An overwhelming 93% of women have felt dismissed when seeking medical help, according to a survey by FemTech World.
It’s frustrating—and honestly, unacceptable—that so many still face this kind of treatment.
Just take a look at Reddit, where women are speaking out about being ignored, misdiagnosed, or told their symptoms are “all in their head.” How many more experiences like these will it take before women are finally believed?
#1
The IUD won't hurt, it is just a pinch.
I vomited from the pain and passed out in my car right after.
IntoStarDust:
If you ever have to have a hysterectomy be prepared for the wire brush with no pain meds or numbing agents. That is brutal. So is having a biopsy done of your cervix or uterus. No pain meds back in my day. Women are made to suffer.
Monochromesong:
God I had a uterine biopsy done, and it is easily the worst pain I felt. I screamed even though it only lasted 10 seconds, the nurses let me rest in the room for as long as I needed to get my brain in working order to leave.
I cried in the car, I cried to my husband, and had a whole existential crisis LMAO that pain was no joke!!
Image credits: Handbag_Lady
#2
I had swelling under my chin and my doctor kept calling it a double chin and I would be like I’m not fat. I’m actually underweight why would I be accumulating fat in this specific place and he would say genetics. I asked a couple different doctors. They were very dismissive. Then one day, my mouth was really dry and I couldn’t swallow anything. I went to an urgent care and they x-rayed me. My chin swelling was actually a tumor on my sublingual salivary gland. I needed a major surgery to have it removed. It took 6 months to recovery. Keep advocating for yourself. Mine didn’t end up being cancerous, but what if I had just given up and thought oh I guess I just have some excess chin fat.
lemonlegs2:
12 years to finally get an x-ray confirming exactly what I'd been saying for all those 12 years- it feels like I have a broken bone in my back and the bones are rubbing together.
I was told I should just stretch more. Which is even more ridiculous seeing as I have hypermobile ehlers danlos and have always been insanely flexible.
Image credits: Weak_Pineapple8513
#3
When I was 13 I suddenly got very clumsy and started tripping over nothing and everything. People chalked it up to puberty and my limbs growing-fair enough. A few months later I got severe constant vertigo along with vomiting. I was out of school for an entire semester because I couldn't walk a straight line without throwing up. Several different doctors were consulted and all came back with the diagnosis that I was a hysterical teenage girl and faking it to get out of going to school. Finally I saw an ENT who looked into my ear and discovered... nothing there. And I mean nothing; no ear drum, no inner ear bones, no tissue of any kind. It so happens that the case is Scarlet Fever I had the summer prior had eaten away everything and was still attempting to eat its way into my skull. I lost total hearing in that ear, as well as partial hearing in the other ear, because no doctor bothered to look into my ears when presented with an obvious case of inner ear trouble.
MOONWATCHER404:
So is your inner ear basically a direct hole into your skull? (If I may ask)
IcedMercury (OP):
They caught it before it breached the bone completely but basically my ear is just an empty tunnel that branches off at some point for about an inch toward the skull. I know the length because that side tunnel fills with wax and other gunk that has to be removed by an ENT every once in a while. But I don't know any more specifics on direction or placement inside my head as I've never seen it myself or asked my ENT to sketch it for me.
Image credits: IcedMercury
#4
It took me over 5 years to be diagnosed with PCOS and endometriosis. I had horrible, painful periods, facial hair, and hit all the clinical markers—except I wasn’t overweight. Because of that, I was repeatedly told I “didn’t look like” I had PCOS and dismissed over and over again. Eventually, I convinced a doctor to scan my pelvis. It was textbook PCOS. I ended up needing surgery to remove a giant ovarian cyst, and during that, they discovered I had endometriosis too.
On top of that, I’m high risk for cervical cancer and need regular Pap smears and colposcopies to monitor it. I can honestly say it’s the most painful procedure I’ve ever experienced—and that includes getting an epidural too late and having a natural birth. Still, I haven’t been able to find a doctor willing to perform it under any kind of sedation or pain relief. I keep being told it’s “standard” and “not that bad,” even though it absolutely is.
So… not the same situation exactly, but I deeply feel the frustration and pain of being ignored or minimized.
Fluffy-lotus606:
My ex gave me hpv as an std and it turned into cervical. The colposcopies are absolutely awful. I told my gyno I bleed a lot and she didn’t listen and had to shove her hand up there for 20 minutes after I bled all over the table and floor and everything. I also have PCOS, spent thousands on laser hair removal, etc but I think PCOS also makes you more susceptible to hpv turning into cancer. I have two female cousins on the same side that my grandmother died of ovarian cancer and all three of us have PCOS and have had cervical cancer with super early diagnosis on the lesions because we knew we were high risk.
Image credits: DesignerGazelle3344
#5
I had stage 3 endometriosis and infertility because of it, and had to advocate for myself for years. Was constantly being told, by women doctors, everyone had difficult periods.
Charming_Garbage_161:
I honestly ignored my symptoms bc of stigma about periods. I had stage 3 endo and got a hysterectomy a few years ago. When I first walked into the specialist clinic the lady told me she’d check my pelvic floor real quick to see how bad it is. I have never before or since immediately screamed at someone and scooted away. I am still convinced she did something to make it hurt worse so I could get my hysterectomy through insurance.
