This Sunday is Food Monthly Sunday in the Observer.
Sound of stomachs gurgling excitedly in anticipation.
It wouldn't be right to make blog readers wait until then. So here for your delectation, an hors d'oeuvre. 21 things every self-respecting foodie really must do, as recommended by some of the foodiest people on earth. In no particular order. There are another 29 in the mag itself.
1 Make toast Not just any old piece of toast, but that which has been cut thick from a fresh, old-fashioned white loaf. It should be toasted over the hot plate of an Aga, till the cut sides reach only the palest gold, and the crusts have blackened very slightly round the edges. It should be spread with salted (yes, salted) Welsh butter and eaten before some of the butter has had the chance to completely melt.
2 Eat the best Simon Rogan, chef-patron of Michelin starred L'Enclume, and several others of those in the know suggest the full symphonie menu at La Ferme de Mon Père – Marc Veyrat's restaurant in Megève. The owner was awarded three Michelin stars for this faithful reconstruction of a Savoyard farmhouse in the mountains of the Haute Savoie. Purpose-built to his own design, the building is a homage to his peasant-farmer father and his own roots, where every night the animals would be brought into the stables under the house. And indeed at La Ferme, where authentic farmyard smells permeate the eating area, diners can look down through the glass panes in the floor onto the flock of mountain sheep, a carthorse and a flock of hens. I would agree with them all, except that I have never been comfortable with being introduced to an animal before I sit down and eat it. La Ferme de Mon Père, Megève, France (00 33 4 50 21 01 01), 16 courses for approx £238
3 Dismember a chicken Nigella Lawson says that everyone should do this at least once in their lives. It is actually quite easy when you get the hang of it, and your supper will taste much better for your having had a hand in it, so to speak.
4 Eat lunch at Le Grand Véfour Housed in a corner of the delicate stone arcade that frames Paris's Jardin du Palais Royale, just up from the Comedie-Française, Le Grande Véfour is literally the mother and father of all restaurants. Véfour, once a chef to the French royal household, founded the establishment that bears his name back in the 1780s. Here you will eat Guy Martin's melt-in-the-mouth raviolis de foie gras, an emulsion de crème truffé from Limoges china and pore over one of the world's most revered wine lists. At least that is what I am told by very informed foodies. A word of warning: wear your dark glasses or risk being blinded by the OTT decor and swirly carpets. Le Grand Véfour, 17 Rue de Beaujolais, Paris (00 33 1 42 96 56 27) approx €200 a head
5 Boil a new-laid egg Our own Hugh Fearnley-Whittingstall suggests a freshly laid egg from a self-raised hen, boiled for 4* minutes and served with well-buttered granary toast soldiers. Allergic to eggs myself, I will just have to take his word for it. You can have the egg Hugh, I'll have the soldiers.
6 Dine at the French Laundry First you must devote yourself to -getting through to reservations at this Californian shrine – put the phone on redial and speakerphone and be prepared to sit there for an hour or more. Then God help you if you actually want a reservation on a specific day at a specific time. The place itself is delightful, situated in a small house that was once a French laundry (the only reminder now is an old-fashioned wooden clothes peg attached to each stiff white linen napkin). The restaurant has a charming, lush garden – perfect for pre-dinner drinks, and the kitchen is visible through huge windows so you can watch the chefs praying over their minuscule towering creations. The French Laundry, 6640 Washington Street, Yountville, California (00 1 707 944 2380)
7 Take a dip More precisely, dip into the warm cheese fondue at Watergate Bay's Beach Hut in Cornwall after a morning's surfing. Converted from a bucket and spade shop, the Beach Hut manages to combine a slightly chaotic informality with fantastic food. The wooden walls, wicker chairs, -primary colours and reggae background music create a colourful beach-shack -ambience, while the views are of endless sand and sea. The Beach Hut, Watergate Bay, nr Tregurrian, Cornwall (01637 860877)
8 Dive for sea urchins Fino's Sam Hart would be happy to end his days diving for sea urchins then eating them raw with a slice of lemon on the beach. Certainly there are worse ways to go. If I were a better swimmer I would join him, but I'm happy to make do with the octopus platter at his London restaurant. Fino, 33 Charlotte Street, London (020 7813 8010)
9 Pick your own Our forests and meadows are a valuable, yet under-exploited food source. From late spring till the first frosts, you will find everything from chanterelles to puffballs just waiting to be picked. For the best breakfast of all, head to the woods with your camping stove and fry yourself a fine plate of freshly gathered mushrooms, cooked briefly in a little butter and eaten straight from the pan. Just make certain that you know what you are picking.
