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Bored Panda
Bored Panda
Monika Pašukonytė

28 Questions Adults Like Asking Kids Despite Them Being Inappropriate, As Shared Online

When I was a preschooler, the top 2 questions that various adults asked me were always “What do you want to become when you grow up?” (well, yes, a 3 Y.O. kid makes some Napoleonic plans...) and “Who do you love more, dad or mom?” (great, then why not ask which lung is more comfortable for me to breathe with?)

Decades have passed - and we, adults, still continue to ask children, our own and others', questions of varying degrees of stupidity and inappropriateness, without even realizing that we're unwittingly traumatizing them. So here are almost three dozen similar stories, collected by Bored Panda from this viral thread in the AskReddit community.

More info: Reddit


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In fact, the tradition of asking children stupid questions goes back as far as the tradition of lisping and deliberately imitating toddlers' babbling. Well, then somehow it wasn't customary to pay as much attention to mental health as it is today, so a whole set of meaningless and allegedly 'cute' questions was formed that, like myths and legends, are passed down from generation to generation. Up until today, for sure.


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On the other hand, it seems that we adults sometimes simply don’t have the slightest idea what to talk about with children - especially if we are not their parents, and this is a kind of small talk. True, unlike any small talk between adults, our questions do sometimes look at least strange. To understand this, it’s enough to do one simple thing - just put yourself in the kid’s place and imagine exactly how you will answer this or that question. If you find it difficult to answer, it’s better to avoid asking.


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A separate category of questions comes from adults who are only superficially familiar with, for example, teens, about their emotions, physical health, or imposing their own opinions. Yes, you are an adult, you most likely have more life experience behind you - but this in no way gives you (and me too of course) any right to make value judgments and put it in the form of these 'innocent' questions. Just think back to your teenage years - and I’m almost sure that a couple of similar stories will pop up in your mind.


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Be that as it may, I'm also absolutely sure that the tradition of asking children weird inappropriate questions will outlive us, and for a long time, and the only thing we can do to make kids more comfortable communicating with us is to simply think about whether it’s worth asking this or that question at all? And, of course, re-read the stories listed here again - perhaps this list will really benefit us.


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Asking if another child of the opposite sex is their boyfriend/girlfriend.“Why are you playing with [gender specific toy]? That’s for boys/girls.”Asking a teenage girl if she's on her period any time she shows any emotion “why can’t you be more like your brother/sister?”"Do you want to burn in/go to Hell?"Asking a question and rejecting any answer the kid gives unless it's the adults own opinion."Why wont you give me a hug?" At a family event where everyone is staring.i’m a young teenage girl, and both my step dad and his dad tell me all the time “can I marry you?” “If you don’t find a man soon I guess I’ll have to be the man!” “Have you found a boy yet?” followed up by “If not i’m single!” the worse one was my step dad: “If your mom ever divorces me then can you marry me?” I don’t know why they say that all the time but God is it annoying.Asked by "family" most of the time: Do you really want to eat that (much)? Do you want to make me sad?When I got my period and they would ask “Don’t you feel like a woman?” or some c**p like that. I was 11 and not amusedI had pretty severe eczema as a child. Refused to wear anything but long sleeves and pants even during hot, humid New England summers because every single time I left the house, at least one grown a*s person would ask, “what’s wrong with your skin?” My mother spent a lot of time correcting grown ups on their behavior. When she got tired of it, she let me do it myself.“Why don’t you smile more?”"Can I go to the bathroom please?" "I don't know, can you?"What are you going to be when you grow up? I’m 67, and I still don’t know ?‍♀️"Do you still believe in Santa?" All you're doing is making them question Santa.When I had my second baby, heaps of people asked my eldest (2) "Do you like your new baby brother?"  Apart from everything else, it's irrelevant. Like, we're definitely keeping this baby either way..Do you have a boyfriend?I saw a reporter ask a 13 year old if he wanted to go to the olympics. He straight up told her that the junior nationals and junior worlds were more realistic goals right now. What a solid head that kid has."Are you a boy or a girl?" leave them the f**k aloneanything that relates to the kid having a child when they grow up. had this from my family growing up and it’s probably not a huge thing but asking a young girl if she’s going to have babies when she grows up is so (for lack of a better word) jarring. has made me want to practice abstinence ?Will you take care of us when we get old“Can you keep a secret?” Doesn’t matter what the secret is, that’s so confusing and puts a ton of pressure on the kidParents that have broken up and use the child as a middleman to pass messages and get sneak peek into what’s going on in their ex life. I define children as those who are under 12 years old.If there's family dysfunction & a kid is going through a rough emotional period with moments of lashing out: "Do you really want to be like your mom/dad when you're older?"Do you love your mother or father?Hi kids, do you like violence?On the rocks or neat?Do you like movies about gladiators?
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