Image credits: okanaganboymom
#6
I had a low grade fever for about a month straight and decided to go to the ER. One of the first questions the doctor asked is if I have an STD or if there’s any chance my partner at the time was fooling around. I answered no.
The doctor ended up running a full STD panel before giving me an IV. He eventually sent me home with instructions to take Tylenol to lower my fever.
Ended up being an autoimmune disease 🤦🏻♀️.
book_of_black_dreams:
I also had a doctor run an STD panel on me without my consent as an 18 year old with no s*xual history. Ended up getting a false positive and having unnecessary testing done, which was f**ked up because I already had medical PTSD and it was difficult to do even routine labs. I actually reported her and the state medical board refused to take any action.
Image credits: butterf1y
#7
"Looks like a minor infection, but since you're a lesbian and won't be having children we don't need to treat it."
Image credits: porkchopcindy
#8
I had strange scary symptoms that started when I became an adult after being a fairly healthy child.
Got dismissed for 7 years being told:
"Women are all crazy and can't handle stress!"
"It's all in your head."
"You are young so just deal with it."
"You just don't want to get better."
"I see patients worse off then you so don't come back."
Finally found a Doctor who listened and truly cared and promised to do everything in his power to help me.
Got diagnosed with Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome shortly after.
I hate that it took so long to get an answer and I was really scared the entire time thinking that I might be slowly dying.
DorianPavass:
It took both spinal and internal complications until someone would actually write it down. I had years of soft diagnoses where docs would say "well I think it's EDS but I wasn't trained on that so I'm not comfortable diagnosing it, you need a specialist."
Insurance wouldn't cover the specialist until someone diagnosed me. Which didn't happen until I had an incomplete spinal cord injury (spines don't like being wiggly), sepsis from a bulging organ getting randomly infected, and misdiagnosis of some weird malformation of my liver than made them think I had a fatal disease that I didn't.
All while still a teenager. Then and only then, did someone at a teaching hospital have the balls to write it down.
This was all just before the medical world realized it's not actually a rare disease. They were just doing the equivalent of only calling crushed bones 'broken', and telling the person with a snapped in half bone that they're dramatic, and telling the one with a bad crack that they need intense mental health for their hysteria.
I still can't get the insurance to cover a geneticist to find out if I have mild vascular EDS (likely) or severe hEDS. Because vEDS is rare and insurance refuses to acknowledge my own personal risks. They only care that it's very rare, and it's probably hEDS based on statistics, so they don't want to pay for it. It's been 8 years trying to get it covered.
I'd really like to know considering the lifespan difference.......
Image credits: Medicalstripes
#9
I went to the doctor for extreme abdominal pain, so bad that I could barely walk and had to stop working. They insisted it was lactose intolerance and I was just being dramatic about the pain. I am lactose intolerant, but it doesn't cause pain anywhere near that bad.
Turns out it was appendicitis and I had to be rushed into emergency surgery because I waited so long to go the hospital. The ER doc diagnosed me in 2 seconds after hearing my symptoms which were "classic appendicitis" signs.
LewsTherinIsMine:
When I had appendicitis I had all of the classic signs but had to wait for hours because the ER doctor said I didn’t “look like an appendix patient”.
Image credits: lemmedrawit
#10
Months of feeling off, coming off the back of a cold , turned into chronic night sweats , ab pain, fatigue …. Docs just told me to take antibiotics , i was probably perimenopausal. I’m “fit and healthy at 39 and haven’t ever been to see them in 8 years”. Rash and swollen lymph node popped up and they didn’t deem it relevant to see me in person “just send photos”. When I complained they agreed to see me but just gave me a different antibiotic and stronger antihistamine.
Pushed for bloods finally and saw his face drop the day they came in. Even then , I had to wait for a referral … and during that week I was in and out of A&E with them also dismissing my pain , till a female doc ordered a CT and that’s when they saw everything lit up.
Still took another week and a half on top of that to get my diagnosis (cultures , biopsies etc) : cancer. Hodgkin’s lymphoma stage 4.
But ye know, I didn’t fit any of the criteria for that … so if I hadn’t been in agony and off to A&E…. F**k knows what state id have been in waiting for that haematology referral.
cingalls:
I’m not a doctor but I read a lot of medical science books and before the end of your first sentence I knew you were going to say Hodgkin lymphoma. Your doctor was a flicking moron for not immediately testing.
Image credits: PamVanDam
#11
Had a doctor tell me to rub vitamin E oil on my breast for a breast mass. I had stage 2 breast cancer with spread to my lymph nodes at 34 years old.
Image credits: ElegantAd7178
#12
You're not depressed! You dont need antidepressants! If you just stopped taking birth control you would be fine! As I sat sobbing and s******l in his office begging for help
Edit: he also recommended high dose vitamin supplements and conveniently gave me the address for the website where he sold those supplements as a side gig.
tiptoe_only:
Oh god I'm sorry. Reminds me of the doctor who laughed at me as I tearfully explained how my uncontrollable compulsive eating was wrecking my life, how I couldn't work because my brain wouldn't focus on anything other than food and I couldn't socialise because any event with food and drink was massively triggering. It had been getting steadily worse for two years and had now reached the point where I was off work and essentially housebound with severe anxiety and moderate depression which were both directly caused by my eating disorder.