10 Eat fish on the Pampelonne Club 55 is St-Tropez's most infamous beach hangout, put on the map in the 1950s by Brigitte Bardot, and now loved by celebs like Bono (cover photograph). Eating the restaurant's overpriced grilled fish while wearing -nothing more than a thong is now a rite of passage for any aspiring model, actress or porn star. If you can't get a table, try Le Voile Rouge (photographed above) up the beach. Of course the food is irrelevant, but who cares? Club 55, Pampelonne Beach, St-Tropez (00 33 4 94 55 55 55)
11 Make love in a vineyard Don't all rush at once, but making love in a vineyard is at the top of Tim Atkin's list. Not just any vineyard either, not even any French vineyard, but in no fewer than all five of the Bordeaux first growth vineyards. 'At night,' The Observer's wine editor adds somewhat coyly. I guess it beats the ladies' loo in All Bar One. Château Lafite-Rothschild, Chateau Latour, and Château Mouton-Rothschild all in Pauillac, Médoc, Château Margaux, in Margaux, Médoc and Château Haut-Brion, in Pessac-Cedex, Graves
12 Slurp udon noodles in Takamatsu Takamatsu, in the prefecture of Kagawa, on the island of Shikoku, to the south of Japan is to noodle lovers what Mecca is to Muslims. According to Terry Durack, restaurant critic and author of Hunger, in this one little town, 300 noodle restaurants all serve up bowls of big thick white, gloopy udon noodles. He suggests you look for hand-kneaded udon, and tells us not to worry about making a noise as we eat. You're supposed to slurp.
13 Learn how to make a dry martini Mr Durack says the perfect ratio is six parts gin to one part vermouth. He's right of course. He says that you pour the gin and vermouth over ice in a chilled shaker, then mix and strain quickly into a chilled martini glass. There are more rules too: any more vermouth and it's a mixed drink. Any less and it's a shot. Anything more than a green olive or a twist of lemon and it's a salad.
14 Nibble cheese-flavoured chocolates Pascal Aussignac from Club Gascon and Le Cercle raves over the cheese-flavoured chocolates created by Jean-Paul Hévin in Paris. Combinations such as chocolate, walnut and Roquefort or epoisses, (that's the stinky one) chocolate and cumin may sound bizarre but the salt/sweet mix of flavours is to die for. Intrepid eater I may be, but I think I'm going to take Pascal's word for it on this one. Camembert and Terry's chocolate orange anyone? JP Hévin, 23 Bis, Avenue de la Motte-Picquet (00 33 1 45 51 99 64)
15 Tread grapes in a laga Tim Atkins gets his kit off again, but this time to tread grapes in a laga in Portugal's upper Douro. He insists you should have consumed a bottle of vintage port before you start.
16 Buy a turbot Peter Weeden of the Paternoster Chop House suggests a trip to Charlestown harbour in St Austell Bay, Cornwall, to catch the day boats just coming in. He wants us to buy a whole, fresh turbot and take it home to cook. Personally I can't think of anything nicer, especially if someone makes a little jug of hollandaise sauce to go with it.
17 Lick an ice cream in Sicily So overrun are we by the choc-chip-fudge-crunch-style American ice creams that it is easy to forget what the real stuff taste like. The ices at Corrado Costanzo in Noto, Sicily, are arguably the best you can find anywhere in the world. Mandarin, made with Sicilian oranges, is probably the most in-demand flavour at this ice-cream and pastry shop but try also mulberry and the jasmin -sorbet that's made with flowers picked in the evening when they are at their most fragrant. Chunky Monkey eat your heart out. Corrado Costanzo, Via Spaventa 7, Noto, Sicily (00 39 931 835 243)
18 Shuck an oyster Any excuse to slurp a decent oyster, but Racine's Henry Harris, who has shucked a few in his time, recommends a platter of 'wild native oysters, from a forgotten oyster bed'. He is right, of course, and I come across so many people who say they don't like these delectably slithery, sexy little creatures but, when pressed, have to admit to never having tried one. Yet why do so many of us rank them as one of the all-time greatest food on earth? Do I have to get down on my knees and beg?
19 Order a Bellini in Harry's Bar It is tempting to think that ordering a Bellini at Harry's Bar is the Venetian equivalent of buying a kiss-me-quick hat in Blackpool. It isn't. Everything about Harry's Bar is spot-on, from the napery to the carpaccio. Pity about the prices. Harry's Bar, Calle Vallaresso, Venice (00 39 41 52 85 777) €14 for a Bellini
20 Wolf down a hotdog on Coney Island Martha Greene, the brains behind London's foodie haven Villandry, has high praise for the hot dogs on New York's Coney Island. But not just any old dog. She claims it must be from Nathan's and you must eat it on the pier. And you don't argue with Martha.
21 Poach a snail Morgan Meunier of London restaurant Morgan M raves over a particular snail dish served at Lameloise in Burgundy. The chef first poaches the snail to remove its rubbery consistency and then serves it in a sauce made from local wine breaking from the tradition of serving it with garlic. So much for me thinking they taste like bogies in garlic butter then. Lameloise, 36 Place d'Armes, Chagny, France (00 33 3 85 87 65 65)
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