Ever feel like the law sometimes belongs in a museum right next to the dinosaur bones and rotary phones? You’re not wrong. Across the U.S., some laws have managed to outlive their purpose by several decades — yet somehow, they’re still technically enforceable today. They might have made sense back when people traveled by horse or thought the telegraph was “too fast,” but in 2025, they’re more laughable than logical.
Buckle up — because we’re about to stroll through ten outdated U.S. laws that are not only bizarre but, in some cases, still enforced.
1. In Alabama, It’s Illegal to Wear a Fake Mustache in Church
Yes, really. In Alabama, it’s still against the law to wear a fake mustache in church if it causes laughter. This relic of the early 20th century was meant to keep worship services solemn — but imagine explaining that to someone wearing a stick-on stache for a themed Sunday fundraiser. While it’s rarely enforced today, the law technically remains on the books. Somewhere in Alabama, a Sunday school teacher might still be keeping an eye out for facial hair fraudsters.
2. In Arizona, Cutting Down a Cactus Can Land You in Jail
In Arizona, cacti are sacred — legally speaking. The state enforces strict penalties for chopping down a saguaro cactus, with fines and even potential jail time for offenders. Originally designed to protect the desert ecosystem, the law remains in full force today. The irony? In some cases, homeowners have been fined for trimming cacti that were dangerously leaning toward their homes. So if you’re in Arizona, it’s best to leave the spines alone and let nature handle the landscaping.
3. In Florida, You Must Feed the Parking Meter — Even if You Have an Elephant
Yes, this one’s from the age of the circus. Florida once had (and still technically maintains) a law stating that if you tie your elephant, goat, or alligator to a parking meter, you have to pay the same fee as a car. While elephants aren’t the average mode of transportation anymore, the law hasn’t been repealed. It’s a fun example of how states sometimes forget to update statutes when society evolves. And if nothing else, it gives “parking enforcement” a whole new meaning.
4. In Minnesota, It’s Illegal to Cross State Lines With a Duck on Your Head
No, this isn’t an early April Fool’s joke — it’s a real law. Minnesota decided long ago that crossing state lines with a duck perched on your head was a punishable offense. Historians think it was meant to curb illegal hunting practices or wildlife smuggling, but it reads more like a Monty Python sketch. The law still technically exists, and while no one’s been arrested for duck-balancing lately, it’s still enforceable. So maybe keep your feathered friends off your noggin before heading to Wisconsin.
5. In New York, You Can Be Fined for Flirting in Public
Back in 1902, New York decided flirting was a public menace and banned it outright. While no one’s been fined for giving someone the eye over coffee lately, the law technically remains. It was originally meant to discourage “improper conduct” in public spaces, but it now reads more like a humor column. The most ironic part? New York City is one of the world’s top destinations for dating and romance. If enforced today, half of Times Square would be a crime scene.
6. In Oregon, You Can’t Go Hunting in a Cemetery
At first glance, this law might sound like common sense, but apparently, it had to be written down. Oregon bans hunting in cemeteries — not exactly a high-demand hunting ground. The rule was established decades ago to preserve the dignity of burial sites, but it’s still on the books and enforceable. The weird part? It doesn’t specify what kind of hunting. So technically, even Pokémon GO players could be breaking the law.
7. In Kentucky, You Must Bathe at Least Once a Year
Good hygiene isn’t just recommended in Kentucky — it’s required by law. This ancient statute was likely meant to prevent disease in the 1800s, but it’s still part of state legal code. While modern sanitation has improved dramatically, the law has never been officially repealed. Thankfully, enforcement is nonexistent — but technically, a very stinky person could still be in violation. So if you ever needed another reason to shower, now you’ve got legal backing.
8. In California, It’s Illegal to Whistle for a Lost Canary Before 7 a.m.
There’s a law in California that makes it illegal to whistle for your lost canary before seven in the morning. It’s unclear how this came about, but most historians assume it was a noise complaint issue. While the idea of a neighborhood full of early-bird whistlers is amusing, it’s also oddly specific. The law remains, waiting for the day some overzealous pet owner tests it. It’s proof that California’s history of eccentricity runs deeper than Hollywood.
9. In Vermont, Women Still Need Permission to Wear False Teeth
Believe it or not, Vermont has an old law stating that women need written consent from their husbands to wear false teeth. It dates back to the 1800s when dental prosthetics were rare, expensive, and seen as a luxury. The law was rooted in outdated gender norms and financial control — and yes, it’s still technically valid. Obviously, it’s not enforced today, but the fact that it’s never been scrubbed from the books says a lot. Thankfully, Vermont women have long since reclaimed their right to smile freely.
10. In Massachusetts, It’s Illegal to Sing the National Anthem “Incorrectly”
Massachusetts takes patriotism seriously — maybe too seriously. It’s illegal to perform “The Star-Spangled Banner” in a “playful or disrespectful” manner. That means slowing it down, remixing it, or adding your own lyrics could technically be a violation. While no one’s been cuffed for artistic interpretation lately, the law’s wording leaves plenty of room for trouble. In an age of creativity and free expression, this one feels particularly outdated — and a little ironic for the birthplace of the American Revolution.
When Laws Outlive Their Purpose
These laws might sound hilarious, but they reveal something deeper about how society evolves while legal codes often lag behind. Each of these outdated regulations reflects a moment in history that made sense at the time—but in a modern world, they’re more confusing than helpful. What’s fascinating is how many of them technically remain enforceable, proving that sometimes bureaucracy moves slower than a tortoise in molasses.
Have you ever encountered a weird or outdated law in your state? Share your favorite finds or funny stories in the comments below.
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The post 10 U.S. Laws That Are Still Enforced — And Dangerously Outdated appeared first on Everybody Loves Your Money.