He said, "Everybody overeats sometimes! I can eat non stop for two days. There's nothing wrong with you, this is not a disease, it's just the way you are!" then refused my pleas to be referred to an ED service and sent me on my way.
Image credits: glassapplepie
#13
In 2012 I was in Walgreens, stepped on an eyeliner pencil that was laying in the floor and fell. I didn't think I was physically hurt at the time, but within a week, my lower back was k**ling me.
I went to my doctor, and he prescribed a muscle relaxer. This went on and on, and my back never got any better. If anything, it hurt more.
I went back to my doctor and explained to him that I didn't think my back pain was from my fall. I thought something else was going on.
He literally rolled his eyes and told me I fell and hurt my back. Nothing else was going on.
I went on to tell him that my dad had "hurt his back" and was being treated for that. Finally, after weeks of not improving, they did an MRI and found out it was actually an aneurysm. And, my sister was also treated for back pain after a fall, only to find out she had cancer.
He acted pissed off. Told me to not be a hypochondriac. This was the first time I had EVER complained about anything to him. He made me feel like I was stupid.
The very next day, I had a gynecologist appointment. She always would question me about my life, what was going on, etc..
She was a great doctor. ( has since retired). I told her about my back. She asked where it hurt, I told her, and she said it might be my kidneys.
She referred me to a urologist. I had " the biggest kidney stone he had ever seen". He told me it was blocking the entrance in my left kidney. He said if I had not came in when I did, I would have lost my kidney.
I fired my pc and told him why.
1127_and_Im_tired:
If you complain of pain and want relief, you're a drug seeking addict. If you complain of pain and don't want to just be given meds, you're attention seeking. There's no winning with some doctors. Ugh.
Image credits: alaskandreamer09
#14
Allow me to share a review I left regarding a visit to this son-of-a-b***h:
*I do not recommend Dr _____*
*I saw him for an enormous hematoma on my breast. He didn't leave the room to allow me to get undressed, nor provide a hospital gown, just had me haul out my breast for a look-see. Unacceptable! He used the words 'flopping' and 'swinging' even though I told him several times that there was NO impact to the breast. Also, as a breast cancer survivor, those are loaded words. I neither flop nor do I swing - my reconstructive surgery was excellent. Also, using words like that on a female patient are like a female doctor calling a male patient 'undersized' or 'flaccid.' Loaded words. He has no people skills, at least where female patients are concerned. Do not get seen by this oaf.*.
stealerofsloths:
I had a male doctor say "don't worry, the walls are sound proofed" before doing a vaginal ultrasound, I was speachless.
Image credits: BlueGrottoMaillot
#15
I am a husband who has to go into the doctor with my non-native English speaking wife, or everything will be ignored.
Not joking. The ER will actually do proper care, but general practitioners and even the specialist we’ve seen just ignore her. If I’m there at least I can push them a bit.
Least-City2300:
I brought my male cousin to a doctor’s appointment once and introduced him as my fiance.
I talked to my cousin in advance and told him I was having a 9 month long problem and was trying to get a dr to listen to me. He didn’t get why a dr wouldn’t—as a lot of men don’t—but agreed to the ruse. Once we got to the medical building, he even asked again, “you still want me to go into the exam room with you?” I said yes. I need a dr to do their job.
In the exam room: I explained everything—the dr actually let me explain everything without cutting me off for once—but he was still ready to dismiss it.
Keep in mind-I’m sitting on the exam table, my cousin is sitting in the chair, and the doctor is standing by the door. My cousin hadn’t heard all of it, pain and suffering, symptoms, etc before until I was talking to the doctor, who never looked up from the folder. My cousin looked like he was either going to faint or vomit.
Once I finished talking, and the doctor was dismissing it and about to walk out, my cousin asked “you’re not even going to examine her? After hearing all that?”
The dr said I don’t think “it’s necessary”. My cousin just looked at him and said, ‘Well I do. “
The dr said “everything she described sounds like something very common. I’ll prescribe her something”.
My cousin asked, “how are you going to prescribe her something when you don’t know what’s wrong? You literally haven’t touched her!
There was a pause.
Luckily my cousin doubled down and say “This is the woman I’m going to marry. The last 9 months she has not been herself, in constant pain. You do your job or we’ll wait here for another dr to finish up and get him to do it.” (FYI-my cousin and I grew up together, closer than siblings, so he did know something was definitely off with me for most of the year)
The dr walked out. My cousin went in search of another dr. I heard him coming back down the hallway saying “we’re not paying a bill until someone pays attention to her and actually treats her”
The dr he found actually walked in the room and started examining me…feeling my throat, neck, using his stethoscope. Dr never ordered any tests though. I ended up having to find a doctor in another state who gave a s***t.
The whole experience had a Profound impact on my cousin. When he married his wife, and she started having medical concerns, he went to every appointment with her. He Became Her Advocate.
