Spin of the week
Securing an election was a confusing business, so let’s just remind ourselves how we got here. A week ago the Conservatives wanted an election, but Labour, who had been demanding an election, opposed an election. The Liberal Democrats and the Scottish National party had agreed they didn’t want an election, but then said they did want an election three days before the Tories wanted an election. But the Tories wouldn’t have an election then, and anyway, some Lib Dems and SNP MPs started to worry about having an election. But none of that mattered because Labour, having not wanted an election, decided it did want one after all. Got it?
Gaffe of the week
This election is a huge strategic error by the Tories. Or Labour. Maybe both? What we can say for sure is, at least one of them has definitely made a terrible mistake – we just don’t know who or why. But don’t worry. After the results come in, various panels of experts will tell us why this was the obvious and – yes – inevitable outcome.
Revelation of the week
Surprise! We’re still in the EU. It means that, unbelievably, Boris Johnson’s pledge to “die in a ditch” over leaving the EU by the end of October wasn’t 100% true. As with most Johnson predictions, it was unerring in its complete inaccuracy, sitting neatly alongside his past observation that his chances of becoming PM were as good as being “reincarnated as a baked bean”. He may not come back as baked bean, but with Johnson in charge of Brexit, we are all more likely to be living on them soon enough.
Theme of the week
Departures. Lots of them. There are some political heavyweights leaving the Commons such as Ken Clarke, Oliver Letwin and Amber Rudd. Yet there are some lesser lights also calling it a day. In unrelated news, David Tredinnick, the Tory MP for Bosworth, is stepping down. Tredinnick is best known for advocating the use of astrology to take the pressure off the NHS (he’s a Capricorn; they have a wacky sense of humour). His interest in homeopathy also saw colleagues dub him the “honourable member for Holland & Barrett”. Will we see his like again? The sun in Scorpio suggests ... hopefully not.
Claim of the week
Plaid Cymru is off to a flyer in the mad pledges stakes. With the Welsh rugby team dumped out of the World Cup by South Africa, the party said Wales “would be more likely to win” the competition under a Plaid government. The plan appears to have something to do with grassroots investment, but holding a breakaway competition and only involving countries that start with “W” may be more effective.
Campaign of the week
With blue collar voters seen as key to the Tories’ chances of success, Johnson did his best “man of the people” impression by launching his election campaign from the back of a chauffeur-driven car. Next up, Jacob Rees Mogg is due to demonstrate the government’s plan for the arts by making his nanny and butler act out the final scene of Shakespeare’s Henry IV Part I. Who says this lot aren’t the vox populi?
Good week
Pollsters
In a case of entirely convenient mass amnesia, we will all forget how pollsters misread the last election, the referendum before that and the election before that. Polls will be pored over, tweeted, gasped at and declared key moments. Then there will be a surprise result. Can’t wait for the inquiry.
Bad week
Workington Man (and Woman)
With the Cumbrian town identified by a thinktank as a key battleground, pity the voters of Workington as they’re stopped during a Christmas shopping trip by gaggles of journalists, desperately asking them if Labour’s latest announcement on regional development banks has tipped the seat back in Jeremy Corbyn’s favour. They just want to get the last walking Buzz Lightyear in stock, people. Have some pity!
A quick look at the election markets
Johnson is up, completing the opening week with a double-digit lead. But the NHS was a hot topic, giving Labour hope. Having precipitated the election, the Lib Dems are battling to ensure it doesn’t become a two-horse race. Game on!
