Living with someone—even someone you love—can be difficult if that person has a totally different understanding of what “clean” and “tidy” mean.
That seemed to be the case with this redditor and her boyfriend, who believed that his dirty laundry didn’t have to be put in the washing machine. Needless to say, his girlfriend found that quite annoying, but eventually, she came up with a way to get him to pick up after himself.
Scroll down to find the full story below, where you will also find Bored Panda’s interview with the OP herself, who was kind enough to share some more details with us.
Living with someone who has a completely different understanding of cleanliness can be difficult
Image credits: ughnowhy (not the actual photo)
This woman couldn’t make peace with her boyfriend’s dirty underwear on the floor
Image credits: GSR-PhotoStudio (not the actual photo)
Image credits: TiffAny3733
“It still hurts that so little effort was made by him,” the woman told Bored Panda
During the recent interview with Bored Panda, the OP shared that what upset her the most was feeling that her needs and comfort were being neglected by her partner. “Even if it was forgetfulness and not a direct way to ignore my request itself, it still hurts that so little effort was made by him to literally just get up for five seconds.
“A little bit of understanding wouldn’t hurt, too, as it was extremely stressful for me to one day just move out of my house and to a foreign country. I didn’t need more on my shoulders at the time.”
The woman revealed that the decision to get petty revenge on her boyfriend was a rather spontaneous one. “My thinking was that I can’t communicate effectively the normal way and he spends most of the time with his friends on Discord, so why not try to communicate through them.
“I wasn’t expecting them to remember it that well; a year after that, he mentioned that they still make fun of him occasionally. But, oh well, he is apparently the type of person that does need constant reminders, so I guess it all worked out in the end,” the redditor said, adding that she sincerely hopes her now ex-boyfriend is happy wherever he is and that he meets a suitable partner for himself in the future.
“Maybe it’s worth mentioning that he did have ADHD, but so do I,” the woman noted. “I never put anything aside for doing later, cause I know that I’m gonna forget. It’s all about understanding your difficulties and trying to work a way through them, not ignoring them when they affect your loved ones.”
Moving in together is quite a big milestone in a couple’s relationship
Living with someone who’s not on the same page about chores and cleanliness as you are can be a pain for both; in such situations, one person is unhappy with having to constantly nag the other, while said other is unhappy being constantly nagged. But the heart wants what it wants—people don’t always couple up with those who see eye to eye on everything. And that’s where compromise and teamwork comes into play.
Talking about the challenges that often arise when couples decide to move in together, founder and clinical director of Psychotherapy for Young Women, Claudia Giolitti-Wright, MA, LMFT, emphasized that deciding to share a home with a partner is one of the most important milestones in a relationship, but also, one of the biggest tests.
“While it often symbolizes commitment and deepening intimacy, it also brings a lot of unspoken expectations, habits, and personal differences to the surface,” the expert told The Knot, adding that the best way to navigate the challenges that come with moving in together is intentional communication, flexibility, and a mindset of teamwork.
“Moving in together isn’t about finding the ‘perfect’ way to live; it’s about creating a shared space that reflects both of your needs and values,” Giolitti-Wright noted. “The couples who thrive are the ones who see challenges not as signs of incompatibility, but as opportunities to grow together.”
Some people move in with their partners because it makes financial sense
For many couples, choosing to live under the same roof is part of the natural progression of their relationship. For some, so is marriage; however, nowadays, many couples choose to move in together before they say “I do.” According to Pew Research Center’s data from 2019, roughly half a decade ago already, the share of people who have ever lived with a romantic partner was higher than the share of people who have ever been married.
According to the aforementioned source, most people—as much as 73%—moved in with their partner led by love, and just over 60% did seek companionship or want to make a formal commitment. But nearly 40% moved in together because it made financial sense—a reason that remains as—if not more—relevant to this day.
A 2023 survey carried out by Realtor.com and HarrisX found that as much as 63% of adults who have moved in with a romantic partner admitted that their decision was impacted by finances or logistics. For the majority of them, such a decision seemed to have paid off as much as 70% of respondents shared that they were able to save money by deciding to share a home with their partner.
Though, even when it makes sense financially, moving in together should be motivated by more than that. According to Clare Trapasso, executive news editor at Realtor.com, “While the idea of splitting the rent or mortgage can be very attractive, it’s important to have tough conversations with your partner and think through how living together will work before you take the plunge.”
The OP didn’t share whether or not the couple’s decision to move in together was influenced by financial matters at all. She did, however, open up about the fact that the two had quite a long adjustment period trying to establish certain rules and some common ground, part of which was the dirty underwear matter. Unfortunately, after making promises for days, her boyfriend didn’t change his habits, nor did they find another compromise, so eventually, the OP decided to carry out a plan of petty revenge. And judging by the comments under her post, fellow netizens were quite amused by her problem-solving skills.
Fellow netizens shared their thoughts on the woman’s petty revenge