Image credits: ccminiwarhammer
#16
Lol a doctor asking when my last period was and if I my pain was menstrual cramps. The pain was my upper right side under my ribcage felt like a hernia. This was after talking to three women about my detailed medical history (10 surgeries/procedures) in 3 years including ::drum roll:: a full hysterectomy 2 years prior to this visit that I also gave them record to.
No-Reward8036:
I had a GP ask me when my last period was when I went in for a repeat HRT prescription. I mentioned I had had a hysterectomy 20 years before. 'Yes, I see that,' says he. 'but when was your last period?'
Image credits: Charming_Garbage_161
#17
I was ill for a decade. All I heard is that I was overweight by 20-40lbs, when I lost that weight they said it must be anxiety. I kept trying even though everyone in my life thought it was in my head. Finally my liver enzymes got high enough in some blood work and they discovered a tumor half the size of my liver. They removed it along with a third of my liver. Turns out your liver is hella important! The surgery left me with type 1 diabetes and crazy scars. But I’m still here 9 years later and that in itself is a victory!
Image credits: lenoremontrose
#18
"You're too young to be getting perimenopause symptoms".
Electric-Sheepskin:
Me too!
I was sent to an allergist, a rheumatologist, an orthopedist—suggested all sorts of medications, from anti-inflammatories to antidepressants—for years! And yes, you've guessed it, it was just perimenopause and I needed a little HRT.
Image credits: justmoochingaround
#19
I've had many, but a friend is having an experience that is heartbreaking. She was suffering severe back pain, with the doctor dismissing it and telling her it would get better, that she probably just needed to lose some weight. She came back some time later with even more unbearable pain. They finally do scans this time and find cancerous tumors that have metasticized. The doctors say it's too late, can't help her. She has about a couple of weeks left to live right now.
Image credits: michelemybell123
#20
When I was 47, I saw 4 different male doctors for cardiac symptoms, including a cardiologist who ordered a halter for me to wear and every single one came back with "anxiety" or menopause, or some other dismissive diagnosis. Had a 100% blockage of the LAD artery (the widowmaker), had a massive heart attack, and almost died. Emergency cardiology team after the life flight were stunned that I made it.
KeiylaPolly:
Oh lord! I’ve seen three doctors for my heart, including halter like you, and all came back with “anxiety.” I was having skipped heart beats, fast beating, and twinges of pain. A fourth doctor ran blood tests, found I had high cholesterol, put me on cholesterol medication and completely coincidentally, my anxiety symptoms have disappeared.
Image credits: doocurly
#21
“You can’t have a concussion, your hair is too thick.”
Doctor sent me home when I was pretty sure I was concussed because he felt the incident wasn’t severe enough (hit my head on the cinderblock dorm wall) to concuss me.
Went back two extremely hazy days later and fully failed a neuro exam, sent straight to the ER.
VERY concussed.
elfowlcat:
An urgent care PA told me my son couldn’t have a concussion because he hit his forehead. “You can’t get a concussion there.” Took him to our family doc the next day who when I told him what the PA said, literally said “What the fu…” Yeah. Concussion. Fall onto pavement face-first from 6 feet up and you have a concussion.
Image credits: dharmoniedeux
#22
When i had my first baby i got an infection because my waters had broken 3 days prior and i wasn’t induced for 3 whole days after that. I developed a blood clot (10cm) inside of me and when i would tell the midwives and doctors that i was in pain they kept telling me it was ‘wind’.. WIND?!?.. i insisted that at the age of 26 i know what a fart feels like and this is not it!!.. They passed off a large internal blood clot as wind for 6 whole days until i was admitted in to ITU and operated on again to remove the clot. I ended up in ITU for over 3 weeks with no visitors allowed and not allowed to see my baby who was only a week old when i left and 4 weeks old when i came back home. ☹️.
Image credits: SparkleDust0
#23
I had recurring Bell’s palsy and got sent to a specialist. This is where half of your face is paralyzed and droops, most obviously when smiling. It was still bad without smiling. Like , drool, a sunken and lowered eye (unable to fully close) and only able to talk out of one side of my crooked mouth. Anyway, the doctor couldn’t find a cause, but his advice was just “well, stop smiling”. I am sure he had worse cases but- I just remember that for some reason.
ihavemytowel42:
When I woke up one morning with Bell’s palsy I was terrified. I immediately did the self check to see if I had a stroke. My doctor immediately put me on steroids and antivirals (it can be caused by a reaction to chickenpox).
I’m sorry you had such an incompetent doctor.
Image credits: Potential_House_157
#24
My primary care doctor told me I was probably just “working out too hard” when I described textbook gallstone attacks. I had to piece together what was going on myself and request an urgent appointment with a different doctor about half a year later to get the ultrasound that revealed my gallbladder was full of stones.
Later the same doctor dismissed crushing fatigue as “getting older” (I was in my late twenties) and a weird feeling spot on my breast with “some women just have ropier breasts.” Imagine everyone’s surprise when a few years later I was in treatment for breast cancer!
I have a different primary care doctor now.
Meleathis:
Ugh god that's absolutely awful.
