display of a giant red flag, the couple’s conflict stretched for days to no avail. OP just couldn’t fathom why he was dismissing her feelings and not even respecting her boundaries. I don’t know about you, but all I can think is that if this is how he’s acting now, imagine what their future after marriage looks like. Seems pretty dire, doesn’t it?

Probably the poster might have thought along the same lines, for she decided to call off the wedding. She’s already heartbroken about it, but what troubles her more is that his family and even her siblings are now calling her “petty” for throwing away a great relationship. Confused by everything, she vented online, and Redditors assured her that the groom is the petty one in the story!

Image credits: New Africa / Freepik (not the actual photo)

To get deeper insights into this complicated story, Bored Panda reached out to Eden Lobo, a counselor and psychology professor. She stressed that it’s never really “just business” when someone wants their ex involved in their wedding. As per her, weddings are super personal and emotional; it’s not just some random event. 

“Even if someone swears it’s all professional, when the ex is front and center (like catering the whole thing!), that is going to feel weird, and that’s totally fair,” Prof. Lobo explained. “It’s not about being jealous or insecure, it’s about boundaries and respect. If your partner brushes off your feelings by saying ‘you’re being dramatic’ or ‘it’s no big deal,’ that’s a red flag.”

She believes that in a healthy relationship, both people’s comfort matters, and it’s not asking too much to want your big day to be ex-free. Our expert also claimed that labeling someone as “immature” or “insecure” kind of puts them in a box. She added that it avoids actually engaging with why they feel the way they do, and that’s not just dismissive, it’s a power move.

“Concerns should be met with compassion, even if there’s disagreement between a couple. Saying things like ‘help me understand why this bothers you’ is way better than ‘you’re being ridiculous.’ Dismissing it can shake their sense of emotional safety in the relationship. Even if the ex is just there “professionally,” the other partner might start questioning their place in the relationship,” Prof. Lobo concluded.

Well, looks like OP took the right decision by dumping the red flag, right? Even Redditors felt so. What about you? Let us know your thoughts in the comments!

Netizens assured her that it’s his loss, not hers, as the groom seemed like a massive red flag who is still into his ex

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