Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson returns to screens in "Fast & Furious Presents: Hobbs & Shaw," an impressively double-ampersanded title that suggests that the "Fast & Furious" franchise is now just lying around waving a hand and "presenting" things, like an imperious spokesmodel. There is, of course, nothing laid-back about the "F & F" franchise, in which people do things like steal cars from speeding trains, and which will cause you to drive home in your sad little Honda feeling very non-badass.
In honor of the return of Luke Hobbs, the impossible-to-kill character Johnson's now played in five increasingly and enjoyably frenetic installments (the last one was so fast and furious it even had Helen Mirren in a cameo), here's a quick appreciation of the massive wrestler-turned-actor. Johnson always plays more or less the same character _ and he always saves the day.
The men Johnson plays are masters of transportation. There is nothing that a character played by Johnson can't drive. (In 2010's "Faster," his character is appropriately named "Driver.") While he mostly sticks with cars in the "F & F" movies _ which he drives with a cool nonchalance, like the vehicle is a mild annoyance that must be dealt with _ he is also good with helicopters ("San Andreas," "Rampage"), boats ("San Andreas"), construction cranes ("Skyscraper"), taxis ("Return to Witch Mountain"), and, probably, Quidditch brooms, unicycles and space shuttles. Just wait.
Johnson's characters have superhuman powers. To my knowledge, Johnson has never played an actual superhero, but he nonetheless can fly. Watch him in "Skyscraper," jumping from said construction crane _ a mere mortal would plummet, but Johnson soars. (To be fair, he tries something similar in "The Other Guys" and things don't work out quite so well, but that was 2010 and he wasn't quite as big a star yet. Superpowers take time.) He is also an animal whisperer ("Rampage"), a manly time traveler ("Jumanji: Welcome to the Jungle"), and a person capable of redirecting a torpedo with one hand ("Fate of the Furious"). Somebody give this man a cape. Oh, and my editor wants me to add that he is capable of doing distracting gyrations with his pectoral muscles ("Journey 2: The Mysterious Island"), as shown in a clip (titled "Pec Pop of Love!") from the film. I ... might have watched this video.
They cannot be contained. If you are a character played by Dwayne Johnson, and you are in a hospital with your arm in a cast and you want to get back to action, you simply flex your muscles and off pops the cast, just like that. (This happens in "Furious 7," but I bet Johnson does it at parties.) If you try to imprison him, he will throw the guards around like tennis balls ("Fate of the Furious"); if you think an earthquake of massive proportions can stop him from saving his family AND getting his ex-wife back while he's at it ("San Andreas"), you haven't seen enough of his movies.
They always know what to say. Let's be honest here: Johnson is not the most nuanced actor working today. (His range is basically a combination of Seething Wide-Eyed Glare, Serious I-Got-You Nod and Quietly Smoldering Intensity, interspersed with the odd roguish grin.) But this is a man who can assure a child who's about to walk across a plank 100 stories above Hong Kong that everything will be OK (it's in "Skyscraper"), and you believe him, absolutely. This is also a man who, in "Furious 7," announces his arrival with "Woman, I am the cavalry." Bow down.
In case of disaster, he's your man. I've said it before and I'll say it again, but when the apocalypse comes, I hope I'm standing near The Rock. Because he will not only prevail against all odds (Enormous mutant animals! Towers aflame! Tsunami! Vin Diesel!), but he will make you feel better while he does it. This is Johnson's great gift as a performer: he's a charmer whose charisma is as big as his biceps ... and that is pretty big indeed.