When my gallbladder was full of stones I ended up at the ER because of the pain and after being left alone in a room for many hours with nothing for pain just got told it was anxiety and to go home. Was absolutely livid and had to go back some days later because the pain was worse and someone took it serious and had the whole gallbladder removed soon after.
Image credits: imaginetoday
#25
He listens to me now because I’ve proven that I’m well informed. But I have an autoimmune condition that impacts my thyroid. I could tell when things were off and which way I had swung (hyper vs hypo). The first few appointments he’d suggest that maybe my perception was opposite the situation, but I kept getting it right. Now I basically inform him how I plan to change meds if my labs are off. When we have chronic conditions we so often become the expert.
MC-ClapYoHandzz:
I have hashimotos and it took roughly 5 years and 4 docs to be diagnosed. On the cusp of hypo every blood test but had all the symptoms - fatigue, difficulty losing weight, always cold, MASSIVE freaking goiter and multiple nodules. It'd be considered hypo now a days with updated ranges. Always asked about hashis but was told my labs were "fine". Never any resolution. Why did I have a goiter? "Sometimes that just happens." Okie doke.
A new endo came in and ran a tpo test - the test for hashis. Mine was over 100 when it should be less than 35. Never been tested in all those years, even when I specifically asked about it. By this point the goiter was large enough, my entire thyroid had to be surgically removed. Absolutely no reason it should've taken 5 years to run a single blood test.
Image credits: teacherttc
#26
Not quite on topic but related: When I was younger, my body was resistant to local anesthesia and required double the normal dose for the same effect. I was facing serious cervical cancer issues at the time, and my male doc thought I was lying about my resistance or he didn't want to dish out $ for it. He performed a LEEP biopsy on my cervix -- which uses electricity to slice a piece off! I could feel everything and arched my back and screamed from the pain. The nurse had to use alcohol wipes under my nose to keep me from fainting. Afterwards, he called me a baby.
#27
Not me but my daughter. The doctor dismissed my concerns for the lump on her throat. Her thyroid looked big. They were like, oh it looks fine we’re not concerned. I asked them to run some test and they finally did. They call a few days later and said to get her into the endocrinologist asap her TSH level was 126. It’s suppose to be around .4-4.0 (give or take) she her level was 126!!! WTH?!? It was a freaking goiter. She has Hashimotos. 😳 I’m so glad I stood on business. She’s doing fine now but will be in thyroid meds.🩷.
#28
The summer I was 11 we were supposed to go to Disney as a family trip. I was super sick the day we left and throwing up with diarrhea. We left anyway and I passed out when we hit Florida. Stopped at the hospital in Jacksonville and they told my mom I was just dramatic and emotional becoming a teenager going through puberty. I couldn’t walk at Disney. Came home the next week went to my normal doctor, said it was a stomach bug. The next week I had lost 24 pounds and they did an ultrasound and told my mom I had cancer. Emergency surgery, I died twice, it was a ruptured and abscessed appendix. Didn’t stitch it right, used staples, busted open twice and was infected, and now I have a scar the size of a banana fused to my intestines and an ovary. Also have PCOS and let me tell you I know every time it comes from the right side when I have my period.
#29
If psychiatrists count, my ADHD was dismissed as depression to the point I did develop depression because of how badly I was failing school. My ADHD is severe and it was to a point I could hardly do addition anymore because my mind genuinely wouldn't stay still. I was exhausted constantly, I tried to end my life over it. They put me on bipolar medication that caused me to have tics for about a week until I stopped taking them. Finally, I was tested and put on proper medication. I'm now in a special needs school and top of my class. And math is my best subject. I just wish they didn't keep dismissing me because "several teenage girls have depression, it's probably what you have too." I was at a 2nd-grade reading level in sixth grade. Years of my life wasted thinking I was just stupid and beyond repair because they refuse to believe anybody besides 7 year old boys can have ADHD.
Image credits: dandicusdanciferfan
#30
A primary care old golfing geezer doctor left me sit in the exam room for over 20 minutes (he was already over an hour late). I had the fun of listening to him on the phone with a golfing buddy planing their next golf trip. When he finally came in to the exam room he looked at my chart and asked me why my husband and I didn’t have kids. I told him we didn’t want to and said I wanted to get my tubes tied or hubby would be getting a vasectomy. He said “Well you’ll have to have your husband’s permission to do that. I was in my mid thirties, hubby early 40’s.
#31
Not me, but my mother in law. She was having back surgery and didn’t really know how to explain things or what to expect. I went with her to her appointment. First, we waited 2 hours for her doctor. He was a jerk. Very full of himself. He tried to rush us, but I had questions. He was so mad and red by the time he was done, I told him waiting two hours to see him didn’t mean we were gonna be cut short.
#32
I was told my severe cramps and vomiting from IBS and lactose intolerance was anxiety about going away to Uni.
#33
My wife has dealt with chronic pain and fatigue for nearly a decade. Doctors just write her off and don't really try tu help. She's been to every specialist in the tri-state area.
About 2 years ago, I finally started going with her. She said the attention she receives when I'm with her is like night and day. They haven't solved the issues but they take her seriously when I'm just in the room.
