LEXINGTON, Ky. — Paula Parrish struggles to breathe as she adjusts her oxygen tubes with a mask over her face.
It's been months since she was discharged from the hospital, but she's still in a fight with the long-haul effects of COVID-19. She turned 81 years old on Dec. 15.
She was still "boogieing" when she turned 80, driving family members wherever they needed to go and carrying on with her life. Growing up in a family where the grandparents lived well into their 90s, she didn't think there would ever be a question that she would make it to 81.
One week after her birthday, as she sat in the recliner to which she's often confined because she can hardly walk, her family admitted that over the past few months, they feared she wouldn't get this far.
"We thought we were losing her," said Heather Parrish, Paula's daughter.
Heather, her father, Gorman, and Paula contracted COVID-19. They live together, along with Heather's son Billy Jude. The lingering coronavirus has caused the family hospital visits, financial strife and a seemingly endless procession of "life-and-death decisions."
Heather was the first to get COVID-19 in July. While she was recovering, her 77-year-old father got sick, too.
While his wife would later celebrate her birthday as an achievement in her road to recovery, his birthday, on July 16, wasn't the same. It was the day he tested positive for COVID-19.
The family's two-story home turned into a coronavirus hot spot.
"You think 'well, maybe it's not going to be that bad,'" Gorman said. But it was.
Gorman lost his appetite and felt very weak, he said. He's a cancer survivor with diabetes and pancreatitis. The family ultimately decided not to take him to a hospital. He stayed quarantined at home, and they treated his symptoms as best they could.
"He was downstairs quarantined in his bedroom, I was up in my bedroom, so that left my mom to care for my son and our whole family and two very, very sick people," Heather said.
Just as Gorman seemed like he was improving, Paula started "severely declining," Heather said. At first, the family thought she was exhausted from taking care of two sick adults and a school-age child. But she was suffering from coronavirus symptoms — low oxygen, fever and hallucinations.
When it became apparent that Paula had COVID-19, the family tried to take care of her as well. The virus wasn't done with Heather, but she became the family caretaker.
"We were absolutely terrified," Heather said.
Paula's condition continued to worsen, and even though the family feared the outcome, they decided the hospital was their best choice. She checked into Baptist Health Lexington in early September, Heather said. They were greeted by medical staff in hazmat suits.
"It looked like they were getting ready to take off to outer space or something," Paula said.
She was whisked into the COVID-19 unit and closed off from the outside world. With masks and breathing tubes covering her face, she communicated with her doctor through a glass window using a telephone. Her family coped with the separation, trying to exchange text messages with her only to get jumbled responses.
The family was worried about her mental state. But that seemed to change one day when a nurse took an iPad into Paula's room so that she could see her daughter's face.
"She lit up, and that honestly was the turning point for her," Heather said.
Paula, described by her daughter as a "warrior woman," contended that she didn't get down about her condition.
"I wasn't afraid," she said. "I didn't feel apprehensive."
Paula was more worried about her family. She missed them and didn't want the hospitalization to be hard on them.
After a month and a half of hospital treatment and two negative COVID-19 tests, Paula was transferred to Cardinal Hill Hospital in mid-October to begin therapy. She was rushed back to her room just a few minutes into her first session due to fears she would pass out, she said.
On top of the therapy, she was getting shots in her stomach to avoid blood clots. Caregivers were waking her up throughout the night to monitor her. She was taking more medicine than she could fathom.
"Oh my God, I don't know how much medication I had."
She returned home, and with the help of at-home care, she has since been discharged from physical therapy, occupational therapy and speech therapy.
As Heather's older parents try to recover from long-term coronavirus symptoms, like breathing problems, she cares for them while dealing with virus aftereffects herself.
"The long-term effects have been so damaging to everyone in the family," she said.
Paula's oxygen levels drop every time she stands or sits up, Heather said.
Paula has frequent doctor visits, both in-person and virtual. Meanwhile, Gorman was still much weaker than he was before the infection. His doctor told him he couldn't go on walks alone, so he tries to walk around the house and on the family's property.
Mental health has become a major focus in the Parrish household. The effects of quarantining and missing Paula while she was hospitalized took a toll on every family member. Gorman only saw his wife twice in more than two months.
"You're struggling all the time," he said.
Gorman began therapy sessions with Beaumont Behavioral Health, which connected him with someone else who had been through a lot due to COVID-19. He attends virtually and over the phone, and the sessions have helped a lot, he said.
Heather was worried her father was suffering from depression while he was isolated in his room.
And Heather's caretaking responsibilities have left her in a "constant state of stress and anxiety that doesn't go away."
"There's so much going on here other than just the virus itself," Heather said.
She's been thankful for Billy Jude, her 10-year-old son. He stepped up to help the family and did everything he could to make life easier.
"I don't know if I could have gotten through this without this kiddo," Heather said.
The 10-year-old had already been dealing with virtual schoolwork this year. In addition to his usual chores — taking out the trash and cleaning his room — he took on monitoring his grandmother's oxygen and taking meals to his grandparents while they sat in quarantine.
Billy Jude said his experience with COVID-19 has been that "it makes things feel so much more dull."
There's also the financial cost. The medical supplies needed for long-haul care have mounted to more than $1,000, Heather said, and she's often unclear on what insurance and Medicare will cover. Heather hasn't been able to work.
She's relied on expanded unemployment insurance made available when the pandemic hit, she said.
Paula's recent medical examinations have been encouraging. She recently found out her lungs were clear, and she said her doctors haven't seen troubling signs in MRIs and other tests. But the family hasn't been able to move on from the virus yet.
Paula is still confined to one floor of the house. She goes between a bed in the front room, her recliner in the living room and a first-floor bathroom. She struggles to walk even with a walker. She hopes people will see her experience and take the pandemic seriously before facing similar circumstances.
"I feel very upset, and frankly annoyed when I see people making remarks about it being a hoax," Paula said.
