Without wishing to appear overly pedantic, I thought the title of Channel 4’s latest royal documentary might have benefitted from a small tweak.
Most of the babies featured in A Very Royal Baby : From Cradle to Crown will be lucky to get anywhere near the crown.
Even the ones who are scheduled to have a shot at the throne one day will have a very long wait.
In fact, the way things are going, will there still be a crown by the time young Prince George has reached the front of the queue? That’s what this documentary was really interested in. The crisis that is currently engulfing the Windsors.
The baby angle was simply an excuse to talk about the royal squad’s most interesting members, Meghan and Harry.
The only surprise was that it was on Channel 4, which normally takes a rather more grand and academically flavoured approach to royal documentaries.
I can only assume those in charge had become fed up of watching Channel 5 hoover up the royal gossip fans and had opted for an “if you can’t beat ‘em” approach.
I hope it’s an approach that fails. If it doesn’t, before long we could well be treated to the likes of Paul Hollywood’s Royal Fruitcakes, Kevin McCloud’s Grand Royal Designs and Beatrice and Eugenie on Royal Gogglebox (actually, I’d watch that last one).
Who knows, we could even see Prince Andrew in Dictionary Corner one day.
Given Countdown’s viewing figures, it’s as good a place to hide as any.
What Channel 4 will have quickly realised is that the royal talking head pool is a shallow one – in every sense.
So it was no surprise to see that this hour of baby talk featured many of the usual suspects.
Paul Burrell (who, I believe, used to work for Princess Diana) and author Ingrid Seward appeared to be involved in a battle to see who could be the most snide about Meghan.
Seward stormed to victory in the end.
Her bizarre fury at Meghan and Harry not revealing the identity of Archie’s godparents was only bettered by her assessment of Meghan’s appearance in the days immediately after Archie’s birth: “She hadn’t lost her baby weight like Catherine had. She still looked very mumsy.”
Yeah, Megs. Time to raise your game.
Get a treadmill installed in the delivery suite this time, eh?
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