The doctors instinctively look at and talk to me. And I just tell them 'she's the patient. Not me. Talk to her".
#34
I have back problems, have since I was a child. Once I was an adult and not seeing my pediatric orthopedic doc, I didn't find a new one for years. Finally asked for a referral because my back pain had become significant after several years as a hairstylist.
Went to the doc, told him my history and present levels of pain and how it's become significantly worse with my career and making it difficult to perform certain tasks on the job. Literally leaving work and crying on my way home from the pain, etc. His response? "Well it's not like that job is construction work. I don't really see how doing hair can cause back issues".
Not only did he dismiss my pain, he managed to also take a dig at female-dominated trade jobs. .
Image credits: ButterscotchMoney529
#35
I had appendicitis and the doctor told me I was having ovulation pain. A few days later my appendix burst and I had peritonitis. He could have easily sent me for an ultrasound and checked it out and I would have been able to have the easy laparoscopic appendectomy. Instead I had to stay in the hospital over a week I was sick as f**k and I had a draining wound. Soool thanks for taking my complaint seriously doc I could have died.
Image credits: Busy_Sandwich1842
#36
Took me so much time, tears, and money to properly treat an ear infection. If I were to get a dollar for every time a doctor asked, "Did yOu Go sWimmIng?!" I could buy a house!!
#37
Starting at age 15 I had abdominal pain that was dismissed as everything from an STD (even though I was not sexually active when it started) to gas to it just “being in my head”.
What I was 26 I finally got an answer. I had a huge cyst and several small ones on my ovaries.
I probably wasn’t the best at describing my symptoms but they certainly didn’t do anything to try to give me an answer.
mistegirl:
I was mid 30s and horribly overweight when I started getting bad stabbing pains in my abdominal area. I hated doctors so ignored it for months.
Then one night it got so bad the pain was causing me to throw up so violently that I burst all the blood vessels in my face and eyes. I went to the ER in my rural area at like midnight on a Saturday.
I'm not a pain meds person, but it took trying stronger doses of 4 different ones before something got me so high I just didn't care about the pain anymore.
They did a general scan and the doctor came back with you have a cyst on your ovary, go see your obgyn on Monday. See, the little hospital didn't have any obgyn staff overnights and didn't feel like calling anyone in.
I was crying next to the bed trying to get dressed when this older battle worn nurse came in and saw me and told me to lay the hell back down, they were calling people in.
An hour later I had an internal sonogram that found a grapefruit size cyst had fully torsion my right ovary and it was literally dead and rotting in my body. Ambulance ride to a real hospital and emergency surgery and I was good to go within 48 hours.
I would have been dead before I could have gotten into my doc on Monday if it weren't for that nurse.
Image credits: Brite_Butterfly
#38
When I was 18, I was still seeing my family doctor from childhood. He wasn't a great doctor, but I didn't know where else to go. I had a UTI and I went in to get treatment. I told him I was also experiencing recurring feminine itch issues, and my period had stopped completely for several months.
He gave me the usual "this is your own fault" nonsense and told me I obviously didn't know how to wipe myself - so this man, whom I'd been seeing since I was 3 years old, gave me a lecture on how a woman should wipe herself. When I told him I knew how to do it and that this was caused by something else, he rolled his eyes at me and said, "You can't just admit when you're wrong, can you?" He completely ignored the fact that I hadn't had a period in months and said, 'You're 15lbs overweight. When women are overweight, their periods stop."
He wanted to do a full pelvic exam, and I declined. I said I would rather have it done by a female OBGYN, but because of my insurance, I had to get a referral from my GP. He refused and said that he wasn't going to send me to an OBGYN because they aren't necessary unless you have "real issues." Again, saying that I just needed to learn how to wipe myself properly and lose 15lbs.
I ended up going to an OBGYN and paying out of pocket. I found out I had a hormone imbalance that was causing some serious issues for me.
Image credits: will_write_for_tacos
#39
In my early 20s I’d had a cough / sore throat for about 6 weeks straight, I went to the doctor and was explaining my symptoms. He interrupted me mid sentence and said “Your throat is sore because you talk so much, you’ve been here 2 minutes and you’ve already talked SO much. If you stop talking you’ll get better.”
I kept suffering for another 3 weeks before I went to a different doctor, they gave me antibiotics and I was feeling better within a few days.
Image credits: toffeemuffins
#40
I had severe back pain (45F) . I went to a newly built hospital that was part of a larger chain of hospital to an orthopedic specialist. They took X-rays and said they saw nothing. I was then sent physical therapy which was impossible to do because of pain. Basically laid on a bed with hot blankets on me. I then returned to the specialist where they took more x-rays. They said nothing is wrong with me. Take OTC pain medicine. I was not impressed with the doctor, in fact I am not sure I even saw a real orthopedic, he would hop up on the counter and swing his legs as he spoke to me with a kid like attitude. I came back 3 months later because my back was getting worse and my knee had started hurting. I was told the real doctor didn’t see a need to get a MRI done but would refer me to a knee specialist. At this point I was at a loss because I just couldn’t believe they would think I was making this horrible pain up.
