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Ciaran Kelly

Graeme Jones opens up on untold pain he has 'never got over' and Newcastle's transformation

Graeme Jones has won a bronze medal at the World Cup with Belgium, stood on the touchline when England reached the final of the European Championships at Wembley and even played his part in Newcastle United's transformation under Eddie Howe. Yet it is not lost on the Magpies' assistant manager that his parents, Ray and Rita, have not been there to see it.

"I was so fortunate to have two great parents, but they were taken away too young," Jones told ChronicleLive.

Cancer took them both a quarter of a century apart; Ray was 72 while Rita was just 46. Losing a parent at any age is never easy, but Jones was only a young man, himself, when his mother died in 1991. It was, understandably, a 'horrendous time for everybody'.

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However, there was comfort, too, in the care Rita received at St Oswald's Hospice in Gosforth and how the doctors and nurses made Jones' mother feel 'safe' in the final week of her life. Jones searched for help, support and guidance, and he found it from those who looked after his mother.

Jones never forgot that so when the 52-year-old eventually returned to the North East, in 2021, he wanted to give back and duly became an ambassador for St Oswald's with his wife, Debbie. Together they have organised a sportsman's dinner with the hospice and Jones will share the stage with friend and former England colleague Gareth Southgate at the Hilton Gateshead next week to raise funds for the charity.

The hospice hopes to generate £50,000 from the event, which will go directly into funding the running costs of services to help keep the doors open, and Jones knows only too well how crucial that support is. The Newcastle number two also knows the pain that sons, daughters, mothers, fathers, husbands and wives are going through right this second as they watch their loved ones slip away.

"It changes your whole life," Jones said. "My dad was a widower and my brother and I were without a mother.

"She was incredible. A good mother is a cornerstone of your life and, when it gets taken away from you, you lose something. Without a doubt. You certainly lose love and affection, and somebody looking out for you.

"The dynamics of your whole family that you have known completely change - never mind the relationship you have got with your mother. I don't think I've ever got over it. You just learn to live with it."

It fell to Jones' father, Ray, to try and 'be a mam as best he could' and keep the family going. Jones worked with his dad, a contracts manager, as an insulation engineer while playing non-league football in the North East before the striker eventually got his big break at Doncaster Rovers in 1993.

Jones and his father used to do 12-hour shifts together and Ray made sure his exhausted son went for a three-mile run when they got home - even following in the car behind to time him. Ray was 'Newcastle United through and through' so it still hurts Jones that his dad never got to see him coaching at his boyhood club.

"I would not be where I am today and would never have made it as a professional footballer if it was not for my father," Jones said. "My dad was Newcastle mad to the point where he started the rebel supporters' club with Malcolm Dix back in the '60s to try and overthrow that board of directors who he felt were not giving the club enough.

"That's how ingrained it is in me and it was just so sad for me in my life that he was not here to see me become assistant manager here. I had three games as manager, which I think would have made him beyond happy."

It was Ray who first took his son along to the paddock at St James' when he was just four years of age so you can see why Jones could not turn Newcastle down when former boss Steve Bruce asked him to be his assistant in 2021. Had it been any other club, Jones would have stayed at Bournemouth, where he was working under Jason Tindall, who later went on to follow his former colleague to Newcastle alongside first-team coaches Stephen Purches and Simon Weatherstone and head of performance Dan Hodges.

Given everything that has happened since, it is remarkable to think that it has only been a couple of years since Jones returned home. In that time, there has been a change of ownership, a change of manager and a change of mentality at Newcastle.

There have been 'difficult times and good times' along the way and Jones openly admitted that he was 'not proud' of the way Newcastle played during his spell as interim boss, following Bruce's departure, when he used a negative style of football he had never advocated in all his career. However, Jones felt he had to as the former England and Belgium assistant tried to steady the ship.

Perhaps the most important aspect of that month-long caretaker spell was how united the group stayed when it would have been easy for the dressing room to splinter after winless Newcastle sank to 19th place in the table. There was no 'blame culture' so when Eddie Howe walked in, the Newcastle head coach found a group who were willing and together and the Magpies boss and his staff quickly got to work.

"We've got a group of staff who are relentless, who have got unbelievable standards, who drive the team every day," Jones said. "Between us all, we affect people and I have not seen a unity in a group of players like this since I played at Wigan. These boys are so close, so tight, and it's a real reflection of where we are as a football club at the minute. Our job is for that to continue.

"I love Ed. He is relentless, hard-working, knowledgeable, experienced, creative and demanding - everything Newcastle United need. I've managed to have a real rapport with him and I thoroughly enjoy working with him and for him. He's got a great ability to get the most out of everybody - not just the players, but his staff as well.

"The dynamics are in a real positive place. It just gives you a buzz because it's for our football club and I'm still a supporter at heart."

The turnaround under Howe has been well-documented, but it does not make it any less impressive. Yes, money has been spent, but Newcastle have recruited wisely and a host of inherited players who needed saving have been reborn, whether it is Fabian Schar, Sean Longstaff, Joelinton or Miguel Almiron.

Newcastle are now flying in fourth place in the table and the black-and-whites have reached their first League Cup final since 1976. Whatever happens at Wembley later this month, this group certainly won't be going to the capital for a day out when they face Manchester United under the arch.

"Winning an FA Cup with Wigan Athletic against Manchester City taught me anything is possible in football so if it's possible for Wigan Athletic, it's definitely possible for Newcastle United," Jones added. "I've driven that since the minute I came to the club.

"Some grounds we used to go to we had not won in 25 years and we weren't competitive. A lot of mental barriers have now been broken, and there's a proudness about the players and supporters at the club that we can go anywhere in the country and compete."

Very limited tickets are available for an evening with Graeme Jones and Gareth Southgate at the Hilton Gateshead on Thursday, February 16. For more information and to book tickets, please email KirstyMcDonald@stoswaldsuk.org. To make a donation to St Oswald’s Hospice, visit this link: https://www.justgiving.com/campaign/graemejonessportsdinner

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