Breaking 90 in golf is hard. There is a reason so many amateurs fail to get over the line, but I am not prepared to lay down and accept that fate just yet.
There are data-proven ways to break 90, as well as certain shots that high-handicappers need, but so much of overcoming this hurdle is psychological. The fact is, I need to do a bit of work on improving my mental resilience.
So, in a sort of therapeutic way, I decided to share with you 5 things you can only relate to if you've never broken 90 - in the hope that it builds community, creates a feeling of acceptance and relights the fire for my on-going pursuit...
5 Things You Can Only Relate To If You've Never Broken 90
This list of observations, experiences and general frustrations are things I have picked up on my own journey to breaking 90, which I still haven't yet completed, but if you have some of your own that I have missed - drop them in the comments box below.
Writing this certainly made me feel better about my lacklustre performances on the course, but there is always room for a few more relatable reasons that evidence how the golfing gods are punishing me for something.
1. 'Jeckyll And Hyde' Phenomenon
In my pursuit of a sub-90 score, one of the biggest frustrations I have encountered is a 'Jekyll and Hyde' phenomenon that plagues my scoring.
If you look at my front-nine and back-nine score from any particular round, you could be excused for thinking that two different people have teed it up over the course of the full 18 holes.
One guy is a decent golfer who makes a few pars and goes round in 43, while the other is a chopper who, it appears, has never picked up a golf club in his life and hacks his way to a 52.
I'm either left frustrated that I didn't shoot better on the front after a recovery on the back, or I am dejectedly sipping my pint in the clubhouse after I threw away a golden opportunity to reach the milestone down the stretch.
The most irritating part is I have no idea when either will make an appearance, but both seem pretty content to collaborate in causing me pain and misery on the golf course.
2. Turning Into Archimedes Himself
Four holes to go. Closing stretch officially entered.
All of a sudden, I turn into Archimedes himself as I make an intellectual breakthrough in working out exactly what I still need to do in order to break 90.
Combinations flash in front of my very eyes as I process the different scoring variations that lead to the magical land of scoring in the 80s.
A score of 47 on the front and a score of 26 on the first five holes of the back-nine means I have 16 shots to play with.
Three gross pars and a nett par should do the trick, but if I could turn that nett par into a nett birdie I can then afford to make a nett par instead of one of the gross pars.
You catch my drift. A flash of light and I'm back in the room, but now I have forgotten how to swing a golf club. At least the maths was right.
3. The Blow-Up Hole
Clearly, golfers of any ability can have a blow-up hole - but I would wager that few do it quite as spectacularly as me (or other high-handicap golfers).
Recently, I was on my way towards my best ever front-nine. A series of gross pars and bogeys meant I needed a bogey down the par-4 9th to score 43 and give myself a great chance of breaking 90 for the first time ever.
Anyone who has played golf at Sand Moor Golf Club will attest to the fact that the 9th tee box is the most stunning location on the course, with views of the reservoir and dramatic 16th fairway, but sadly - it's also flanked by white stakes.
"I know, I'll play it safe and get the halfway hut with a great chance on the back-nine", I thought.
"Iron for safety, Baz. Anywhere down the left".
Cue shank of said 'safety' club straight out of bounds. Re-tee, still seething about my incompetence, and proceed to do exactly the same thing. Fantastic.
So, that five I needed now required me to hole out from the tee - on a 350-yard+ par 4. If I told you I made a nine, I would be protecting myself and my ego. So, read into that what you will.
4. Range Confidence
I am a flusher on the range. There, I said it!
I know many people think the same, but if you watched me off that lovely flat mat with a 70-yard wide range in front of me, you'd think I was a single-figure golfer (probably).
Get me onto the course, however, and things take a turn for the worse. Suddenly, I look like a chopper desperately trying to piece together a decent score.
Now, before you point out the psychology of hitting on the range vs the course and point out that there are a number of perfectly logical reasons as to why this happens - I know all of that already.
I'm just saying... it's annoying.
5. Not Losing A Ball Celebrations
Trying to break 90 has been a long and arduous journey, which has yet shown no sign of ending - apart from when I shot 86 with an asterisk on a non-counting course.
So, in the interest of maintaining a degree of sanity, you have to celebrate the small wins.
One such victory is playing a whole round without losing a golf ball. For many 'good' golfers, this might seem a little pathetic.
Well, I made enough deposits into the water, trees and long rough of a variety of courses over the years to be considered a major shareholder in second-hand golf ball businesses - so I am taking the W.
Let's face it, the life expectancy of the treasured full round golf ball is limited anyway. I'll be playing again in a few days time.