I went to the knee doctor who was part of a different orthopedic practice. I ended up having knee surgery. I told him about the immense pain in my back. He referred me to another orthopedic in his practice. Go in to the new doctor. He does an exam and X-ray . He asks why the other place didn’t do an MRI. I told him they said they didn’t think I needed it. He orders an MRI. He calls me within days of the MRI results to come in. I’ll stop here to mention that it had been over a year since I started seeing the first doctor at the other practice. I go in to the new doctor, he pulls up the MRI, you have a cyst growing in your vertebrae that is pushing on your spinal cord. We can schedule surgery right away. I cried! After over a year of excruciating pain it could be fixed. What pisses me off is if the original doctor would have done there job I wouldn’t have had to deal with it for so long. Still makes me mad. Had surgery and 3 after that because I had another one in a different place. 10 years later and I am doing well and have minimal pain most days. I’m glad there is a happy ending.
#41
This was with a woman doctor and I went in with gastrointestinal issues because I was just so fed up with being sick all the time and she was supposed to have done research in different diets from a medical perspective and was going to advise if she thought that was my problem.
She was in the room for 15 seconds and let me know that my issue was not "life-threatening", only "quality of life threatening" and didn't understand what I wanted her to do and walked out.
I went to the cashier and refused to provide my insurance information (they took me back before I was done with the forms) as I would not be paying.
Another one: I told a male hospitalist and orthopedist that I was having neck pain and wanted to know why. He told me he wouldn't give me d***s and wouldn't listen when I told him I didn't want d***s- I wanted some scans done to see what the problem was.
He said something about girls that I don't remember anymore but I was like "ok it's because I'm a young female" and sent me away. I immediately responded to the the text I got asking for a review of my visit. Told it that I felt disrespected bc of my age and gender and he needed some training on working with female patients.
I got a call back to reschedule and this time there was a woman in the room. He scheduled me for X rays and an MRI. 2 disc fusions and a year of physical therapy later, I'm finally starting to manage my neck pain.
#42
I had a kidney infection. I had flank pain on one side and severe fatigue.
Doctor saw me with my head down and looking run down, ignored me talking about my flank pain and severe fatigue, and began trying to insist that my issue was depression. I pushed back and had to continue pushing back that my symptoms were not caused by depression. He was resistant to getting me a d******k to assess for a UTI.
He finally gave in and, lo and behold, I had a gnarly kidney infection. My mom was with me, and he kept trying to justify why he thought it was just depression. "Well, her head was low and she just looked unhappy, and...".
#43
I went to the E.R. presenting with excruciating head pain. A scan revealed "bruising" along my skull. I hadn't hit my head, and the pain was sudden onset. The doctor was convinced my husband hit me and refused to look further into or even hear that my husband has NEVER laid a hand on me.
6 years later, I have surgery to remove the mass inside my head. Which is exactly what the first doctor was seeing. The artery supplying said mass had long since lost the ability to drain, and I was months (if not less) away from a catastrophic bleed.
Years of symptoms, worsening pain, almost losing my vision, and losing all of my hair. All because assuming my husband hits me is easier than following up on odd imagining and labs.
I'm recovering well, and my husband still has never laid a hand on me.
#44
I have an autoimmune condition. The first symptom I had was exhaustion. Total body, tired to the bone exhaustion. I would come home from work, sit down in a recliner at 5 pm, and fall asleep there until 5 am. I went to the Dr to try to figure it out. He told me I was too skinny for it to be thyroid related even though I had a history of thyroid problems. He told me I was probably diabetic. All that testing came back negative. Then he said it was probably depression because " Women can be depressed for no reason without even knowing it." He gave me a psych referral. I tried to explain to him that, at 24, I had already buried both my parents. I knew the difference between not wanting to get out of bead and not being able to get out of bed. I went to the psych appt anyway. After an hours long evaluation, that man told me that I didn't show any classic symptoms of depression, but he was going to prescribed me antidepressants to see if they would make me feel better. I told him that he could write whatever script he wanted, but I wasn't taking meds for something he didn't think I had. A year later, when the pain, swelling, and rashes showed up, I was diagnosed by another doc with rheumatoid arthritis and a type of mild lupus.
#45
In Feb 2020 I went to my dentist and told him I thought I had an abscess. Symptoms checked out but he said it was just pain from grinding my teeth in my sleep, and tried to get me to purchase a mouth guard for £300. I didn't have that kind of money to spare so I declined.
In June 2020 I went back. Same pain and symptoms but more extreme. Can't sleep, can't eat, can hardly open my mouth, no painkillers work. He told me again that it was not an abscess, that it was from grinding my teeth, and I should have bought the night guard when he told me to.
4 days later I took myself to A&E (the ER for Americans), and they immediately sent me to another hospital that had a maxillofacial department because they were 99% sure just from looking at me that it was, in fact, a dental abscess. X-rays proved that it was so I don't know how my dentist didn't see it on the x-rays he took 4 days earlier.
I ended up having surgery the next day, after awake nasal intubation which makes you feel like you're suffocating. It was so severe that the surgeons had to cut my neck to access all the gunk and now I have a very visible scar there. Thanks dentist!
#46
"it's just an ear infection, are you just trying to get a drs note?" meanwhile my undiagnosed lupus was causing kidney failure, pericarditis and reoccurring pneumonia. thank GOD after the 4th visit for pnuemonia i got a different dr who actually helped.
#47
When I was about 12 I suddenly came down with a horrible stomach virus which caused me to have major food aversions. Whenever I would try to eat I would gag, so as a result I lost a huge amount of weight. My mom took me to a physician and he dismissed it as me purposely starving myself for attention and advised her to force me to drink weight gain shakes. I lost a lot of trust for doctors from then on.
My grandma pulled through and helped me ease my way back into eating solids and regaining a healthy weight. Love that woman forever.
#48
Had abdominal pain and discomfort for months, but was also going to the same doctor for some mental health struggles that I’ve had my entire life. Take my meds daily and everything else felt good mentally, but the stomach pain was “due to anxiety.”
Took an urgent care trip when I collapsed at work due to the pain to find out I had a giant ol cyst on my ovary that had popped.
I hate doctors 😌.
#49
I had pain in my lower back and thighs for years, starting when I was 21. Sometimes it was dull pain, sometimes I would be screaming and writhing on the floor. Multiple doctors over the years dismissed me, saying it was: because of my period, because I was fat, anxiety causing muscle spasms, perfectionism (?), hormonal, being a woman, in my head, etc., etc. They gave me ibuprofen or naproxen and physical therapy (which did nothing) and sent me on my way. I finally talked my way into seeing a rheumatologist and in one appointment he did a simple physical exam and an x-ray, and diagnosed me with arthritis in my SI joint. I started on a medication and my pain disappeared. I had been suffering - tortured - for 10 years and all it took was ONE doctor to take me seriously and do a basic test!
#50
Male gyno scolded for jumping back as if I was in pain because, according to him, I was feeling pressure, not pain. Never would have thought the sensation of burning knives on my genitals counted as "pressure," but sure, dude. Did not go back.
#51
I had severe endometriosis and my periods were unbearable. My doc put me through procedure after procedure and wouldn’t consent to a hysterectomy. When he finally did, reluctantly, the hysterectomy took many hours more than expected. When I woke up in the recovery room he was holding my hand and said to me “I’m so sorry”. Turns out it was the worst case he’d ever seen.
#52
1996: When I showed up for a mammogram due to a lump, the woman said, "We don't do mammos on 30 year olds." I had to tell her my doctor ordered it and I'm going to get it.
2019: female gyn NP (young) shrugged her shoulders at my 14 day periods where I had to where adult diapers during the first week. (btw I hate that offices make you speak to three different people before you can speak to your doctor).
#53
Pain in groin/pelvic area post marathon. Provider said I probably just strained a muscle and should stretch more. (I stretch a ton, and I'm in great physical shape). I also stated that the pain had started right before the marathon but got much worse around mile 8; and he said it couldn't be too serious of an injury since I finished the marathon. He didn't want to do imaging. Went to a different Dr. a few weeks later and found I had a complete pelvic fracture. No wonder it hurt to walk. This wasn't life threatening luckily. Just painful and got in my way to return to running - and my next marathon.
#54
I have a very, very high pain tolerance. I went from “maybe cramps?” level pain to “not able to stand without crying” in about three hours. The young male ER doctor asked if I was *sure* it wasn’t my period. If I could’ve, I would’ve launched myself at him.
#55
Had significant anemia and doctor kept saying ‘oh just take an iron pill daily’. It slowly got worse and worse over 10 years despite advocating for myself repeatedly, and doctors saying I was ‘fine, stop worrying’. Other than the anemia, I had no other symptoms or health problems. Fast forward and I switch health plans and therefore get a new doctor. She runs tests and was like ‘whoa you’re so anemic you almost need a blood transfusion, what is going on? And why do you have a copper IUD as those make bleeding heavier! You need that out immediately.’ IUD got removed, and in that process they had trouble removing it because the strings broke off, so they did an ultrasound. Ultrasound showed a ‘small’ fibroid. So the IUD finally gets removed, bleeding notably better but still heavy. A year later I have fibroid removed too to see if it helps. That f’ing fibroid was so large it took them 45 minutes to cut it out of my uterus! And just like that, anemia resolved itself over 6 months. My friends… I was bleeding more each month than my body could replenish and was slowly bleeding out over time! So yeah it took TEN YEARS for this to get solved. And now I am back to my normal self. Ten years of increasing fatigue, brain fog, etc until I was unable to exercise or hike, or do things I loved. And with two simple procedures, the positive difference is wild!
#56
After my fourth child, I had sharp shooting pains in the region of my stomach. It felt exactly like when I had had a uterine infection after the birth of my second child. My OB told me to go to my GP whose office was closer.
I was told “sometimes things hurt when you have a baby.”
I walked around like that for six weeks until my husband found my curled in the fetal position on the bathroom floor and took me to the ER. Bladder infection.
#57
I had just been hit by a car and could barely walk but was forced to take a pregnancy test, despite that it was nearly impossible that I was pregnant and would not have kept the pregnancy even if I somehow had been.
